


I Hate Mr. Way

by TSMaster



Category: Bandom, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Bottom Frank, Dom Gerard Way, Frerard, M/M, Punk Frank Iero, Ray Toro - Freeform, Teacher AU, Teacher Gerard Way, Teacher-Student Relationship, school au, top gerard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-27
Updated: 2015-05-23
Packaged: 2018-03-03 21:24:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 36
Words: 61,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2888429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TSMaster/pseuds/TSMaster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Frank is a rebellious sophomore in High School and has been kicked out of most of his classes. At a last resort he's been forced to take Art with Mr. Way, a sarcastic, irritating, thirty-something-year-old teacher who likes to purposefully poke fun at Frank just for a reaction. Frank is filled with hate for Gerard but can't help but be attracted to him at the same time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written a Frerard fic in a good few years so here goes. I used to have AO3 a year or two ago and I had a DeviantART a few years ago too where I wrote terrible frerard fanfics when I was like 12. I hope you enjoy.

The management corridor was way too familiar. I couldn't go a solid week without landing myself back there. The walls were a disgusting, faded yellow color and were lined with framed photographs of students and teachers of past years, hundreds of kids with the same navy blue blazers and striped ties. I looked down at my own tie. There was a scratched misfits badge in the bottom corner and a bloodstain that had turned brown. I heard the sound of heels echoing down the corridor and looked up to see one of the principals many disciples peering down over her glasses at me with the same old disappointed look.

“Mrs Lattison will see you now” 

It was the short, frizzy-haired one this time. I didn't know the names of Mrs Lattison's assistants but they'd seen me enough times to know exactly who I was. I picked up my bag and she sauntered back down the corridor on her kitten heels. 

My stomach tightened as I neared the principals office. There was a gold plate on the door with her name engraved into it. It was propped open with a doorstop and I could see the side of her face as she was typing on her computer. I got to the door and knocked tentatively. She spun round and her painted lips broke into a smile. “Mister Iero, sit.” she gestured towards the seat in front of her desk. I knew the drill. I sat down and she continued tapping away at her keyboard with her long, thin fingers. She was a very tall, skinny woman who always wore pantsuits and purple lipstick. When she was done she turned round and clasped her hands together on the desk. “Frank, what are we going to do with you?” she sighed. She wasn't angry, just really disappointed. In a way, that was much worse. I was so used to all my teachers screaming at me but Lattison actually gave a shit. “I'm running out of options with you, Frank. You know that. Yet time and time again, you continue to...” she paused and shook her head. I had just been kicked out of my last class, History, for throwing my textbook at Mr Wright. I didn't even choose History. “Maths, History, English, Drama, French, Biology... these departments wont have you back. Tell me Frank, what am I to do?” she said exasperatedly. I couldn't look at her, I just turned my head and stared out the window. “This is seriously the last straw, Frank. If you can't keep your head down and behave, I'll have no other choice but to ask you to leave.” My head snapped back round to look at her. “What!? You said they can't kick me out unless I've got a job or a college placement!” I protested. She shook her head again. I fucking hated when she did that. “What am I to do Frank? I don't have many places left to send you” she indicated to a file she had on her desk. I stared at her for a few seconds before she took out a piece of paper. “Here's your new timetable” she handed it to me. “I've put you in Art, Spanish, Chemistry and IT.” “Aw miss” I groaned “I don't know any Spanish, and Art? What do I know about Art?” I looked at her helplessly. She gave me a cold stare and narrowed her eyes. “Last chance, Iero.” 

Getting out of bed the next day was a mission. I lay there looking at the ceiling through half-lidded eyes. There were a million things I would rather have done than get up to go to these bullshit classes. I didn't know anything about them, especially Art. Then I thought of my Mom. If I dropped out of high school she'd kill me. She was the only reason I still gave a shit whether I got kicked out or not. She wanted me to go to a Catholic school since I didn't behave well in middle school. It didn't help much. So I dragged myself out of bed and put on a pair of black trousers and tie and the white shirt I'd worn yesterday and headed out. I skipped breakfast and decided to have a cigarette on my way to school instead.

I struggled to keep my eyes open through IT and Spanish. Everyone was already half way through the course and I had no idea what I was doing. The teachers didn't know what the fuck to do with me either, so most of the day I was just working through some boring textbooks. I didn't know anyone in the class, but they all knew me. Half of them expected me to do something crazy to liven up the lesson a little and the other half were clearly unhappy having me there. I had a reputation for being an annoying loudmouth. I was dreading Art the most and I felt physically sick when I saw it on my timetable. I contemplated just walking out the building at that moment, but decided to suck it up and head to the art department. I hadn't been in an Art class since middle school. My teacher was a really strict blonde woman who changed her name constantly after getting married and divorced. When I got to the Art corridor I glanced down at my timetable then back up at the three doors ahead of me. Classroom A3 – Mr Way, Art and Design. I took a deep breath and pushed open the door. 

I must have taken longer than I thought to get there because everyone was already sitting down with their work in front of them. Every head in the room turned to look at me. Well, almost every head. “Who is it?” called the teacher, without bothering to look. He had his back turned to me and was bent over a book on his desk. “I'm uh- Frank Iero... I got told to come here.” My throat was dry and my voice came out gruff and shaky. He span round in his chair and gave me a puzzled expression. “You were told to come here?” he echoed giving me a quick once-over. “Yeah, I'm in this class now” I said bluntly. I'd never seen him before but he didn't look like much of a teacher. He had shaggy black hair past his ears and stubble and his shirt wasn't buttoned up all the way. “Are you now?” he cocked an eyebrow and tilted his head to the side in a condescending way. “Yeah. I am.” I stated, folding my arms across my chest. I just wanted to sit down and get on with whatever bullshit writing he assigned me so everyone could stop staring. “Alright, I didn't hear anything about this. I guess we're just supposed to deal with students coming and going at a moments notice.” He uttered, the last part of his sentence trailing off as he got up and walked to a desk at the front that was piled high with paper and books. I couldn't help but stare as he bent over to put them down on the floor. His trousers were cut quite tight. “You can sit here” he said, drawing up a chair. I strolled over and dumped my bag down under the chair and sank down into my seat. I was right in front of his desk so I couldn't even sit on my phone without getting caught. I looked round at the class and noticed I was the only boy. Everyone was busy painting and drawing, it was far too quiet for me. All I could hear were pencils scratching and the distant humming of someone's music in their headphones. Usually there was at least one or two people whispering to each other. I looked at the girl beside me, she was halfway through a pretty impressive painting of a horse. I sighed and closed my eyes. The sooner I got kicked out of this class the better. 

I had been staring off into space for god knows how long before Mr Way snapped me back into reality. “Frank.” he said bluntly. I looked at him and felt everyone's eyes dart over to me again. “What?” I pulled one headphone out of my ear. He had his arms crossed over his chest and his eyebrows raised. “What?” I repeated, getting impatient. “Show me what you've done so far” he said, never breaking eye contact. I hated the way he stared at me like that. I felt my cheeks heating up and my chest tightening as I noticed everyone was now watching me. Did he really have to call me out in front of everyone? “I've not done anything yet” I said trying to be nonchalant but being painfully aware my cheeks were probably red. He shook his head “and why's that?” he sighed and put on a fake smile as if he was talking to a child. “I've not got a pen, sir.” I expected him to just send me out right there and then. Any other teacher would've. He did something unexpected instead, he laughed. He looked around at the other students and some of them started to titter. My cheeks were burning at this point and my brows furrowed. What the fuck was his problem? Why did he have to make a big song and dance about it? He stopped and looked at me again “in this class we have a rule, if you've not got a pen or a pencil, ask someone else. If they don't have one, then there's no art for you today. You'll just have to copy from a textbook.” I turned and looked round the class. “Anyone got a pencil they can lend Frank?” no one spoke up. “Ah, well.” He shrugged “Looks like you're going to be copying from 'the History of Impressionism'” he smiled, getting up and walking to a bookshelf. I cursed under my breath and sat forward. He handed me a pen and piece of paper and a bible of a textbook. “You'll have to invest in some pencils before you do any real work in here” he murmured quietly, smiling down at me. I didn't want to be here, I didn't want to be taught by him.I wanted to wipe that shit-eating grin off of his face. I was made to look like a dumbass on my first fucking day. I glared at him as he sauntered back over to his desk and continued what he was doing.


	2. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank discovers a little more about Mr Way

I never wanted to go back to that classroom. I kept remembering what had happened throughout the day and cringing to myself, even that night when I was at Ray's house. I was sitting on his bed in the dark, the only light coming from the video game he was playing. I was trying to pay attention but my mind couldn't help but replay the scene in my head over and over. “Dude, are you watching?” Ray protested, elbowing me. “Yeah, yeah” I uttered, averting my eyes back to the TV. Maybe tomorrow wouldn't be so bad. I couldn't help but feel my stomach sink when it dawned on me that I had to deal with this for the rest of the year. “Have you ever had Mr Way before?” I looked at him, he was staring blankly at the screen, his face illuminated. “He covered my class once when Miss Duncan was off” he said without looking away from the screen. “Really?” I perked up “what was he like?” the sound of gunshots came from the TV as Ray began massacring a horde of zombies. “He was pretty funny, but just made us get on with it. I don't remember much of him.” he said, completely enveloped in his game. “What do you mean he was funny?” I pressed. “I dunno he just cracked a few jokes. He's pretty sarcastic. Why do you care so much?” He started mashing buttons. “I don't.” The screen faded to black and the 'Game Over' message appeared. “Fucking Hell” he groaned, throwing the controller down on the floor. “I've got him for Art now. He's a dick.” Ray finally turned and looked at me “Why are you doing Art?” He asked, looking puzzled. “Ugh, I have to. I've been kicked out of everything else” I rolled my eyes. “You should drop it and take Music with me” he said casually, getting up off the bed. I laughed a little “maybe I should... dunno if Mrs Lattison would let me” I said, looking down at my hands. “She let me drop Physics to take Drama” he said, walking over to his cabinet and rummaging through his game collection. “I'll think about it” I said. 

I'd never taken Music before, but I'd always wanted to play the guitar. I went into school early the next day to try and see Mrs Lattison before class but one of her minions told me she was in a meeting. “D'you know when she'll be back?” I asked, leaning on the window pane at the front office. The receptionist rolled her eyes and shifted windows on her computer. “She'll be here for lunch but she has a visitor at two” She said matter-of-factly. “Alright, thanks” I sighed. I stepped to the side and took out my timetable to see what I had next. Art. I felt my stomach drop to the floor. I realised then that I didn't have a pen or pencil. I turned back to the receptionist. “You don't have a pen on you, do you?” I asked. She sighed and turned round in her chair and opened a drawer. “You should really be prepared when you come to school, you're a sophomore now” she droned, producing a ball-point pen and handing it to me. “Thanks, Miss” I smiled, taking the pen and putting it in my pocket. 

“Ah, Mr Iero. I was starting to wonder if you'd ever show up.” Mr Way grinned as I came in. “No, sir I was at the office” I said, hurrying to my seat. 'Mr Iero'? Why did he have to say my name like that? “I don't suppose you've brought something to write with today?” he inquired. “I have actually” I smirked pulling the pen out of my pocket. “Oh, Frankie we're so proud of you” he smiled, faking enthusiasm. Eugh, Frankie.I tried to suppress my annoyance and looked at him. Today he was wearing a black shirt with a worn out collar and slim grey trousers. And again, he had stubble along his jaw. He looked a bit scruffy, but I couldn't help but feel an odd sinking feeling in my stomach, not from dread or hatred. 

“Well, lucky you” he said, tucking his messy hair behind one ear. “You're going to be doing a worksheet on color theory” He walked over to me and put a booklet on my desk. I couldn't help but feel a bit disappointed. “Why can't I do drawing like everyone else?” I asked, glancing round the room. “Everyone else did this at the start of the year, and since you've never done Art before I want you to learn theory first.” He looked down at me. When he was close I noticed his eyes were a beautiful green-hazel color. “Understand?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. I nodded and soon realised I'd been staring at him with my mouth open. He smiled again, faint wrinkles appearing round his eyes. “Get on with it then” He turned and walked back to his desk. 

I stared at the words on the page, but they didn't seem to make any sense. I couldn't focus at all. I kept reading a whole page before realising that none of it actually sank in. Maybe it was the heat. I sighed dramatically and slumped back into my chair – attracting the attention of Mr Way. “What's the problem Frank?” he asked, sounding serious for the first time ever. “I don't get any of this” I whined a bit too pathetically. He got up from his chair and came over to where I was sitting. “What don't you get?” He looked down at the booklet, which was open at the first page. “All of it” I mumbled. He took a deep breath “Well” he began, kneeling down beside me and pointing to the paper. He was so close that I could smell his shampoo. Shampoo and coffee. I shrank away from him. He turned the page onto a question paper. “Let's to question one together, What does the colour red relate to?” He turned to look at me. “So when you see the colour red, what does it make you think of?” my brain flatlined. After a moment of silence he realised I was didn't have a fucking clue. “Red means anger, danger, passion...” he began slowly, looking straight at me. “I dunno” I mumbled. He grimaced “Red's an easy colour” he explained. Fuck you, Mr Way. I felt like an idiot every time I opened my mouth in this class. “Think of the places you'll see red used, on valentines day, at christmas...” He looked at me again, urging me to answer. “Love?” I uttered quietly, glancing at him. He smiled, this time a genuine smile. “There you go, write that down” he said, looking into my eyes. I bowed my head down and started to write, in fear of him seeing my flushed face. 

There were five minutes left until the end of the period. I found myself staring at the clock as if wishing would make time go faster. “Okay guys, I'd suggest you start packing away now” Mr Way announced, facing the class. Everyone got up and started clearing away paints and pencils. I cheered internally and picked up my bag and was just about to cram the stupid booklet into it before he appeared. “Did you manage to finish it then?” he asked. “Uh, I got up to page five” I just wanted to get my stuff and go. “I want it finished for homework then” he said. “What!?” I exclaimed a bit too loudly. “Oh yes” he nodded “there's twenty pages, everyone else managed to do it in a period, I dunno why you haven't” he shrugged. “Oh come on” I groaned, looking up at him. He glared down at me. “D'you really think I want to be sitting at home marking all your work?” he said dryly. I averted my eyes to the floor, barely able to look him in the eye. “I wanna go out and get hammered too but I have responsibilities to take care of. Maybe you should take care of yours, hm?” He must of thought I was some kind of precum child that hung around in alleys at night drinking cheap liquor and huffing glue. “Can I go now?” was all I said. He sighed and gave me one last disapproving look. “Okay. I expect that handed in by next week.”

“He was like 'Oh come on, Red's an easy color'” “That's brutal man.” “I fucking know.” 

I showed up at Ray's house instead of finishing my homework and somehow I'd got drunk and started venting about Mr Way. “What makes a color easy anyway?” Ray asked, unscrewing the cap off of a bottle of Jack Daniels' he'd stolen from his brother. “I dunno. He says a lot of pretentious crap like that” I sighed, leaning back against the wall. We were sitting on Ray's bedroom floor, surrounded by empty cans. “He sounds like a tool” Ray added. “He is. Pass me that bottle” I took the bottle of whiskey and took a long swig, it burned my throat and I couldn't help but cough. Ray had his computer in his lap “D'you think he's got Facebook” he pondered, giving me a sly smirk. “I dunno his first name” I laughed a little, figuring he wouldn't go through with it. “He's always talking to my Music teacher, they'll probably be friends” he said, typing quickly “What are you doing?” I moved closer to Ray and looked over his shoulder. Surely he wasn't serious. “I stalk Mr Richards all the time” He smirked, typing the name into the search bar. “Oh, dude come on, don't.” I groaned, shoving him. Secretly though, I kind of wanted to see his Facebook. I doubted he would be on it, he seemed like the kind of uptight hipster liberal who doesn't 'conform'. Ray started scrolling down Mr Richards' friends list. “I hope you realise you're a fucking creep” I laughed, going to shove him and spilling a drop of whiskey on the floor. “Hey, watch the laptop!” He yelled. A familiar face jumped out at me as Ray scrolled. “Wait, go back up” I pointed to the screen. He scrolled back, and sure enough, there he was. “Gerard Way” Ray scoffed. “Geraaard” He sang. “Shut up and go on his profile” I ordered. As his profile started to load I noticed his profile picture. He was standing with his arm round someone else who had been cropped out of the picture and was holding a bottle of beer in one hand. “Gerard Arthur Way” Ray laughed, clicking on his photos. “What an idiot, setting his profile to public.” I took another swig of the whiskey and tried not to gag. “Look, 'Night Out 2012'” He clicked on one album. He started scrolling through pictures. It was quite boring at first, just pictures of random people at some bar, then one picture came up. 

“HA! What the fuck kind of hair is that!?” Ray snorted, pointing at the screen. I squinted at the picture. It was Mr Way all right, but in a pair of jeans and a leather jacket, and with bright yellow hair. “He's a fucking lemon!” Ray couldn't contain himself. “Its not that fucking funny” I protested, hitting him in the shoulder. “It is man” he said, gasping for breath. “You're an idiot when you're drunk” I grabbed the laptop off him and looked at the picture again. He was standing with his arm round a woman. She had dark hair and her head was on his shoulder. They were both smiling. “D'you think that's his girlfriend?” I asked. I don't know why I felt disappointed. “Nah man he's a complete cockjockey” Ray sat up and yanked the laptop back. “Hey!” I snapped. Ray just continued stalking. I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me. I'd thought for a while that I might like guys. I hadn't told Ray, or anyone for that matter. I just told myself I was over-thinking. I've come to accept it a lot more now. I never really took an interest in girls. 

“Hey look” Ray elbowed me. “What?” I groaned, glancing back at the screen. There was a picture of him, looking a bit younger, with bright, fire-truck-red hair. “When was that?” I asked. “Four years ago” Ray said. “Oh come on you've gone too far now” I moaned, getting up. “I don't wanna think about him anymore, lets do something else” I walked over to his cabinet “lets just watch a film or something.” “What's gotten into you?” Ray laughed. “I fucking hate the guy! I have to put up with him enough so when I'm not in school the last thing I wanna do is talk about him.” Ray stared at me for a few seconds, stunned. “Well alright, man.” He closed the laptop. “What you wanna watch? Star Wars?” I took a deep breath, feeling relieved. “Yeah, Star Wars is good.”


	3. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank has an awkward encounter with Gerard

I'd been craving a cigarette all god-damn day. By break time I was practically tearing at the skin round my nails to stop the cravings. As soon as the bell went for the end of third period I darted out the class, My IT teacher calling after me. I hadn't managed to have one that morning because I'd been late. I hurried down the flights of stairs and burst through the fire door at the bottom. I was at the back of the school, in the shadow of the building. The concrete slabs were all cracked and uneven. It clearly hadn't been done up in years. There were stubbed out cigarettes all over the ground from when the cleaners had a quick smoke after school, I saw them every day when I was walking home. I leaned against the wall and took my last cigarette out of the pack and put it between my lips. I took out my lighter and held it up to the end but only sparks came out. I tried over and over but the damn thing wouldn't light. “Stupid fuckin...” I murmored under my breath as I furiously turned the striker. The fire door opened and the cigarette almost fell out my mouth. I quickly hid it behind my back. 

Who else walked out but Gerard fucking Way. I looked away, trying to avoid that disapproving stare that everyone in this school seemed to do so well. “Are you allowed to be out here?” he asked, cocking his head to the side. “Free country isn't it” I shrugged, glancing at him through my hair. He looked around, then stared at me again. “Are you hiding?” “No!” I said irritatedly . What kind of question was that. “Hm” he stepped out onto the concrete, pulling the door shut behind him. I glared at him. Why did he have to come here? Of all the places you could go. There was a moment of awkward silence before he pulled out a pack of cigarettes. I glanced over, a little shocked that he was so casual about it. I was pretty sure it was against school regulation to smoke on the grounds. And I'm pretty sure you can't smoke in front of pupils. “Can I borrow your lighter?” I asked, putting my cigarette between my lips again. He gave me a sideways glance and lit his own cigarette before passing his lighter to me. “You shouldn't be smoking” he said, a puff of smoke rising from his lips as he spoke. “Psh, you do it” I looked down at the lighter. It was black with a classic yellow smiley face on it, how original. I lit mine and took a long drag. I felt the nerves fade away and I let my eyes slip shut. “I'm an adult” he said, taking the lighter back and putting it in his pocket. He exhaled, blowing the smoke up into the air, I couldn't help but stare. “And I'm not?” I argued. He laughed a little, smoke coming out of his nostrils. I realised I sounded like a whiny little kid, why was I even talking to him. I looked ahead and took another drag. 

“Have you done your homework?” 

I closed my eyes again, my face screwing up. “Fuck” I whispered. I heard him sigh “well, you'll just have to do it at lunch then” “Aw come on” I groaned, feeling the life drain out of me. “I have to eat, you know” I looked at him. I didn't want to be stuck with him any longer than I had to. “Should've thought about that before you didn't do your homework” He smirked, raising his eyebrows before turning away and pulling out his phone. I looked him up and down. He was wearing a white pinstripe shirt this time, tucked into his trousers. He had quite a nice body. He wasn't the skinniest guy but he had quite small waist. He had his sleeves rolled up too. He was quite pale and I noticed he still had paint on his hands. “Get your lunch and bring it to my classroom” he said, putting his phone away again. “You can eat it after you've done.” I sighed and put my cigarette between my lips again. “I'm serious, Iero. You can't get away with this shit in my class” he said, throwing his cigarette on the ground and stubbing it out with his shoe. I was a little taken aback that he swore in front of me. “Okay” I uttered. “See you at lunch” he turned round and went back inside and I let out a deep breath. 

I never ate lunch at school, but waiting in the line at the cafeteria would hopefully kill time. I was dreading being left alone with him. I just hoped it wouldn't be quiet and awkward like earlier. I bought a can of coke and decided I couldn't put it off any longer. I'd just write down any dumb answer to get out of there as quick as possible. 

“Frank, come in” he smiled when he saw me at the door. I walked in and sat at my usual desk, taking out the booklet and turning to the page I was working on. “Do you want me to play some music?” he asked. Music, yes, praise the lord. I wouldn't have to suffer in silence. “Yeah, please” I took my pen out of my pocket. “What do you like?” he asked, pulling up his music library on his computer. “Oh, uh.. I dunno...” “Come on, I'm not some old geezer, I bet I have something you know” he interrupted. “Well, uh... Misfits?” I asked. “See? I know the Misfits. I have some on here” He smiled. A few seconds later, the opening of American Psycho was playing. I took my can of coke out of my pocket and opened it. “Hey, y'know coke's the worst thing in the world for you?” he mentioned just as I pressed my lips to the rim. What the fuck kind of sense did that make? “Well thats rich coming from you” I sniggered. “You were smoking earlier.” “Yeah but coke fucks up your blood, its full of sugar” he argued, not bothering to look at me. It was pointless to argue at this point, I just shook my head and tried to get on with my work. 

By the time I finished I had cramp in my hand. “I'm finished, Mr Way” I grinned. Feeling a little bit of pride. It was probably the most work I'd done in a class this year. “Well done Frank, bring it here” He said, holding his hand out. I stood up and pulled my bag over my shoulder and went to hand him it. He scanned the first few pages, not saying anything. I stood looking over his shoulder patiently, silently pleading him to hurry up so I could leave. “What's this mess?” He asked. “What?” “This” he pointed to my answer. “My handwriting?” “Yeah, its a mess” he laughed. “Hey I was rushing, I wanted to get it done. My hand really hurts now” I pouted. “Oh boo hoo” He rolled his eyes. I felt my anger pushing up inside until my cheeks flushed red. He was such a fucking prick. “Thats fine, Frankie” he smiled, spinning round and handing it back to me. “Don't you want it?” I asked. “You keep it for notes” he said. “You can go now” he span back round, turning his back on me. I stood there for a few seconds, not wanting to leave but not knowing what to say, when the bell rang. “See you” I mumbled, turning to head out the door. “Where are you going Frank?” he called. I turned round, confused for a second. “You're with me this period.” I closed my eyes and sighed. “Fucking hell” I uttered under my breath.


	4. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank gets an urge

The last few days had been unbearable. The weather was getting hotter in New Jersey, and the last thing I wanted to be wearing was a shirt and tie. “Jesus, why don't they invest in some fucking fans” I groaned, letting my head fall onto my desk. “Hey, you're not the one wearing a blazer” Ray argued, leaning back in his chair. “They'll never get me to wear one of those. I'd look like a tool” I let my eyes slip shut as the teachers droning voice slowly turned into a distant murmor. “Frank, dude sit up” Ray hissed and kicked the back of my chair, trying to get my attention. “You'll get us both in trouble.” I sighed and practically pushed myself up off the desk, propping my chin up on my hand and staring blankly at the teacher. At least I had Ray to talk to in my Chemistry class, even if I hated the subject. “Hey did you see Mr Way this morning?” Ray whispered from the desk behind me. I turned round and looked at him through half-lidded eyes “no... why?” Ray only smirked. “What?” I pressed. “He has a black eye” I felt my stomach leap. “What? Is it bad?” I asked, trying to not sound so desperate. “Its not too bad. I bet someone beat him up” he laughed. I turned back round, looking up at the clock. Mr Way didn't really seem like the type to get into a fight. He didn't seem like much of a fighter. 

Strangely enough, I didn't feel an overwhelming sense of dread when I saw Art was next on my timetable. Probably because I knew I wasn't reading from a bullshit textbook. I pushed open the door with a smile on my face. “Morning” I said as I passed Mr Way's desk. I wasn't so sure why I said that, It just slipped out. “It's the afternoon” he corrected. I grimaced with embarrassment and continued to my seat. Everyone else knew what they were doing, getting out their folders and paintings from yesterday. “So, uh.. What am I doing today?” I asked, tapping my desk. Mr Way turned to look at me again. I saw his eyes scan over me quickly before he got up. “Well I think today you should practice sketching” He said, walking over to a counter and picking up a mirror and a piece of paper, then walking to my desk. “Start by drawing yourself. It doesn't have to be completely accurate or finished, we just want to build up your drawing skills” he said, placing them on my desk. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, I looked horrific. My face was all flushed and there were strands of hair stuck to my forehead with sweat. “I'm not too sure where to start” I said, there was something intimidating about that blank piece of paper. I heard him take a sharp breath before producing a pencil from his pocket and grabbing another piece of paper. “Well, let me try first” he said, kneeling down and leaning on my desk. Up close, I saw the yellow and purple bruise round his eye. It looked swollen, and sore as hell. He glanced up at me quickly, then bowed his head and started drawing. His hands were hypnotising and I couldn't help but stare. It didn't look like much at first, but soon enough I started to see my features come out. “Now this is just a quick drawing” he uttered. He glanced back up at me and our eyes met. One corner of his mouth turned upwards into a lopsided smirk before he looked back at the paper. A sinking feeling quickly found its way into my stomach, creeping up to my throat until I found it a bit hard to breathe. He had his tongue sticking out of his mouth slightly in concentration. He looked back up and I realised my mouth had been open the whole time. “See?” he held up the piece of paper. It was me alright, a little rough and sketchy, but I liked it that way. “Oh... that's really good” was all I managed to say. “Yep” he said, standing up. “Thats why I'm the teacher.” That sinking sensation went away. He just couldn't say something nice could he? “I did that in a few minutes, see if you can do something like that in the period.” he turned away, leaving me with the drawing. 

For a little while I actually tried. I drew out my face and one eye, but I couldn't get the other eye in the right place, and then I realised my jaw was crooked. Eventually I only had a piece of paper covered in little bits of eraser to show for my half an hour of work. I stared down at the paper, chewing the end of my pen. I saw Mr Way walking across the room from the corner of my eye. I looked up and saw that he'd taken his tie off and rolled up his sleeves. At least I knew it wasn't just me that was too hot. He was attempting to open the windows, but the school was ancient, so it took quite a bit of force to shove them open. He got on his tiptoes and reached up, his shirt rising up a little in the process. I could just see the waistband of his boxers. I bit down and stared, noticing the thin, dark trail of hair coming from underneath his shirt and disappearing into his underwear. He tried shoving the window open, grunting a little and cursing under his breath. I bit down more and suddenly a horrible taste hit me. “Eugh” I yelled in disgust, taking the pen out of my mouth. The damn thing had burst. “Fuck!” I gasped, noticing the ink had gotten all over my hands. “Frank?” I looked up at Mr Way, then the rest of the class who were now staring at me. “C-can I go to the bathroom?” I asked, dropping the pen on the desk. Mr Way laughed a little and shook his head “Yeah, you better hurry up though.” 

“Psh, what the hell happened to you!?” Ray laughed as I approached him at lunch. “My pen burst” I said, dropping my bag down on the concrete next to the bench he was sitting on. “How did that happen?” He laughed, indicating to the black stain on my cheek and lip. “I dunno, alright” I sighed, pulling my pack of cigarettes out of my mouth. “So, did you see Mr Way?” he asked, sitting back and taking out a cigarette of his own. “Yeah, he looks like shit” I said, Ray sniggered. 

That day when I got home, I took out the sketch Mr Way had done. It really did look like me. I took time and looked at every detail, every curve and every line. I stood up and took a piece of blue tack from my desk and put it up above my bed, then I got an urge. I tore out a piece of paper from my Chemistry book and found a pencil. I sat down in front of the mirror, taking a good look at myself, from every angle, and started to draw.


	5. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank gets sick of Gerard

I had Art first thing the next day. I took one last look at my drawing as I neared school, before folding it and putting it in my pocket. I was a little nervous about what Mr Way would say, but it was better than showing him nothing. I felt my chest getting tighter and tighter the closer I got to his classroom. There were only a few girls sitting down by the time I got there, for once I was early. I approached his desk “Sir?” He turned round and looked at me and I saw his black eye had only gotten darker. “Yes?” he smiled. His hair looked messier than usual and he had a stain on his shirt, he looked as if he'd just woke up. “Oh, I did this last night” I said, pulling my gaze away from his and taking the folded piece of paper out of my trouser pocket. I unfolded it, trying not to show that my hands were trembling. He took it from me and examined it, nodding slightly. “This is good” a smile broke out onto my face. His approval meant a lot. “Really?” It was a drawing of myself. It didn't look like much but it had taken me hours and a lot of rubbing out. “You did this on lined paper?” “Oh, yeah I didn't have any other paper” I stammered. He hummed to himself and looked closer. I stared at him, looking for any kind of reaction. “You ripped this out of some other book?” I nodded. “Well why don't you just ask next time” he said, turning around and handing it back to me. I looked down at it. The more I looked at it the more flaws I noticed. “Is it good enough?” I asked. He stared up at me, his eyes unblinking and his mouth twisted into a crooked smile. 

“No.”

I felt a stab of pain in my chest for a split second, then I just got angry. “It's not up to the standard of everybody else, but practice makes perfect.” he uttered, turning back round and sipping his coffee. No, I wasn't going to let him brush me off this time. “What the fuck am I even doing in this class then?” I must have taken him off guard because I wiped the smile right off his face. “Excuse me?” His voice got really high, not quite believing I actually talked back to him. “Why the fuck am I even here if I'm not good enough? I don't even give a fuck about Art!” I raised my voice. The rest of the class quickly caught on and soon enough all eyes were on me. Mr Way just sat there, mouth opening and closing, completely taken aback and not quite sure what to say. “ You think I give a shit about this bullshit class?” I yelled, throwing the paper down onto the ground. The room fell silent for a moment. “Get out!” Mr Way said calmly. I spun round and stormed out. 

I didn't stop walking, I kept walking down the corridor and out of the department. I pushed open the fire door and stepped out into the sun. My eyes began to sting, I begged myself not to cry but soon enough my vision started to blur and I couldn't help but let out a sob. I rubbed my eyes with the sleeve of my shirt until it hurt and tried to stop breathing so hard. I had never cried about being yelled at before. What the fuck was my problem today. I heard the fire door open behind me. “There you are” he said, relieved. It was Mr Way, I didn't turn around. “Sorry, I didn't mean to raise my voice” he said softly. “I didn't want to upset you... I was just being a dick.” It was a bit reassuring to hear him admit that. “Yeah...” I said, wiping my nose and sniffing. I heard him sigh and it went quiet again. 

“I don't really realise how harsh I'm being when I say stuff like that” 

“It's fine.” 

I didn't care if I was being childish or passive aggressive. I was fucking mad. “Frank...” he sighed. I turned round and looked at him, just praying he couldn't tell I'd been crying. It clearly didn't work cause he just tilted his head and gave me the most pitying look. “Oh, Frank...” I glanced down at the ground, unable to make eye contact. “I'm...” he started. I didn't let him finish, I lunged forward and threw my arms round him. I'm not even sure if I knew why. It definitely took him by surprise because he stumbled backwards a little. “You're not going to kick me out are you?” I mumbled into his chest. He was stunned into silence for a moment. “No, I won't.” I closed my eyes and prayed I didn't start wailing again. I felt his arms wrap round my shoulders. He was warm and smelt like cheap cologne. I felt safe like with his arms round me and I almost didn't want to let go. It felt like minutes that we stood like that but it couldn't of been more than a few seconds. Eventually I pulled away and looked up at him. “Sorry” I mumbled. He just smiled and shook his head. “It's fine... we should probably get back now” he said, patting my shoulder. I nodded and followed him back inside. 

“He's not kicking you out?” “No, thank god.” I sighed in relief. “Well, you've done worse” Ray replied. He was right, teachers had kicked me out for worse reasons than talking back. I'd called Ray after school and told him all about it, leaving out the hug part. I still couldn't believe I'd done that. “Good for you though, what a fucked up thing to say” he said down the line. “Yeah... hey did you persuade your brother to get us beer for Saturday?” I grinned. I always loved staying at Ray's at the weekend. It took my mind off things and it was better than staying at home, alone. My Mom worked late nights and the house was way too quiet. “Oh... yeah, dude I can't do Saturday” he said. I could tell he was trying to let me down lightly. “We always stay over on the weekends though” I whined. I really didn't want to be annoying but I couldn't help but be a little upset. “I'm going on a date” he said casually. “What!? With who?” I piped up.“A girl in my music class, You'd like her.” Ray had never mentioned anything about any girl. “Okay then...” I tried not to sound too bothered. “You can come with us if you want?” I really didn't want to be a cockblock, so I politely declined and ended he call quickly. I let out a deep breath and sank down onto my bed. I hated being alone.


	6. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard gives Frank an offer

It was a little humiliating going back to Art on Monday. I had just spent a very boring weekend alone after being ditched by Ray – which I was still angry about - and I wasn't in the mood for any confrontation. I made my way to the art corridor as slowly as possible, dragging my feet as I went. I just prayed to god that everyone acted like nothing happened. 

The silence was deafening. I wasn't used to such a quiet class before. It was torture. I scanned the room before my eyes landed on the girl next to me. She had dark, frizzy hair that was covering her face as she bent down over the desk, completely absorbed in her work. “Hey” I whispered. Her head shot up. She looked at me, then everyone else to check that yes, I was talking to her. “What are you drawing?” I asked in a hushed tone. She looked down at her page and cleared her throat “I'm drawing horses.” She replied, stating the obvious. “I don't know what to do” I whined. I noticed she had a smudge of charcoal pencil on her cheek. Mr Way had told me to build up a 'series of studies' of any subject I chose. “Well, what do you like to look at? What do you find pretty?” she smiled. I bit my lip and racked my brain. Mr Way was pretty, and I certainly liked looking at him. I pushed that thought away and tried to figure something else out. Eventually she turned away and went back to her work, leaving me with my thoughts again.

I didn't get any work done that day. And when the bell sounded, alerting that it was the end of the period, I was the first up and out of my seat. I was almost at the door when Mr Way stopped me. “Mr Iero could I talk to you for a minute?” a sudden wave of nerves hit me like a punch in the gut. “Yeah?” I asked hesitantly. “Come here” he gestured with his finger for me to come closer. I walked round to the side of his desk, digging my nails into my bag strap to stop myself from shuddering. What had gotten into me recently? I'd turned into a reclusive mess. He continued what he was doing on the computer until the last person left and the door slammed shut. 

“Are you interested in Art, Frank?” he asked, continuing to stare at the computer instead of me. Was he kidding? Did he not hear anything I said last week when I flipped? “Uh... I dunno” I mumbled. I couldn't help but notice that the swelling had gone down round his eye, the yellow-purple colour had gone and now it was just a little bit brown. “How can you not know?” he smirked, turning his head to look up at me. “Please, have a seat” He offered. I took a chair from the nearest desk and dragged it over, as far away from him as I could without it seeming like I was deliberately trying to avoid him. “I have the opportunity to take two students to an Art show at the University of Design in New York next month” he smiled. “Yeah?” I questioned, still not putting the pieces together. He stared at me for a few seconds, as if waiting for a reaction.“I'd like to ask you, stupid” he laughed. Oh no, I'd have to go to a dumb Art show with Mr Way. Mr Way and I. Outside school. Together. 

“Oh, uh, I don't know-” I stuttered, a little flustered that he'd even suggest that. Why me? Of all the kids in this class. There were plenty of people here that practically jizzed at the mention of a Van Gogh painting, what did I care about art? “Well I reckon you've got some potential, and I can tell you care about improving” he said. I'd noticed he spoke with his hands a lot when he was explaining things. I glanced down at them, he did have some nice-looking hands. I shook my head – trying to push the thoughts away. “Are you alright?” he asked, his tone turning from enthusiastic to concerned. “Nothing- I mean- I'm fine” I nodded, my eyes meeting his. I hated the way he stared at me, his eyes were so steady and unblinking. How did he manage it? I couldn't look the man in the eye for more than a few seconds before it became unbearable. But now, both of us looking at each other, staring into those big green eyes, I found it hard to look away. “How did you get that black eye?” I asked, my voice cracking a bit. I didn't know what I was saying, I was blurting out anything to fill the dead air. He sniggered a little, to my surprise. “It's not what you think” he smiled, reaching one hand up to touch the uneven skin. “I wasn't in a fight, although that might have been a better story to tell people” I couldn't help but laugh quietly, his giggle was contagious. “My niece hit me with a baseball” he nodded “She's six.” He had a niece. I was beaming like an idiot at the thought. “That's cute” I said, looking back down. “I'm cute?” he questioned. “No, no- I meant, well-” I stuttered. I felt myself turning red again. The guy must've thought my natural skin tone was that of a tomato. “You're adorable” he uttered. My eyes widened and I stared straight at him. I felt as if I was having an out-of-body experience. Did he really just say that? Did I imagine it. I realised soon enough that yes, he did because he was fumbling around on his desk for something and trying to change the subject. “Well” he began, clearing his throat. “Uh- about that trip” he said, lifting random crap as he searched for something. This was the first time I'd seen him squirm. He was usually so cool and collected but clearly he'd blurted something out he hadn't mean to. Both of us were going red now. “Here, you'll have to get your parents to sign this” he said, handing me a sheet of paper. I scanned over it quickly, it was the usual, emergency phone numbers and the like. “I dunno if I can-” I tried to explain. “Look, just think about it” he said, running a hand through his hair as he tried to compose himself again. “I was thinking of asking Luna” he nodded. Luna, I thought, was that the girl that sat next to me? I'd faintly recalled someone saying that name before. “Right” I said, drawing my eyes away from the paper. “It'll be good fun” he smiled encouragingly. “Have a think about it.” 

I couldn't focus for the rest of the day. I kept going over what Mr Way had said in my head. I wished I'd said something, but what could I have said? 'Golly, thanks I think you're pretty cute too'. I felt a little sick when I thought about it. Did I feel sick because it was wrong or because I realised I was so helplessly attracted to him? Every so often I took the form out of my pocket and looked at it. He'd written my name in the top left hand corner. He had messy handwriting and it would be almost unintelligible without the huge 'F' at the start. He'd chosen me specifically to go with him, and I was still having trouble figuring out why. Anyone else in the class would've been better suited than me. I sighed and scrunched the letter up and shoved it in my pocket, telling myself not to think about it any more. I would just tell him that I couldn't go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I only just realised now that Sophomore in high school is ages 15-16. I'm from the UK so I don't know how American Schools work but Frank is 17 and therefore a junior


	7. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank makes a decision

I'd completely forgotten about Mr Way's offer after a few days, which was probably a good thing. Until one night at Ray's. It was almost 11pm and we'd spent the whole night eating Doritos and watching terrible Netflix movies. We'd just finished watching 'Baby's Day Out' when Ray got up for a bathroom break. “You need a drink or anything?” he asked, wiping crumbs off his shirt. “No thanks” I said, reaching for my phone. “Alright.” 

I'd reached into my hoodie pocket to get my phone, but my hand touched a piece of paper I didn't realise was there. I pulled it out and unfolded it, squinting in the dim light. It was the information sheet Mr Way had given me. Again, a wave of nerves washed over me as I remembered what he'd told me. The trip was next week, and I'd made a firm decision that I wasn't going, although missing school seemed tempting. 

“What's that?” Ray asked as he entered the room again, wiping his hands on his jeans. “Nothing” I sighed, folding it up again. “Doesn't look like nothing” he sat down beside me and picked up the remote. “It's just this trip thing” I began, making the explanation as brief as possible. “I'm not going.” I shoved it back into my pocket, hoping I would forget about it later. “Oh, where's it to?” he asked casually. He was just making conversation but I wished he'd just drop it. “Some art show at the university in New York” I replied. “Oh” Ray piped up with a sudden wave of enthusiasm. “My brothers' girlfriends' friend goes there, I think she's got a painting or something in the show.” “Oh right” I faked interest. It didn't persuade me any more to go. I didn't give a shit if Ray's mom's friends' hairdresser knew a guy who had a painting in the show. “I should get going” I said, noticing the time from the clock on Ray's bedside table. “Right” he said “Are we still up for Saturday?” he smiled. I winced a little, remembering how he blew me off last week, but I couldn't go another weekend bored out of my mind. “Yeah, I'll come over after school.” “Sweet.”

My Mom was already home by the time I got there. She was sitting at the kitchen table with her coat still on smoking a cigarette. She was usually too tired to talk when she got home and only stayed for a cigarette and a glass of wine before going to bed. “Hey” I said, walking into the kitchen. “Where were you?” she asked, blowing smoke out of her nose. “Ray's house.” She didn't even have to ask. I was always at Ray's house. She nodded in reply. I took out the piece of paper and unfolded it again, laying it down on the table. “What's'at?” she mumbled. “It's a form for a school trip” I said. “I need you to sign it.” She squinted down at it before running her spare hand through her bleached blonde hair. “What kinda' trip?” I bit my lip, wondering what she'd think if I told her the truth. “It's to a museum.” She took a drag of her cigarette, the embers at the end glowing as she inhaled. “Do I have to pay anything?” Mr Way hadn't mentioned a fee, so I assumed not. “Alright, get me a pen.” I went into the hall and grabbed my bag, rummaging around in the front pocket for the pen I'd stolen from my IT teacher. Eventually I found it and took it back to my Mom. Her hands were trembling a little as she wrote and her writing came out shaky. I just hoped Mr Way believed it wasn't my writing. “Here” she handed me the piece of paper. “Thanks.” I took it and shoved it into my bag. I knew I wasn't going, but it was just in case. 

The next day seemed to go on forever. Probably because I didn't get to sleep until the early morning. My brain just refused to shut off. I kept running scenarios through my head. I thought about what would happen if I'd actually decided to go to the art show. What was the worst that could happen? I could embarrass myself more in front of Mr Way, yes. But it meant a day out of school, which was always a positive. I'd much rather be in New York making a dick out of myself than stuck in school. Maybe Mr Way was right, maybe I did have potential. Did he even mean that or was he just making up any old bullshit to get me to come along? I didn't have much time to dwell on that thought because the bell went for fifth period. I tore myself back into reality and gathered up my stuff to head for art. 

“Alright guys, settle down, we're just continuing on from yesterday” Mr Way's voice echoed down the corridor. He turned to look at me as I walked through the door, but I didn't have time to get to my seat before he was calling me over to talk to him. “Did you have a think about it?” he asked in a lowered voice. “Oh- the trip” I acted surprised, as if I hadn't been thinking about it all day. “Yeah I've thought about it” “Well?” he beamed up at me expectantly. Why was this so damn important to him? There was no avoiding it now. “Um...” My voice wavered, I couldn't hide the fact that I was filled with doubt. I glanced up at him, waiting for the inevitable, only to see he looked heartbroken. His face had fell, his mouth facing downward into a pout and his eyebrows lowered. My heart sank. I felt like I was breaking up with someone. “I mean...” I stuttered. I couldn't deal with that face, I just wanted to grab him and kiss him right there to stop him from frowning. I probably would've if I wasn't frozen on the spot by that stare of his. “I'll go” I said. Then all that sadness went away and his eyes filled with joy again. “Great, do you have your form?” he smiled, turning round and writing something down on a piece of paper. I pulled it out of my bag and handed it to him. Great, I'd just been trapped into doing something by Mr Way's beautiful face. 

I still didn't have a clue what to draw either. I looked over at the frizzy girl who I assumed was called Luna. She had finished her painting and was now using thick, charcoal blocks to sketch. I sighed and looked at my own self portrait. I had to admit, art was way harder than it looked. I was about to look around the room for inspiration, but I caught eyes with Mr Way. He blinked and quickly averted his eyes back to his computer screen. Had he been staring at me? He was definitely looking in my direction. If he had a problem with me why didn't he come out and say it. I hated the way he messed with my head. I had never expected to be this stressed out about a subject before.


	8. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank is seriously worried about Ray and can't stop thinking about Gerard.

When I approached our regular bench at lunch, Ray was nowhere to be found. I assumed he must've been held up in the line at the cafeteria or talking to a teacher. I sat down and took out my pack of cigarettes, only to realise there were none left. I cursed under my breath and threw the empty box on the ground. I realised must have looked like a complete loser sitting by myself, and after about ten minutes I got sick of it and decided to go look for Ray instead. I picked up my bag and threw it over my shoulder. Ray had pulled this shit too many times and I was getting sick of it. He was my only friend, of course I was going to get mad. 

I assumed he'd been in music before lunch, so that's where I headed. The corridors were all empty since everyone was either sitting in the cafeteria or outside. My footsteps echoed as I stormed down the hallway, furious and a little bit hurt that I'd been left by myself without so much as a text from Ray. I was about to turn the corner when I saw a familiar mess of curly hair. I backtracked behind the corner and peered around. It was Ray, but not just Ray. He was with a girl. Ray was holding his guitar case, his back turned to me. The girl was a little shorter than him, with short brown hair and a lip ring. He'd blown me off to go see some girl? I wondered if it was the same girl he left me to see last weekend. Suddenly, Ray took a step forward and bent down to plant a kiss on her lips. 

Why didn't Ray tell me he had a girlfriend? I wasn't sure how to feel. Angry? Upset? Betrayed? She put her arms round his neck and he ran his up her back. I guess I was happy for him in some ways, but I couldn't help but feel overwhelmingly jealous, though I wasn't sure who of; Ray, for having a girlfriend, or her, for getting Ray's undivided attention. I was so enveloped in my own feelings that I didn't notice someone come up behind me. 

“What are you doing?” 

I ducked behind the wall and spun round, only to be met with that pair of big green eyes. “G-Gerard” I stammered.

“What?”

“I mean- Mr Way” 

“How do you know my first name?” 

His face contorted into a puzzled expression. I couldn't come up with an excuse before he looked round the corner. “Why are you spying on people?” he looked at me as if I was some kind of psychopath. “I'm not!” I argued. I clearly was. This was far worse than anything else he'd called me out on. This moment was up there on the chart of most humiliating moments in my life, right next to that time the mail man caught me walking around my house naked. 

“Hey, get a room you guys, this isn't a romance novel!” 

There was a bit of whispering before eventually I heard a door closing. Mr Way turned to look at me again “Who was that?” I took a deep breath and looked up at him as he was quite a bit taller than me. “My friend.” he simply nodded. He was holding a tupperware box full of pasta and a fork so he was clearly going for his lunch. “Is that all?” I asked, wishing he'd just go away. “Psh” he laughed. “No need to get pissy with me... look I know how you're feeling-” he started. “Do you now?” I mumbled under my breath. I didn't mean for him to hear, but he did and continued anyway. “I do. I get it. Your friends' got a girlfriend and you don't, I you're probably a little bit jealous, everyone gets like that sometimes” “Don't talk about me like you know me” I spat, pushing past him forcefully and heading for the double doors at the end of the corridor, but before I could get anywhere he grabbed my shoulder “Hey, I'm just trying to help” I stopped and looked at his hand. “I know how you feel.” Why was he such a condescending dick all the time? I looked into his eyes again. He looked so genuine, but how was I supposed to trust him if he was always making fun of me? I glanced at his lips. They looked soft. That urge to kiss him came back and everything else went still. He was saying something but my brain was fuzzy, full of white noise. I pulled myself out of a trance and shook him off before I could think of anything else. I turned and headed down the corridor, I heard him calling after me but I didn't turn around. “You can't run from me forever y'know” he said, his voice bouncing off the walls. I continued down the hallway and pushed through the double doors. I wasn't going to let him get into my head. 

Saturday night at Rays was supposed to be fun. I still hadn't told him about accidentally spying on him. He was trying to tell me about some movie I should really watch, but I spaced out. I tried to tell myself Mr Way wasn't worth my time and thinking about him in that way was just wrong, but I couldn't help it. “Frank!” “What?” I sighed, looking at Ray, who'd just been 'getting to the good part'. “What the hell is up with you today?” he said, shoving me. “Don't-” I sighed, about to get up off the bed. “No, what's been going on with you dude? You're not paying attention, you wont talk to me. It's like you're in a trance all the time. It's fucking annoying!” he looked serious now. Why was he getting pissed off at me? I was he one having a dilemma here. “Nothings wrong it” I lied “Just drop it.” I couldn't look him in the eye, I stared at the TV instead. “I'm your friend, aren't you gonna talk to me?” “That's rich coming from you.” “What d'you mean 'coming from me'?” “You and your fucking girlfriend” 

It was like a flick had been switched in him. He went from pissed off to endearingly defensive. “What?” he spluttered, laughing a little. “My girlfriend?” “Yeah, your fucking girlfriend. You blew me off to go see her at lunch all last week” my voice was getting louder and louder. All my frustration at him and Mr Way all came out in that moment. It had been a pretty stressful couple of weeks. Ray was speechless. “I... Who?” He kept acting clueless, I was tired of it. “I'm going home” I sighed, getting up from the couch and walking out the living room.


	9. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard and Frank have a bit of a moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's a little bit longer, lucky you. 
> 
> I also wanna thank you guys for all your comments and kudos, It really makes my day. 
> 
> P.S if you need a visual, just look at this gif https://38.media.tumblr.com/563ef7a4dba2c56d5663eb4f040c9314/tumblr_mm34t3FNv11qj65cxo1_500.gif

I had no idea what Monday was going to be like, I'd fallen out with my only friend and the teacher I happened to spend the most time with. There was no way I was going to get through a double period of art. Towards the end of my Spanish class I was praying that by some fluke accident a ceiling tile would fall top of me and crush me. Unfortunately, no such thing happened, and I still had to go to Mr Way's class. 

I didn't deliberately take my time in getting there, I just happened to walk quite slow and everyone else had got there early. I hadn't even took two steps into the room before Mr Way sent me back out again. I grumbled some expletives under my breath and trudged back out again, letting the door slam quite loudly behind me, that was deliberate. I let my bag drop onto the floor and I leaned against the wall, too exhausted to even hold myself up. 

“The bell went ten minutes ago” Mr Way sighed as he walked out the class. “You better have a good excuse lined up” he put his hand on the door frame next to my head. “I don't” I mumbled, arms folded and head bowed. He took a deep breath, trying to compose himself. “Where were you last period?” he said in that fake eloquence that teachers do when they're trying to act professional but are really just pissed off. “Spanish.” “It takes five minutes to get here from Spanish.” I couldn't even be bothered to retort with a witty comeback, I just stared at the floor. “Jesus, Frank look at me” he sighed, grabbing both my shoulders and pulling me round to face him. I instinctively shoved him off, pushing on his chest with both hands. “Alright, alright” he said, throwing his hands up in surrender when he realised he might have crossed the line. If anyone had seen him do that he'd be fired on the spot, luckily for him though, it was just us. “Sorry... its just... I was worried about you last week” he started, looking down at me with those round, puppy-dog eyes. “You seemed like you had a lot on your mind.” I peered up at him. He reached up to anxiously tuck a strand of black hair behind his ear before shoving his hand back in his pocket. Was he nervous? He seemed very fidgety this morning. Maybe he'd just had too much black coffee. “Is everything alright at home? It's just, I don't want it affecting your schoolwork” he said, raising his eyebrows as he talked. I was amazed at how well he kept eye contact. “I'm...” I stuttered. I was trying to say I was fine, but the last part didn't come out. When he stared into me like that it was hard to lie about anything. “I'm not fine” I blurted. “Well everyone gets like that sometimes” I saw what seemed like a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. 

“If you ever need to talk about it...” he began, the start of what I assumed was a big drawn out speech. Thankfully he was interrupted when one of the classroom doors swung open. He fell silent pretty quickly as a red-headed woman walked out, glancing between us and shooting Mr Way a knowing smile before picking up a stack of printouts from the printer. It was painfully quiet. He nodded back at her before looking back at me and tapping his foot impatiently. After what seemed like minutes she returned to her classroom. “What I was trying to say” Mr Way resumed. “If you need to talk to anyone about anything, my doors' always open” he smiled. “Thanks” I nodded. I didn't sound too overjoyed because I was trying to contain the tingling feeling that was taking over my body. Fuck Butterflies, it was like a nest of Hornets in my stomach. “It means a lot” I added, hoping I sounded sincere. He turned away quickly but I just saw a glimpse of a smile behind his hair. “Have you decided on a subject matter yet?” he asked in his normal tone of voice. He was like a different person when he switched from concerned to regular, old, satirical Mr Way. “Uh... I had one idea, but I dunno if it's appropriate really” I shrugged, feeling a sudden sense of anxiety creeping over me. “What would that be then?” he smiled encouragingly. “Uh...” I almost wanted to say forget it, but that would leave me with nothing. “Uh, the male figure” I stated. I'd come up with the idea thinking that drawing myself would be the easiest thing I could do. I was expecting him to toss the idea out straight away, I couldn't draw naked guys in class. “Hm” he thought to himself, biting his lip and furrowing his brows. “Well, that'd be tricky. You'd need to find someone to model for you” he said. “I mean, you could always get some from the internet, but they wouldn't necessarily be the same all the way through, and it'd be hard to find the perfect position” I tried not to think of how dirty the last part of his sentence was. “Yeah. I dunno” I itched the back of my neck. “You gotta believe in yourself” he laughed, putting a hand on my shoulder. I had to admit, I kind of liked that feeling. “Let's go back in now, right. Try to look as if you've been shouted at” he smirked before pushing the door open. 

I had no idea where to go for lunch. I couldn't go to the bench since Ray and I hadn't made up yet. And even if he didn't show up, I didn't want to be alone. There was only one place I could think of going, so after fifth period I gathered up my stuff and headed down the corridor. I waited until the crowds had cleared before ducking out the fire door. I didn't know why my heart sank when I realised Mr Way wasn't there. Whenever he was around I was always silently begging him to go away. I threw my bag down on the ground and sat down cross-legged on the concrete, which I instantly regretted as I felt a seeping cold. I prayed it was just the cold and not dampness. The last thing I needed was to walk around the rest of the day with a wet ass. Before I could get up though, The fire door swung open and the very man I was just thinking about stepped out. 

“Hey” I smiled, getting up from where I was sitting and wiping the back of my trousers quickly. “Hi” he replied, looking around before letting the door slide shut. He pulled out his cigarettes from his pocket and put one between his lips. My hands were empty and I wasn't sure what to do with them. I settled on just putting them in my pockets. “No cigarette for you today then?” he asked before taking the cigarette between two fingers and inhaling. “I ran out the other day” I stated, although at that moment I really desperately needed one. I started picking at the skin of my fingernails, something I usually did when I was gasping for a smoke. “Here” he slid open the top of his packet and held it out to me. They were the more expensive brand, and I'd never tried them before, but at that point I didn't care. “Thanks” I said, pulling one out tentatively and grasping for my lighter. I must have looked like a complete druggie the way I was shaking, but I hadn't had a cigarette in a day and a half. “You're way too dependant” Mr Way laughed, shaking his head. “How many do you smoke then?” I glared at him. He's probably been smoking since he was my age. “About a pack a day” he smirked. “Two if its a bad day.” How did he fit it all that in? He must sneak off for a smoke break during classes, I thought. “That's way more than me!” I laughed. He took a long drag and exhaled, opening his mouth at the same time. I was obsessed with how he did that. 

“So” he started, balancing the cigarette between his lips. “About this trip.” In all honesty, I'd completely forgotten about it. “When is that again?” I asked. He shot me irritated look. “Tomorrow” Fuck. “You'll have to make your own way to the train station, meet me there at four. Do not be late” I nodded and blew smoke up into the air. “It'll take about half an hour on the train, maybe longer. We wont be back til around eight so bring something to eat” Eight?! Eight at night? What would we be doing the whole time? I sighed. That sense of dread was coming back. I thought I'd gotten over that. I stared at him, still not able to comprehend how someone could make smoking so hot. If I wasn't already a smoker he'd probably convince me. “Your eye's looking better” I smiled. He nodded in agreement. “It's almost back to normal.” 

I had been so distracted by him that the ash had built up on the end of my cigarette and eventually dropped onto my hand, burning me. “Ah!” I yelled out, dropping it on the ground and grabbing my hand. “What is it?” Gerard asked, sounding panicked at my sudden outburst, as anyone would. “I burnt myself” I whined, a little too pathetically. He sniggered and shook his head. “You're an idiot” I looked at the damage and saw there was now a red burn on the insides of my middle finger and index finger. “Let me see” before I could protest, Mr Way had grabbed my wrist. He used his other hand to spread my palm out and examine my fingers. His hands were surprisingly soft, although he had callouses on his fingers from the years of using paintbrushes and pencils. “Yep, that's gonna blister” he said, cigarette dangling from one side of his mouth. I blushed and pulled my hand away. “S-so, I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?” I stuttered, looking up at him. He was standing close to me now, so close that I could see the embers burning at the end of his cigarette. “Yeah” he stared right back at me, his hair hanging in his face a little. I turned and picked up my bag, only stopping to stub out the cigarette I'd dropped. I didn't even get to finish it. I didn't bother saying goodbye, I just headed for the door.


	10. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank musters up the strength to go to the art show with Gerard

The next day I got up earlier than usual, despite the fact I didn't have to leave until four. I had no idea what to wear since it never crossed my mind to ask. I had pulled out all my clothes from my drawers until they were all in a crumpled pile on the floor. I decided that a black t-shirt and jeans was the way to go. I just prayed it wasn't some big fancy event. We were getting the train there, so it couldn't be that grand. I'd gotten fully dressed a whole hour and a half before I had to leave. All I could do was sit there and stare at the clock wishing time would go faster. I knew I should probably have something to eat, but I felt like I'd throw up if I ate anything. I could feel a bubbly, anxious sensation forming in the pit of my stomach. I wasn't quite sure if that was positive or just me being a nervous wreck like always. 

When the time eventually did speed up I put on a black canvas jacket and headed out. It was only just nearing the end of summer, so I didn't think I'd need anything else. The train station was only a ten minute walk from my house so I got there early to find Mr Way already there. “Wow, you're early. I never thought I'd see the day” he joked. “Ha” I said in a the most monotonous voice. “Where's Luna?” I asked, looking around to find the only other people here were a few strangers. “Oh, she couldn't make it., Called me up last minute and told me she was sick” he explained. “Looks like its just me and you” he smiled. Me and you. Mr Way and I. Fucking brilliant. He was wearing a white shirt and a blazer and clearly looked more dressed up than me. I felt pretty inadequate standing next to him in the same pair of jeans I wore every day. “Nice jacket” he said, nodding to me. “Uh, thanks.” There wasn't much to talk about while waiting for the train, we were both quiet most of the time except when Mr Way threw in a bit of dialogue here and there. I was trying to rack my brain for something to say until I realised I knew absolutely nothing about Mr Way. I knew he had a niece, he liked the Misfits, he smoked and he was an artist. I didn't even know what kind of art he specialised in. “That'll be our train.” He stepped out onto the platform as the train rumbled closer before screeching to a halt. 

The train was quite packed, which meant we both had to stand. I leaned on one of the panels dividing the carriages while Mr Way stood beside me, holding onto the handrail above him. This was not the way I would've preferred to spend half an hour. I thought of all the things I could've been doing now, having a hot bath; watching south park and stuffing my face; playing video games with Ray. I still hadn't spoken to him since we had that argument. I made a mental note to call him when I got back. I was so swept up in my thoughts that I didn't realise the train was slowing down. So thanks to physics, I went flying, right into Mr Way's arms. I'd fallen into his chest, and I would've kept falling until I hit the ground if he hadn't grabbed me around the waist with his free hand,the guy has good reflexes. “Woah, you okay?” he asked, looking down at me. I glanced up at him and realised I was pressed up against him “Y-yeah” I found my footing and stood up, fixing my dishevelled clothes. “You were on a whole other planet” He giggled. I blushed a little, still flustered by what just happened. “Sorry, I wasn't thinking.” I found the nearest hand-rail and clung to it for the rest of the journey. 

New York was a busy place, I'd go there quite often for gigs and concerts but never in the daytime. I had to be constantly aware of my surroundings or else I'd get swept up in the crowd. Everyone looked as if they had a place to be. “Keep up, Frank” Gerard said, turning round to face me. I only had short legs and they were going as fast as they could. I was practically jogging alongside him while he was only on a brisk walk. “Jeez do I need to hold you hand through this?” I hoped to god he was joking. I could never tell with him, he always had the same voice. “I'm not used to the city” I argued, getting a little out of breath “but I take it you are?” he certainly seemed to be. He had the same, stand-offish look as everyone else on the street. “I went to University here” he stated. “To the Institute of Fine Art. That's where we're going.” Why hadn't he told me that before? At least I'd found out more about him. “How long ago was that?” I asked, completely innocently. He laughed, unexpectedly. He went from cool to hysterical real fast. “How long ago do you think it was?” He must of thought I was being cheeky but in reality I just wanted to pin-point roughly how old he was. I prayed he wasn't any older than mid-thirties because being attracted to your teacher feels wrong enough. “I'm just making conversation” I mumbled, almost falling behind again. “I graduated in 1889.” He smirked. 

The further we walked the less crowded the streets became, eventually we were in a less-crowded part of town. There were still lots of people, but you could actually walk at a normal pace without being trampled by angry cosmopolitan women with phones stuck to their ears on their way to a business meeting. “Mr Way-” I started. “Just call me Gerard” he smiled and almost made me stumble over nothing. “Gerard... how much farther is it?” we'd been walking for what felt like miles and my calves were starting to burn. “Not much further now” “I hope you know where you're going” “Please, I know my way around like the back of my hand.” 

He was right though, it wasn't too far away as I noticed a few posters dotted around with 'The Institution of Art 2014' plastered across them. I could tell by the cars lined up outside too. “Here we are” Gerard smiled, nodding towards the building. It didn't look like much of a university if I was completely honest. There were shops lining the street at either side of it and I wouldn't of noticed it if I wasn't looking. There was a sign outside that matched the posters I'd seen on the way here indicating that we were at the right place. I felt Gerard's hand on my shoulder as we stepped inside. 

There were a several floors full of interconnecting rooms with a variety of art being showcased in them. There were paintings, sculptures, installations and even a few fashion designs on mannequins. I'd learnt a bit about the different art outlets in the booklet Mr Way had forced me to do. I just followed him like a lost dog while he admired the art. It was all work that had been done by students. “Isn't it just genius” he uttered. We'd been staring at the same painting for about fifteen minutes. I didn't get it, it was just a blocky portrait of some woman. Half of the stuff in this show I wouldn't give a fifth-grader a hard time about. “I don't see it” I shrugged. Everyone was looking around gaping at some of this stuff. I didn't get what the big deal was. “Oh, come on Frank” he started. “The way he's painted this, you could tell he's been inspired by Picasso. He liked to paint people from different angles, all mashed up into one portrait” he stared longingly at it. He spoke about it as if it was the most fascinating thing in the world. I had to admire his passion, I didn't think I got that excited about anything in my life. It was mesmerising the way he explained things so vividly. “Do you see what I mean?” he said, finally looking at me. My cluelessness must have shown in my face because he just sighed and shook his head. “What about this one over here” he said, pulling me over by the arm to a sculpture in the centre of the room. “What about it?” It was a big hunk of metal, about six feet tall, bent and welded into what very vaguely resembled a man kneeling. “What do you see?” he asked. “A man?” I wasn't sure what he was trying to prove. “Exactly, but could it be something else? Everything has been done for a reason Frank. Whenever an artist puts something somewhere, its deliberate. Think about why they made it like this” he emphasised. I turned to look at it again, doing as Gerard said and thinking as if I were the artist. I glanced back at Gerard, who had been staring at me eagerly. “I guess I see what he was trying to do...” I shrugged. He nodded and urged me on. “Well, it doesn't really look like a man once you think about it, but you can tell what it is. It's all like...” I was never good at explaining things and him standing there was making me nervous. “There you go” he smiled, putting a hand on my shoulder. “You finally got it” he laughed. I couldn't help but blush. “Now, you wanna see something really cool?” he grinned giddily. “What?” Before I knew it, Gerard was heading off in the other direction. I hurried to catch up with him but I was having trouble trying to dodge people. “Come on!” he grinned, putting his arm round my shoulders and guiding me through the crowd. He was so warm and his arm around me was so comforting. I felt completely safe like that. 

He lead me out of the room and over to the stairwell. “Where are we going?” I looked up at him but his eyes were fixed on the stairs ahead. “You'll see” he smiled, taking his arm back and walking ahead of me. The cold in the corridor became all too apparent when his arm wasn't there. He started climbing the stairs as if he were on a mission, holding onto the handrail. “We're not allowed to go up there!” I hissed, looking around nervously in case someone saw. “Come on, where's your sense of adventure?” he called, turning around and shooting me a toothy smile. His hair was a mess and hanging in his eyes and made him look all the more attractive. I had to follow him, whether I wanted to or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy new year, I've broken up this into two chapters because it was getting a bit long, so here is a slightly longer chapter. Expect the next one soon


	11. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank unintentionally upsets Gerard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in case you didn't know, 'The Breakfast Monkey' was actually a children's cartoon that Gerard Way made before MCR. I believe he worked at CN at the time but I'm not entirely sure, you can watch it here:   
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnt__lyGIQ4  
> Gerard sounds completely ridiculous in it

I didn't have time to catch my breath when we arrived at the top of the stairs. Gerard was off like a shot down the corridor again, leaving me behind, keeled over and gasping for breath. I really needed to cut down on smoking. “Hey, wait” I croaked, making him turn around. “Jeez, you are so unhealthy” he laughed. “We're not supposed to be up here” I said, regaining my composure. There were no lights on and the place was still. The only thing illuminating the room was the big glass window at the end of the corridor which let in a pale glow from the sky outside. “I wanna show you something” he whispered, before turning and walking further down the corridor, scanning the walls. “What are you looking for?” There were frames lining each side of the corridor, each with a different drawing in them. There were little plastic plaques underneath with the name and the artist. Some of them were abstract, some were incredibly detailed life drawings, and some were just one-of-a-kind. But each and every one of them was incredible. I had been gawking at one when Gerard jumped up in delight. “Frank! Come see, quick!” he called, grinning to himself. I pulled my eyes away from the hyper-realistic drawing of a bird and went over. He was standing in front of a medium-sized frame. The picture itself was of a small monkey in a white coat and red beret, holding a plate of waffles. I bent down and squinted at the nameplate. 

'Gerard Way – The Breakfast Monkey – 2003'. 

He must have been in his twenties in 2003. I could only have been about six. The thought made me feel so odd. He was already so accomplished before I'd even learned to ride a bike. I turned round to see his expression had changed. “The Breakfast Monkey?” I smirked. “Yeah” he nodded “He's a monkey with the power of conjuring breakfast food. I made him up for an animation project” Of course he was. I had no idea Gerard had such an active imagination. “He almost got his own TV show too.” “What?!” I exclaimed, glancing back at the little monkey. “Yeah” he sighed. “I was working at Cartoon Network on the side, just a part time job y'know, So I decided to pitch it to a group of executives” his voice had changed from giddy to melancholic. “What happened?” I asked. “Well it wasn't good enough I guess” he shrugged. His eyes looked vacant, like he was lost in his train of thought. All these memories must have been rushing back to him now. I wanted to say something to cheer him up, but “I like it” was the only thing I could think of. “It's cute” I smiled encouragingly and nudged his arm with my elbow. His smile started to return and he looked down at me. “Thanks.” It probably didn't mean a lot to him, but at least I'd got him to stop frowning. “We should get out of here” I said as my anxiety came flooding back. “Don't be so scared, I'm an alumni, I practically own this place” he laughed. “Seriously, I don't wanna get caught” I whined, pulling on his arm. “Alright, I guess so. We've seen everything we need to see” he agreed and allowed me to drag him back over to the stairs.

I couldn't help but smile to myself when we were standing outside. I'd learned a lot about Gerard in one day, and I'd got to see some of his artwork. I didn't realise that some of his past had been so heartbreaking though. “What are you so happy about?” Gerard said, breaking the comfortable silence. “Nothing” His face was glowing orange from the street lamp we were under and his hair was still a mess. “Right” he put his cigarette back between his lips. I folded my arms in front of me, hugging my jacket closer to my body. It was a cold night for August, I really should of worn something thicker, the jacket I had on was a glorified piece of fabric, with barely any lining or insulation. “Are you cold?” I shook my head, but my juddering made it pretty obvious. “Do you want my jacket?” he asked, already starting to take his blazer off. “No, no then you wont have anything” I said, stepping away from him. “I'm not even cold” he said, draping it around me and leaving him in just a shirt and trousers. It was still warm from his body (like I said, the dude was like a radiator) and it was too big for me. “Why aren't you cold then?” I glared up at him. “It's probably cause you're just really scrawny” he smirked, smoke billowing from his mouth as he talked. “S-shut up” I tried sounding serious but I couldn't stop my teeth from chattering. “When is our train?” I had been anxious throughout this whole trip and I didn't feel like being stuck in New York for the night with Mr Way. “We've still got about forty minutes, we'll head to the train station after this” he said, pulling back his sleeve to check his watch. “I hope this has been eye-opening for you” he started saying something about the trip but I was having a hard time paying attention because of how fucking beautiful he looked at that moment. That lighting, outfit and hair were all doing him justice and I found myself inching a little bit closer to him. His lips were moving but all I could hear was white noise. It was like a movie, everything else stood still and all the background noise faded away. I couldn't remember how long he'd been talking before he noticed I hadn't been paying any attention.

“Why do you always stare at me like that?” 

“Like what?” 

“Like that.” 

He took the cigarette from between his lips and fiddled with it between his fingers. “You always have that look on your face, it makes you look dumb” he had no expression in his voice so I couldn't tell if he was joking or not. “I'm not dumb!” I retorted. “You look it when you give me that stare” “I don't know what you're talking about” I was beginning to turn red. “When your mouth is hanging open and your eyes are all glazed over. You're almost drooling” he could tell this was bothering me. He was being deliberately irritating but I was too wound up and embarrassed to realise. “I am not!” I pouted. He sniggered and shook his head again. I hated when he dismissed me like that. “Don't treat me like a little kid” “But you are a kid” he was staring me down now, trying to make me squirm under his gaze. “Shut up” I uttered. “Make me.” My eyes met his. Whenever someone says 'make me' there's only one thing I could possibly think of doing. He broke out into a smirk and took a step closer “go on, make me” he repeated. My whole chest constricted and my cheeks had turned completely red. He couldn't possibly mean what I thought he did. He gazed down at me, taking a drag of his cigarette and holding the smoke in his lungs. He was so close to me now, so close that our faces were inches apart. He blew the smoke in my face, his eyes half closing in the process. God, why was that so attractive? “You can't do it, can you?” he uttered, his voice low and raspy. “You've not got the guts.” I hated this. I hated the way he was always so confident while I wasn't, I hated the way he could make me feel so full of rage and so helpless at the same time and I hated how hard I was blushing. All because of him. I so desperately wanted to prove him wrong. I could practically hear the blood pumping through my body I was so tense. 

For one crazy moment I thought of grabbing him right then and there, for the whole world to see. But before I could think twice, he stood up straight and turned away, going back to looking across the street. I felt my heart sink a little but some of the weight on my chest was relieved and I let out a breath I didn't realise I was holding in. “It's time to go now” Gerard stated, flicking his cigarette on the ground. I couldn't see his face because he'd turned away, but I could tell from his voice he wasn't smiling any more. “Let's get going” he didn't wait for a response, he just turned and started walking down the street. It was like a blow to the stomach, and for some reason I felt incredibly guilty. After a few steps he turned back to me and I saw his face clearly enough to tell he was pissed off. “Frank! Move.” he yelled. I felt tears pricking my eyes but I used all my willpower to not let it show. I scurried up behind him and we walked the rest of the journey in silence.


	12. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank realizes he's the jealous type.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Sorry I haven't updated in a day or two, I've been busy with essays and revision for school and being with my family. I've also been working on a different Frank/Gerard fic that i'll be posting in a few days. So enjoy!

Ray didn't notice me as I walked into Chemistry on Monday. I bit my lip and slowly made my way to my desk, staring at him the whole time. When I sat in my seat, he finally looked up. “Frank” he said, tapping me on the shoulder. I took a deep breath and prepared for the worst, but when I turned around he just looked sad. “Where have you been man?” he asked, his voice going low so no-one else heard. Thankfully everyone was still taking out their textbooks and putting their bags away. “Uh, sorry... I've been busy” was all I could say. I didn't want to admit that I'd been avoiding him to go sneak off with Mr Way. “I tried calling you last night but it went to voice mail” he said. “My phone ran out of battery” I mumbled, not making eye contact. I wasn't lying. It had ran out of battery while I was in New York, but I hadn't noticed because as soon as I got home I locked myself in my room and cried myself to sleep. I was so emotional lately. When I was sad, I was really sad and when I was anxious, I was a nervous wreck. I was barely happy anymore. Sure, there were times when I was content, but it didn't last long. Maybe it was just my hormones. “Frank, you're doing it again” Ray sighed. “What?” I glanced back up at him. He just shook his head. “Mr Iero, eyes to the front please” the teacher called in a nasally monotone. I rolled my eyes and sighed and spun back round in my chair. 

I sat with Ray again at lunch. I was glad we'd made up because I didn't know if Gerard was still angry at me, and I didn't feel like talking to him again after he'd made me cry last night. It was strange, I'd never cried over people before, why did I get so worked up over Mr Way. “Do you wanna come to the movies after school?” Ray asked, biting into his sandwich. I really didn't have much money at the moment, but I could use the distraction. “Sure” I nodded. Ray and I hadn't actually gone out and done anything in so long, so it would be refreshing to get out of the house. “Hannah's coming.” he added. I turned round and shot Ray a puzzled look before I realised. “Your girlfriend?” He nodded, chewing a mouthful of bread. “Uuugh!” I huffed a little too dramatically. “Oh come on” Ray said, spitting crumbs out of his mouth. “She's fucking cool, you'll like her!” he protested. I shot him a venomous look before sighing again. “Fiiine.” “Good.” I really hoped this wouldn't become a regular thing. I didn't want some girl to be constantly around when I was trying to spend time with Ray. I didn't usually think of myself as the jealous type, maybe it was the hormones again.

I second-guessed myself when I actually met Hannah. “Hi” she smiled when she approached us at the bus station. “Hey” Ray grinned like an idiot before placing a kiss on her cheek. I winced, once you'd seen a guy passed out, drunk, covered in dorito dust and his own puke; you can't see the guy being intimate in any way. “Lets go” I grumbled, noticing she had a nose ring and lip ring. I'd always wanted those two piercings. She suggested we go get something to eat when we got there. It was really odd to find a girl round here who wasn't afraid to show basic bodily functions like eating. So, over a lunch of burger and fries we discussed comics, bands and TV shows. I hated to admit it, but Ray was right. The girl was cool. If I'd liked girls, I'd probably hate Ray for getting to her first. “Are you single, Frank?” Hannah asked, changing the topic of conversation. “Oh...” I started, looking between her and Ray, not sure what to say. “Yeah” Ray smirked. “I've got a friend...” she began. Oh no, I was definitely not straight and I was definitely not looking for a relationship. “I uh, I dunno” I blushed, running a hand through my hair. “Oh come on, Frank” Ray protested “You're so miserable all the time, maybe it'd do you good.” Why didn't Ray just shut the fuck up. This was partly my fault for not telling him I was gay, but he was still being incredibly rude. “She's pretty, I swear, let me show you a picture” Hannah assured, pulling out her phone. How was I going to get out of this one. She pulled up a picture of her and showed me. The girl had dyed blue hair and heavy eyeliner round her eyes. “She's pretty, right?” Hannah smiled encouragingly. I guess she was? I didn't really know what made a girl pretty or not, she had a proportionate face? I couldn't think of any excuse to politely decline. “Well, I'll think about it” I shrugged, running a hand through my hair nervously, I wonder if she could tell I had no intention of meeting up with her friend ever. 

I was expecting to be completely uncomfortable throughout the whole movie because of Ray and Hannah, but they'd managed to keep their public displays of affection to a minimum. I was so glad I could focus on the film and get away from my thoughts for a while. Afterwards, I'd completely forgotten about everything that was worrying me. “What time is it?” Ray asked as we wandered through the mall with no purpose or direction. “It's only five” Hannah replied. It wasn't too busy that day, so we could sit down on a bench without having to share with some random elderly person. Ray and Hannah kicked up a conversation about the film we'd just seen. I was about to join in when I saw a familiar face at the other side of the complex. I did a double take before I realised who it was. 

“Ray! Look, look! - Its Gerard” I exclaimed, grabbing him by the shoulders. “What!? - Who?” he said, surprised at my sudden burst of emotion. “Mr Way! Over there” I pointed over at him, it was at that point I noticed who he was with. “Oh shit, it is” Ray laughed. My face fell, he was walking alongside a particularly skinny looking man with glasses and messy brown hair. They were both holding shopping bags and Gerard was talking and smiling. “Who's that he's with?” Ray asked “I had him last year for art” Hannah added. If Gerard were to look over at that moment he'd see all three of us gawking at him. Then suddenly, I felt as if my heart had been torn right out of my chest. Gerard reached over, putting his arm around the shorter man's shoulder, and kissed the top of his head. “Oh my fucking god!” Ray squealed, jumping up and down in his seat restlessly. “What!?” Hannah asked, confused as to why he was so giddy. “I fucking knew it!” Ray laughed, grabbing my shoulders and shaking me. The man with the glasses smiled and pushed Gerard away, fixing his hair. “Shut up!” I growled, shrinking away from my friend. My chest ached, I felt hollow. I wasn't even sure why, Mr Way was a grown man, he wasn't going to think of me in that way. All those things I'd thought were 'passes' at me were probably him just being a dick, like always. I wanted to cry all over again, Just when I was starting to feel better. Why the fuck did he always turn up and ruin everything. 

“We should follow him!” Ray exclaimed when he'd disappeared from sight. “No!” Hannah protested, pulling Ray back down into his seat “that's just creepy” “Oh come on, he's in public, I can't help it if he happens to be in the same place as me!” “Our bus comes in a little while, we don't have time.” Ray sighed and sunk back into the bench, defeated, then finally looked at me. “You alright man?” he asked, switching from joking to concerned. “No” I mumbled. “What?” he hadn't heard me. “I said yeah.” Ray and I couldn't talk about 'feelings' to each other. That wasn't a thing that guys could do. Sometimes I envied the friendships that girls had. I saw them in TV shows and movies all the time, it seemed so open. At that point, I felt I had no one in the world that I could talk to. “Let's just go” I said, getting up. “Our bus isn't for another ten minutes” Hannah said. “Well we can wait at the bus stop” I said, heading out of the mall. I saw the two exchange a confused look before they got up to follow me.


	13. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard tries to admit something

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This work is almost to 1000 hits! I'm so overjoyed with the success of this story so far, and I'm sorry I haven't updated as frequently, I know you'll understand. I've been working on a oneshot and I'm thinking of starting another series, so feel free to check that out when I put it out if you guys are interested.

I tried avoiding eye contact with Mr Way as I entered his class the next day, which was difficult as I had to walk past his desk. I'm pretty sure I saw him glance over from the corner of my eye, but I couldn't be sure. I dumped my bag down on the floor and pulled out my pencil like every other day. I promised myself I'd try to get some actual work done, I needed to start my project. I was about to grab a piece of paper and start drawing when I realised I didn't have anything to work from. I cursed to myself as I realised I'd need to go and ask Mr Way for some pictures to draw from. I glanced over at him, he was hunched over his desk working on his own drawing. I scraped back my chair and stood up, making my way timidly over to his desk. 

“Uh, sir?” I mumbled, approaching him and standing by his side. He didn't react, just continued scribbling on his paper furiously. I glanced around the room, no, I hadn't suddenly turned invisible. “Sir” I repeated again, louder this time. He held up one hand, gesturing for me to hold on one minute. He couldn't be bothered to open his mouth and say two words? Even to someone like me, that was rude. He finished shading in a piece of hair on the face he was drawing then spun round, looking at me expectantly. “I uh, need something to draw from” I uttered, looking at the floor. “Why don't you look at me when you talk to me and maybe I'll consider it” he stated, raising his eyebrows. Who'd pissed in his cornflakes this morning? Why did he have a giant stick up his ass all of a sudden. I glared at him through half-lidded eyes, I really couldn't be bothered with his shit today. “I need pictures to draw from.” I stated, less politely this time. I heard Gerard take in a sharp breath before turning round in his chair again. He typed something into the keyboard forcefully before slamming the enter key to search for images. I looked around to see if anyone had noticed, a few people had glanced over, but went back to their work. “What's up with you today?” I whispered harshly in his ear. “Nothings 'up' with me” he huffed, using his normal volume so people could hear him loud and clear. I looked around nervously, hoping no one was paying attention. Was he intentionally trying to embarrass me? “Doesn't seem like it” I mumbled under my breath. “What?” Gerard spun round again, looking straight at me with the most offended expression. “Nothing!” I spat defensively. “If you've got something to say to me then just fucking say it!” Gerard yelled, his voice raising suddenly and stunning not only me, but everyone else in the room. I was hurt, there was no reason for him to be acting so passive aggressive, what had I done? “Do you need me to send you out again?!” he continued, leaning forward so I could feel his breath on my face as he yelled. “No! I'll go my fucking self!” I screamed, collecting my bag and storming out the room. 

I didn't know where I was going to go. All I knew was I had no intention of going back there. I thought of going to Mrs Lattison's office and begging her to let me drop the subject. I never wanted to see Mr Way's face again. Even if I did, I'd still see him around school. He had a way of doing that, popping up in my life when I didn't want him there. I'd made it out of the art department and was heading down the hallway in the direction of the management corridor when I heard footsteps behind me. “Frank! Stop!” Mr Way called. He was running after me, actually running. “Stop!” he called, I heard him getting closer and tried to speed up but he grabbed my shoulder. “Don't touch me!” I cried out, batting his hand away from me. His hair was a mess and he was slightly red in the face from chasing me. I looked up at him, he looked shocked. I guess the way I'd just exploded came as a bit of a surprise. That look sent me over the edge, I couldn't take it any more. All the frustration I'd bottled up over the past few weeks just spilled over. I burst into tears, my whole body shaking with sobs. Gerard stared at me, confused and shocked and all-round unsure of what to do. Now he had a sobbing teenager to take care of. “Frank..” he said softly. I put my head in my hands, not wanting him to see me blubbering. “Look, lets go somewhere quieter, yeah?” he suggested, putting a hand on my shoulder to guide me out of the middle of the hallway. 

He put an arm round my shoulders, which were now shaking, and lead me through a set of double doors to the place we usually went. He pushed open the fire door and lead me outside. “Right” he began, taking his arm away. But before he could go on I threw my arms round him and pressed my face into his chest, starting to wail. “I-I'm s-orry” I whimpered, struggling to get the words out since I was sobbing so hard. I was probably getting his shirt wet and this was definitely not appropriate to do with your teacher, but my emotions had clouded my sense of perception at that point. “Sorry for what?” he asked, putting a hand on the back of my head and stroking my hair. I sniffed and wiped my cheek “for making you angry” I snivelled pathetically. His hand on my hair was surprisingly comforting, and his chest was warm and his arms around me made me feel so safe. I could of stayed like that forever. “You didn't make me angry” he said. “Well, I was angry, but I shouldn't of been... I was just being childish” he confessed. I looked up at him with puffy red eyes and tear stains still on my cheeks, I must of looked like a blubbering mess. “Why were you angry?” I asked nervously. I genuinely didn't have a clue, I knew I must of said something during the trip that upset him, was it because I asked him about his past?

“It's stupid” he uttered, shaking his head and looking away from me. I let go of him and took a step back so he could see me properly. “I have to know so that I don't do it again” I protested. “It's nothing” Mr Way grumbled. He was looking at the ground now, something I'd never seen him do. It was like a complete role-reversal, I was the one pressing him for information and he couldn't make eye contact with me. “I want to know” I said, stepping into his line of sight so our eyes met again. “Tell me.” His eyes stared into mine, before glancing down at my lips. My heart skipped a beat and I felt my cheeks start to get redder. “It was when we were outside, at the art show” he began. I nodded encouragingly. He bit his lip and looked away, breaking eye contact. “I can't-” he muttered, shaking his head “I can't tell you, it's ridiculous.” “Oh come on” I put my hand on his upper arm. He sighed and continued without looking at me “You were just so...” he took a deep breath “so different, y'know. I started catching these feelings that are completely inappropriate.” My chest was so tight to the point where I could barely take a breath. I couldn't believe the words coming out of his mouth. If I could move, I would've pinched myself, but I was frozen in place from shock. My heart was pounding against my ribs as if it was about to punch through my chest at any moment. I was impatiently waiting for what he was going to say next but he was struggling to continue his sentence. He lifted his head and finally turned to me and I could see exactly how terrified he was. I'd never seen him like that before. “Frank, I...” he paused and took another breath, but before he could open his mouth again, the fire door swung open.

“Mr Way!” It was Mrs Lattison, and she looked furious. “What are you doing leaving your class unattended in the middle of a lesson!?” she yelled. Her eyes looked as though they could actually pierce through Mr Way. “I'm so sorry, Miss, I was trying to handle this situation with Frank, he's a bit emotional” he explained, grasping desperately for the right words. Her eyes switched over to me, making me quiver. “Has he been misbehaving?” she asked, her voice lowering but still not losing its fierceness. “No! No, he's just, um.. well, he needed a moment.” he assured her. She looked back at Gerard and shook her head. “You and I are going to have to talk about this later, Sir.” she warned. “Okay miss, I'll go back now” he nodded. She gave us both another terrifying stare before finally leaving. 

I let out a sigh of relief and let my eyes slip closed. Had she happened to walk by a minute earlier she would've stumbled into a whole other situation. “We really should get back” Mr Way said, heading over to the door and pushing it open. “But you were just saying...” I whined. “I'll lose my job if I don't do what she says, come on, move” he said, holding the door open for me. I scurried behind him, slightly disappointed that the moment was ruined. He was about to admit something huge, I could tell. He wouldn't be terrified over nothing. The idea of what he could of possibly said would be playing on my mind all day.


	14. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank admits something.

It was horrible keeping all my thoughts to myself, because nowadays all those thoughts seemed to be about Gerard. I was sitting at the bench at lunch, tapping my foot impatiently and looking up at the sky. I didn't realise how much time was passing because I'd been so lost in my own thoughts. I only noticed something was wrong when Hannah turned up. “Where's Ray?” I asked, looking around for that familiar mop of hair. “He's still in music, he has to finish up an exam” she said, sitting herself down next to me “he told me to tell you.” “Oh.” I noticed she'd dyed her hair, not that it was hard, it was bright green. I wished I'd had the guts to dye my hair a crazy colour, then again I could barely decide which pair of black jeans to wear every morning, let alone something as permanent as that. 

“What's up?” She asked, cocking her head to the side and squinting. I sighed, deciding to tell her the truth, lying was too much effort. “I've just got a lot on my mind.” She nodded understandingly and went quiet for a moment. “Can I ask what?” She said, looking at me expectantly. I bit my lip and looked at the concrete littered with cigarette butts. I wanted someone to talk to, now here they were. I just needed to figure out how to phrase it in a way that didn't make me sound crazy. “I... I like someone” I uttered, looking at her for a reaction. She broke into a smile “thats great!” It didn't really feel great to be honest. “You don't look very happy?” she questioned, raising an eyebrow. It's as if she was a mind reader. “Is that not a good thing?” she asked. I shrugged “I'm not supposed to like them” I admitted. How much was I going to confess to this girl? God she was good at this, she was getting me to say things I'd never dare to admit to anyone. “How come? If it feels right then it's right, isn't it?” she said. “Look” I began, biting my lip. “I'm just gonna be honest, I'm gay.” She froze suddenly, her mouth falling open and her eyes going wide “Oh... Ray never told me that” she said. I sighed and shook my head “I shouldn't of told you.” “No, no!” she protested, putting a hand on my shoulder. Why did everyone do that to me? “I don't have a problem with that, it's just I wish you'd told me before I went telling my friend about you” she explained. “You're the first person I've told” I confessed. She smiled a little and squeezes my shoulder. “Really?... well then I'm honoured.” I had to admit, I felt that a little bit of pressure had eased off my chest after admitting that. It was only Hannah, but at least it was someone. “I don't know how to tell Ray” I mumbled, covering my face with my hands. “Ray's your best friend, he'll accept it. He's a pretty open-minded guy” she assured me, taking her hand away. She was right, Ray was laid back. He probably wouldn't give a shit whether I was gay or not, I just didn't know how to bring it up. Surely I should admit it to him if I admitted it to his girlfriend. 

I invited Ray over to mine that night to play video games. We were both sitting on my living room floor in front of the TV, halfway through a particularly difficult level of The Walking Dead. The screen flashed red for what felt like the hundredth time and Ray cried out in anger. “Fuck this piece of shit!” he growled, throwing the controller down in defeat. “I'm getting a fucking drink” he announced, getting up and heading into the kitchen. I realised now was probably my only chance to talk to him before we were launched into another few rounds of the game. We'd been swept up in the game for hours and I had no idea how much longer the next levels would take. “Ray” I said when he came back from the kitchen with two cans of coke. “Yeah?” he said, sitting down and reaching for the controller again. “Don't, just leave it for now” I said, taking the controller from him and putting it back down. He looked at me with a puzzled expression. “What is it?” he asked. I took a deep breath and thought for a moment, trying to get the words together. “I need to tell you something” that only made him more confused and worried, he furrowed his brows and narrowed his eyes at me. I could tell he was recounting everything he'd said and done in the past three years he'd known me wondering what he could've possibly done wrong. “I'm gay” I said, forcing the words out, knowing that if I hesitated I'd probably back out of it. “Okay” he said, his eyes still narrowed. He looked suspicious of me. “What?” I asked nervously. “Why haven't you told me before?” he asked. I just shrugged. He stared at me in silence for a few moments before his face returned to normal. “So are we gonna finish this level or what?” he said, as if the last minute had never happened. I let out a sigh but couldn't help but smile at that idiot's face. “Sure” I nodded, picking up my controller and preparing for another attempt at this level.

Coming out to Ray was easier than I thought, but I still hadn't told him about Mr Way. There had been a few questionable incidents between us. I laid in bed that night going over everything that had happened between Gerard and I. I knew how unlikely it was, but a tiny part of me wished that the 'inappropriate feelings' he confessed to the other day were towards me. All that picking on me and calling me out had to count towards something, right? I rolled over and buried my face in the pillow. My body was so tense and my whole back ached. I remembered how Gerard's arms felt around me, how he smelt like detergent and coffee and cigarettes and how his chest was so warm and comforting. That's all I wanted at that moment. I needed to be held. I'd never felt so hopeless in my life, I was starting to sound like a pathetic little girl. I couldn't get over how much I really genuinely liked Mr Way. I'd finally admitted it to myself, maybe that was the first step to getting over him. 

There was some weird mixture of anxiety and excitement in he pit of my stomach as I walked to art the next day. I hadn't seen Gerard since Mrs Lattison interrupted him the other day and I needed to know what he was going to say. All those feelings started bubbling up as I entered the art corridor and I sped up when I saw his door. I hurried over and pushed it open, but I stopped in my tracks when I saw who was there. It wasn't Gerard sitting behind his desk, but a blonde-haired woman, tapping away at the keyboard rhythmically. I stared at her for a few seconds unblinkingly until she finally turned around. “You must be Frank?” she said. I nodded and walked over to my desk, not taking my eyes off her. I knew who she was, I'd seen her around school before. I was pretty sure she was a Geography teacher, Miss Wells or Wills or something. Where the hell was Gerard? Was she going to be with us the whole period? “I'm gonna ignore the fact that you're late” she droned, continuing what she was doing. “I assume you all have work to do?” she raised her voice, addressing the whole class. She got no answer but everyone had established what they were doing for the day, it was a pretty self-sustaining environment. “Good.” she sighed, pulling out a folder and opening it. “Where's Mr Way?” I asked. She tore her eyes away at the screen and looked at me. “Well he's clearly not here is he?” she retorted. I glared at her in response and held my tongue, I didn't want to get kicked out after all. 

I scanned his desk, looking for any clue as to where he was. The desk was relatively clear – when I say that I mean there was no work lying open, it was still cluttered with pens and pencils and stacks of paper. His coat and bag wasn't there either. A wave of nausea hit me as the thought of him being fired hit me. I put my hand out on the table to steady myself. What if I'd gotten him fired when he ran after me that day? I didn't want it to be true, but it was a possibility. What if Mrs Lattison had seen me hugging him? What if he'd admitted it? A panic swept over me and I prayed that I was just overreacting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to add more to this chapter but I decided it was enough on its own and I enjoy making you all wait for more 
> 
> don't worry, I'm already onto the next one and I'll upload it when it's done


	15. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank confronts Gerard and asks him to finish what he said the other day.

I'd managed to calm myself down enough to get some work done. I used my phone to google some pictures of models to work from. The cover teacher didn't seem to give a shit so it worked for now. I felt myself finally start to calm down when I heard the sound of footsteps nearing the door. My head shot up just as Mr Way walked through the door. He looked like utter shit. His hair was a tangled mess and he had heavy bags under his eyes. He whispered something to the teacher and she nodded and gathered up her stuff and left. He put his leather messenger bag on the floor and took his coat off and I noticed his shirt wasn't tucked in right. He must of just clocked in. He looked like he'd only just woke up. He didn't say anything to the class, he just sat down and started to pull out his work. I was glad he wasn't fired, but I was still concerned. He looked like he hadn't got a bit of sleep last night. 

He didn't say anything through the whole lesson. When the bell rang for lunch, I waited until everyone had left and walked over to him. “Are you okay?” I asked timidly. He turned round and smiled drowily “I'm fine” his voice was hoarse and dry. “You don't look it” I said bluntly, making him snigger a little. In all honesty, he looked stoned. His eyes were half lidded and bloodshot and his voice was hoarse. “I didn't sleep very well” he said. “Oh.” There was an awkward silence. For once, neither of us had anything to say. I wanted to ask him about yesterday, I so desperately needed to know what he said. “I'm sorry about yesterday” he sighed, leaning his head against his hand and rubbing his temple. “It's okay” I said, picking at the skin round my nails. “I was gonna ask...” I bit my lip. “If you could tell me what you were gonna say.” I peered up at him through the hair hanging in my face. “That's why I couldn't sleep last night” he said blatantly. Did that mean he was thinking about me? He sighed and looked into my eyes. “Look, Frank I can't tell you what's on my mind” he admitted. “I don't want to be put in a position where my job is at risk. I was so disappointed, how could he just brush me off so easily like that. “What?” I whined. He stood up and walked past me, going over to the sink and picking up a pot of paint brushes. “I don't have anything else to say on the subject.” he said matter-of-factly in his aficianado voice, as if I was any other student. I was hurt, as stupid as it sounded I thought I was more than that. I was certainly closer to him than any other student was. I wasn't going to let him brush me off that easily. 

“What do you mean you've nothing else to say, you seemed like you had plenty yesterday!” I protested, walking over to him. He'd rolled up his sleeves and turned on the tap and was proceeding to clean the paintbrushes, kneading the bristles through his fingers and wiping them on a damp cloth. “Yesterday I wasn't thinking straight” he avoided eye contact, pretending to be completely absorbed in what he was doing. “I heard the start of what you were gonna say, now why don't you finish it?” I said, raising my voice slightly. Gerard's actions became more frantic and he started throwing the paintbrushes down in a pile after he'd cleaned each one. “I've got lots to do, I'm already late, my day's been bad enough” he was hinting at me to leave, I deliberately ignored it. “Are you scared I'm gonna react badly or something?” I pressed, I was the one irritating him now. “Cause I promise I wont, And I wont run off and tell anyone” Gerard was practically tearing the bristles off the brushes at this point and he was getting water on his shirt. “I just want to know-” 

Before I could say anything else Gerard threw the brush he was holding across the room, hitting something else and hitting the ground. He turned and glared down at me. I stuttered and trailed off, his stare stopping me in my tracks. I shook it off then cleared my throat and continued. “I think I have a right to know.” He took a few steps closer, never breaking that cold stare. Instinctively, I took a few steps back, dropping my bag in the process. He didn't stop, he kept walking towards me until there was no more space left for me to back into and my back pressed up against the wall. I watched as he put his hands on the wall above my shoulders and leaned in close so our faces were inches apart. 

For a moment he just stared, looking slightly pissed off, but contained. “You really wanna know?” he said in that low voice of his. My heart was thumping in my chest again and I had no idea what I'd gotten myself into. I couldn't reply, for fear of saying the wrong thing. Strangely enough, it was way more terrifying seeing him calm like this than it was when he yelled. I could still tell he was angry but he wasn't showing it. I saw his eyes scan down my body before making eye contact again. “You have no idea what you do to me” he murmored. “What?” I managed to choke out before he continued. “You're all I've been able to think about for so long.” This was all I'd hoped for, yet I couldn't be more terrified. I wanted to reach out and touch him but that stare of his had me frozen on the spot. “I can't concentrate when you're around” his voice was becoming slightly more aggravated and he took a deep breath “I can't think about one of my students like this” he sighed. 

He went to turn away, but I put my hand on his shoulder, making his head snap back around at me. “Don't.” I mumbled. He looked at me questioningly. “You don't have to feel bad about it” I said, staring into his eyes. “I feel like that too” I realised how hard I was holding onto him, but I didn't want to let go unless he slipped away. “I don't think its wrong” I gushed. It seemed that letting out my feelings was way easier than I thought. “It is wrong.” he stated and tried to stand up again. I put my other hand on his shoulder, so now I was standing with both hands on his upper arms. “If it feels right, then its right, isn't it?” I said, taking a deep breath. I saw his eyes stray downwards again, I knew what that meant, I just didn't have the guts to initiate it. All my sense of time had gone and I wasn't sure how long we'd been standing like that. I wasn't even sure if he wanted to initiate anything. I was so terrified of doing the wrong thing, but I knew if I didn't do something now, I'd never get the chance again.

So I started off subtly, by moving my hands ever so slowly up his forearms and over his shoulders, draping them round his neck. He took this as a sign to move slightly closer. Our noses were only inches apart now and all I could hear was the blood pumping through my veins and my own ragged breathing. “Is that okay?” I asked, making sure we were on the same page. He nodded, his eyes glancing down every few moments. We both stared at each other, waiting for the other to make the next move. I glanced down at his lips through half-lidded eyes. He had some stubble on his upper lip but they still looked enticing. He moved forward, tilting his head to the side. Our noses were almost touching now and the suspense was killing me. “Is this okay?” he asked, moving one hand from the wall to my waist. I didn't answer, I just pulled him down by the back of his neck, closing the space left between us and pressing our lips together. 

Everything else was a blur, I was so aware of his lips against mine and his hand on my waist and that pounding in my chest. I felt his stubble against my chin. It scraped along my skin a little but strangely, I liked it. His hand creeped round to my lower back. My head was fuzzy, I was in utter awe that this was real, that this was happening, that it was happening to me. I was terrified that I'd wake up and realise it was all a dream, but it felt all too real. Then, it was gone, his mouth was no longer against mine. I didn't like that, we hadn't been kissing for very long and now it was over. “Wha?” I said drowsily, still stunned from that kiss. “Was that okay?” he asked, looking extremely concerned. “Yeah, do it again” I said. I didn't even have to ask because his lips were already on mine again. A whimper escaped from my throat, something I would've been embarrassed about had I not been so swept up in the moment. He stepped closer to me so our chests were almost together, but he was taller than me so I had to stand up on my tiptoes to reach him. I felt both of his hands wrap round my waist, pulling me closer to I was up against him. I wanted so be so much closer but no matter how much I pressed against him I didn't feel close enough. I let out a breath that I didn't realise I'd been holding in and he pulled away again. 

“This isn't right” he said. My heart sank and I thought he was going to back out of it again until he followed it up with “You're too short.” He grabbed me and pulled me over to the counter next to the sink. “Get up on this” he ordered. I did as he said and hopped up on the counter, before I could ask what he was doing he pulled me forward so my legs were round his waist and kissed me again. Before this, I'd never kissed anyone. Now I had Mr Way between my legs. I put my arms round his shoulders again and tilted my head, getting a better angle. I was so swept away with desire that I wasn't thinking straight. This wasn't anything like me, If he'd tried to do this a week or two ago I'd have shoved him off or ran off crying. So why did I have my hand on the back of his head, pulling him closer? I felt his hands on my hips, pulling me forward every now and then. I could feel his belt buckle against the front of my trousers, this was definitely going way too fast. I just prayed to god that I didn't get a hard-on.“Is this alright?” he panted, breaking away for a split second. “Yes” I breathed, pulling him back in by his collar. I'd wanted this for so long, I'm not sure if I pictured it quite like this, with my crotch pressed against his abdomen, but it was still him. I broke out of my trance when I felt his tongue running along my bottom lip. I let my mouth open slightly, not thinking over what I'd just agreed to do, when his tongue entered my mouth, subtly enough so I didn't notice at first, Until a few minutes later I realised, WOW, that's Mr Way's tongue in my mouth. I never wanted it to end, but sure enough, the bell for the end of lunch went, making us both jump out of our skin.

He pulled away, blinking a few times and trying to get his brain to function properly. His hair was messy and his lips were red and slightly swollen from making out for so long. “Shit, you'll have to go” he said breathlessly, fixing his collar and adjusting his trousers. My brain was still in a haze, I jumped down from the counter and ran a hand through my hair, still comprehending what just happened. “My class is gonna start coming in soon” He said, walking over to a mirror he kept on the wall and checking his appearance. I walked over and picked up my bag before wiping my mouth on my sleeve. I didn't even know what to say to him. Thanks? That was nice? I'll see you tomorrow? I settled with the latter, my words coming out slightly wobbly, before I made my way to the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woooo! finally  
> think of this as a thank you for 1000 hits


	16. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Frank and Gerard's kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I've made you all wait a little while for this, I have another Frerard series which I've written a few chapters of already, so if you're interested then check that out. Also I have a oneshot that I'm not entirely finished yet so look out for that.

I went through the rest of the day in a haze. I could barely remember most of my classes. I just went in, sat down, and stared off into space. I didn't even realise it was the end of the day until Ray came over and shook me at the end of Chemistry. “What are you doing, man? Everyone's left” he said. I glanced up at him, he'd already put his blazer on and had his bag over his shoulder. “Oh... What do we have next?” I asked. “It's hometime, Frank” he said, giving me a bemused look. “Oh! Oh cool” I said, picking up my bag and standing up. I tried to follow him but I tripped over the leg of my chair and almost fell over. “What's with you today?” Ray asked, grabbing me by my arm and helping me stand up straight. “I dunno, I'm just not all there” I admitted, following behind him as he headed for the door. 

“You've got something on your mind” he said, holding the door open for me. I thanked him, knowing that I'd probably slam face-first into it if I attempted to open it myself. “I know” I said, lifting my bag further up my shoulder. “Tell me then” he inquired, putting his arm round my shoulders and pulling me closer to him. “Ow, you're hurting me” I whined and shoved him off. “Ah, I get it” he smirked mischeviously. “It's a crush isn't it.” I snapped out of my dreamy state and looked up at him nervously. “Oh my god!” he laughed “It actually is isn't it?” I blushed and looked away, unable to deny it. “Wow, so who's the hunk?” he said, egging me on. It was pretty uncomfortable hearing Ray say the word 'hunk'. Especially with such enthusiasm. “It's no one, I don't have a crush” I lied. I don't know why I bothered to be honest, Ray could read me like a book. I was scared that he could read my mind so I decided to think of something else – the homework I'd been assigned in Chemistry that I knew I wasn't going to do. “Ooh he's gone all quiet” Ray sang as he nudged my shoulder. “Enough, alright. I'm never gonna tell you” “Why not? I'm your best friend.” “It's just not the kind of thing we discuss. I could see his expression growing more and more frustrated as he went through a list in his head. 

“Is it Craig?” he asked, referring to a boy in our chemistry class who I'd never spoken to in my life. “No.” “Is it Alex?” I assumed he meant the Alex in his music class. “No.” “Is it Jordan?” “Who?” “Jordan, Jordan. My friend Jordan?” he asked. I shook my head and sighed “I'm gonna say no to everything you say so don't bother.” I heard him sigh bitterly in defeat. I didn't know why he cared so much, its not like he could do anything about it. 

I didn't want to go to Ray's that night because he'd just pester me about this non-existant 'crush.' Did Mr Way still count as a crush? I mean, he admitted he liked me, and we kissed. God, I smiled to myself whenever I thought about it. I couldn't remember a lot of the details because I was lost in the heat of the moment, but I knew it was perfect, and I knew I definitely wanted to do it again. All I could remember was how his hands felt on my hips, I felt so wanted when he did that. That night seemed to last forever, for once in my life I wanted the next morning to hurry up so I could go back to school. 

The next morning I practically leaped out of bed. I was even surprised myself by how enthusiastic I was. I pulled on my jeans and my shirt and tie, almost forgetting to eat before I headed out the door. It was probably the first time I'd arrived to school early in years. I had Art third period, so I'd still have to sit through my other classes before I could see Gerard. I sat bouncing my leg impatiently all the way through Spanish until Mrs Espinosa yelled at me to stop. 

I jumped up out of my seat when the bell went for the end of third period and raced out the door before the teacher could yell at me. I couldn't help but smile when I saw the door to my art class, I had to calm myself down before I went inside, otherwise I'd look deranged. When I did go inside, Gerard had just finished addressing the class. He glanced over at me and paused. I shot him a small smile before walking past to get to my desk. “Um...” he mumbled, trying to pick up where he left off. “Oh right, yes, like I was saying, the deadline for these projects is the 30th of next month... That's all I needed to say” he nodded. He said a few final words then sat down behind his desk, allowing everyone to get on with their work.

I'd not only been looking forward to seeing Mr Way, but I'd actually wanted to get on with my work too. I pulled out my phone and started working from a picture I'd saved. I figured Mr Way wouldn't mind much. Over the past few day's I'd completed several drawings, most of which I was rather proud of. I was just finishing a rough sketch of the mans' torso I was looking at and was about to go into detail when Mr Way called my name, making my head snap up to look at him. “Yeah?” I asked, suppressing a smile. “Give me your phone” he said blankly, holding his hand out. I felt a little disappointed and somewhat confused. “Why?” “You're not supposed to have phones out in class, you should know that by now” he said again, waving his hand and ushering me to go hand over my phone. “But I need it for my drawing” I argued. “I can print you off something else to draw.” I sighed vocally and stood up, unwillingly handing my phone over to him. There was nothing too incriminating on there but I still needed it. I just prayed it was just for the lesson and he wouldn't hold it for the rest of the day. 

When the end of the period did roll around, I went over to confront him. “Can I have my phone back now?” I asked politely. I might have sounded a little desperate, but my phone was important. “You may” he smiled, taking the phone out of his pocket and handing it back to me. I shoved it in the front pocket of my hoodie and uttered a quick 'thanks', but I didn't leave just yet. “So... about... yesterday” I began, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear gingerly. He took a deep breath and looked at me, seeming as calm and collected as ever. “What about it?” he asked nonchalantly as he got up and leaned against his desk. The way he spoke made it seem like we'd just played tennis or something, not like we'd made out on the counter. He looked completely innocent as he stood there with his arms folded over his chest. 

I was afraid that he was going to act like it never happened but I second-guessed myself when he grabbed me by the hand and pulled me up against him. I gasped and put my hands on his chest to stop myself from falling over. I definitely wasn't expecting that. I looked up at him, realising my face was most likely completely red. He smirked and laughed before reaching up and brushing my hair out of my face. It was a simple gesture, but it made my heart ache. It was then that I realised he had his hand on the curve of my back and our legs were tangled together. “W-what if someone comes in” I stammered, craning my neck around to check the door. “I don't have a class this period” he bowed his head down and I felt his hair tickle my cheek. I was confused as to what he was doing at first but then I felt his lips against the soft, untouched skin just below my ear. I couldn't help but gasp. “Mr Way-” I protested. I didn't want him to stop but I knew we were at high risk of being caught seeing as it was the middle of the day and his door was unlocked. “Anyone could walk in” I said, his lips then moved down my neck and he pulled back the faded collar of my school shirt and attacked the skin on my collarbone. I took a shaky breath and let my hand get tangled in his hair. I wasn't sure if I liked this type of kissing or regular kissing the best. “I-I need to go to my next class” I stammered, pushing him away. He went away without a fight, taking his hands and lips off me without a hint of annoyance. I felt much safer knowing that he would back off at any time. “I- Sorry, I need to get going” I explained, just a little bit flustered. I would've stayed there for the rest of the day if I could but I didn't feel like getting kicked out of school, that would mean I couldn't come back to Mr Way's class. “Alright” he said understandingly, going back to his normal, composed self. I was so annoyed at how well he did that.

Before I went to chemistry, I stopped in the bathroom to check that I didn't look too flustered. Thank god I did because when I looked in the mirror I noticed a small purple bruise on my lower neck. Mr Way had given me a fucking hickey. Thankfully it was low enough so I could hide it with my collar, but I had no idea how I was going to hide it wearing normal clothes. I buttoned my shirt up all the way and fixed my hair so I looked presentable. If anyone was going to notice something off, it would be Ray, so I just prayed he didn't say anything.


	17. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank misses Gerard after a few days of normality

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should probably let you know that I'm going back to school tomorrow so I'm not sure how frequently my upload schedule will be. I dont have a strict upload schedule but usually I try to upload a chapter other day. This year is quite a hectic year at school for me so I might have a lot of homework but I'll try to upload more than once a week.

A few days went by without anything out of the ordinary. It was good in some ways I supposed since I had time to get work done, but I also hadn't seen Mr Way alone since the incident with the hickey. I assumed he'd been busy so I didn't try to approach him at lunch or after class, I didn't want to pester him since this was his work after all. After I'd got the hickey I raided my Mom's make-up bag for something skin-coloured to cover it. I found some weird powdered thing that didn't cover it at all but eventually I found a foundation that got the job done. It was a bit darker than my skin but I blended it well and it didn't look too noticeable unless you were looking for it. The thing I didn't anticipate was that hickeys take a long fucking time to go away so I had to do it every day. Luckily for me, Ray wasn't the most observant guy and his room was always dark anyway.

I'd spent Friday night at Ray's house, as always. We had the whole house to ourselves since his brother went out and his Mom was on a trip. To anyone else this would be the perfect opportunity for a party, but for Ray and I it just meant we could play video games on the big TV in the living room for a change. I decided to sit a few rounds out, so Ray was battling zombies in single player. I noticed a trend in the amount of zombie-themed games my friend owned. “Should I invite Hannah over?” he asked, pulling his phone out of his pocket. “If you want” I shrugged. Hannah wasn't such a mood killer, in fact her presence was refreshing. I could only debate with Ray about video games, movies and the best episode of Star Trek for so long without getting bored. He dialled her number and put the phone to his ear. “Hey, you” he smiled, getting up and walking into the kitchen when she answered. I wasn't really interested in their muffled conversation and I was about to get up to scope out the fridge when my phone buzzed. 

It took me by surprise, I never got texts. The only person who ever texted me was Ray, and occasionally, if it was a special day, my Mom. I pulled the phone out of my pocket, expecting it to be from some spam number or my service provider. It seemed as though I was mistaken, though. Since when I unlocked my phone to check my messages, an unknown number showed up. I didn't recognise the digits at all, but I opened the text anyway. 

'Hey, how are you? X'

I stared down at he screen, re-reading the message over and over until my screen started to go dim. It had to be a wrong number, I thought. What would I even reply to that. I tapped out an answer 'Who is this?' I replied simply before shoving the phone back in my pocket. Ray came back into the room just in time, not noticing what had just went on. I'd known him for about four years now and I knew how nosy he was. “She says she'll come over” he informed me before plopping himself down on the couch next to me. I nodded in acknowledgement and sat patiently, watching as Ray unpaused the game and continued what he was doing. 

I was checking my phone every few minutes to see if I had a reply, but there was nothing. Eventually after about fifteen minutes I assumed it was a wrong number and the person had found who they were attempting to text. By that time Hannah had arrived and joined in Ray's game. “How have you been, Frank?” she asked, popping my bubble and bringing me back down to earth. “Oh, fine, just working hard” I smiled. That sounded weird coming out of my mouth, I was actually working. I'd really turned myself around in the past few months. “Sweet” she smiled, turning back to her game. I had just managed to forget about the text after accepting it was a wrong number, when my phone buzzed again. It caught Rays attention and he turned round, looking me up and down. “Who's that?” he asked. “Just my phone company” I replied quickly before I'd even got the phone out. “How d'you know?” he asked. I unlocked it and glanced at the text. 

'Take a wild guess x' 

I was even more intrigued now. How did this stranger even know they were texting the right person. I cast my mind back, thinking of all the people I'd given my number to. I couldn't recall giving it to anyone and I didn't think Ray or Hannah would give it out to people without my knowledge, so I had no idea. I texted back 'Can you give me a clue?'. I locked it and put it in my pocket again, expecting the response to take a little while, but to my surprise my phone vibrated almost immediately. Ray turned back round and shot me a suspicious look, before getting distracted by his game again. 

'I'm tall, dark and handsome x' 

I had to admit, the first person that sprung to mind was Mr Way. I pushed that thought away for a moment until it hit me. Mr Way had taken my phone. He could've easily taken my number from there. I looked down again, this time taking into account the kiss after every text. 'Is this Gerard?' I stared down at the screen, waiting for a response. Like the last one, it came in almost immediately, like the person had been expecting the reply. 'Of course it is, who else did you think it was? X' I took a deep breath and felt my stomach seize up in nervousness. He'd intentionally took my phone to get my number so he could text me. What the hell was I supposed to say now? I didn't have a chance to reply because Ray had jumped up from his seat on the floor and was leering over me, trying to look at the screen. I help my phone to my chest to stop him from seeing and pushed him away. “What the hell man!?” I yelled. “I wanna see who you're texting!” Ray protested, still trying to pry my phone out of my hands. Hannah was stunned, like she hadn't seen Ray act so childishly before. “I'm not texting anyone!” I slapped his hand away, desperately trying not to let him see. “Oh, I know” Ray wiggled his eyebrows. “It's that crush isn't it?” he smirked, turning to look at his girlfriend who was just plain confused. “Who's the guy then?” he asked, going for my phone again. “I told you I'm not texting! Stop it!” I held onto my phone for dear life. “Oh, leave him be” Hannah sighed, tugging at her boyfriend's arm. He was practically straddling me on the couch trying to wrestle the phone away from me. “Right! Enough, Ray. I'm serious!” I yelled, trying to shove him off with my feet. “Just let me see!” “No!” my hands were getting sore from grasping so hard and I couldn't hold on for much longer. “I said enough!” I screamed, kicking my knee up in the process and hitting him square in the gut. 

It got him to stop, but it didn't make him very happy as you can imagine. “Ow! What the fuck!?” he groaned, clutching his stomach as he keeled over on the floor. Hannah put her arm round his shoulders comfortingly and tried to whisper something soothing in his ear. “I told you to stop!” It was his own fault for not listening to me. “You did go too far” Hannah agreed. Eventually when he'd recovered from the blow to the stomach he stood up, glaring at me for a few seconds. The look on his face made me think he was going to hit me at first but he just sighed and sat down on the carpet in front of the TV to continue his game. I let out a deep breath and that hint of fear melted away. 

I didn't dare to check my phone until Ray had fallen asleep that night. He was laying across the couch and I was in a makeshift sleeping bag on the floor compiled of bedsheets and a pillow. I took my phone out and squinted at the illuminated screen in the darkness. I doubted he was still up at that time, but I replied anyway. 

'I don't know, I expected it to be a wrong number. Why did you save my number? X'

I was contemplating whether or not to put a kiss at the end, but eventually I decided I would. He'd put a kiss at the end of his hadn't he? I'd never put so much thought into one text before. Even after I'd sent it I read over it again to check I hadn't made a mistake. I didn't get a reply for a few minutes so I tucked my phone under my pillow and went to sleep.


	18. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank's worst nightmare comes true.

The next day I awoke to the sight of the ceiling. For a moment, I'd forgotten where I was and was confused as to why it wasn't my usual bedroom ceiling, until it dawned on me that I was still at Ray's house. I looked to my right, still squinting in the dim sunlight peeking through the blinds and spilling across the floor. My heart stopped when I saw Ray with his back turned, hunched over with my phone in his hands. Without hesitating I jumped up and leaped at him, knocking it out of his hand and sending it flying across the wooden floor. It took him by surprise and he cried out. “Ow! Jesus!” he yelled as he hit the floor at an awkward angle. I crawled over and grabbed my phone back and looked at the screen. It was undamaged, thankfully, but my worst nightmare had came true. Ray had been looking at the conversation between Gerard and I. 

“Who the hell is Gerard?” Ray asked, an angry look on his face. I didn't know what to tell him. I was on the verge of crying, this couldn't be happening right now. I just stared at him and watched as he grew even angrier. 

“Who is he? Huh!?” he raised his voice suddenly, making me jump. 

“Why were you going through my phone?” I whimpered. 

“Because you're not yourself at all recently! You're all spaced out and quiet and moody, I thought you were keeping something from me!” he yelled. We were both on our knees on the floor after I'd tackled him. I didn't want to tell him the truth, I just wanted to melt into the ground or turn back time or disappear. I wished I'd kept my phone in my pocket, I wished this hadn't happened altogether. “I'm waiting” Ray said, getting up so he was standing over me, looking down on me. Suddenly, his eyes flew open, like he'd had an epiphany. His lips parted slightly and he looked down in utter disbelief. “Gerard Way? Mr Way?” My vision blurred as my eyes filled with tears. “Oh, Jesus!” Ray exclaimed in disgust, turning around and running a hand through his hair. I sniffled and wiped my eyes, wishing over and over that this hadn't happened, that I hadn't been so stupid and careless. “What the hell, Frank!?” he asked, turning back round to face me. “Please don't tell me you guys have done stuff?” he stared down at me and I couldn't help but sob. I'd never cried in front of Ray and I didn't want to start now. 

The whole room darkened as a thick, black cloud passed through the sky and blocked out the sun. Ray just shook his head in disbelief, his eyes still wide open. “It just s-started as a st-upid crush” I explained, my speech breaking up at parts because of my sobs. “I didn't mean for it to get this far- I-I really like him” I stuttered. Ray didn't even look at me, he averted his eyes to the floor. “We haven't done much... Just kissed.” I tried to get my breathing back to normal, but I was still in shock. I didn't want Ray to hate me, that was the last thing I wanted. But the way he looked at the moment didn't seem like a friendly expression. “Ray, say something” I begged because his silence was too much to bear. “I don't know what to say” he shook his head and looked at me again. I got up and walked over to him, putting my hand on his shoulder. “Please don't think I'm a freak- please.” I whimpered, tears rolling down my cheeks. “I don't think you're a freak” he sighed. I smiled a little and looked into his eyes hopefully. “It's dangerous, What if the dude's a paedophile?” “He's not a paedophile! I'm seventeen!” “Frank, you can't be too sure about these things” What was this? An intervention? “He's not like that, he's a lovely, sweet, charming guy! I trust him!” I didn't want to hear this, I walked over and picked my hoodie up off the floor and pulled it on. “Look, dude, I think it's dangerous, he can go to jail for that” he tried to sound sincere and wise but he was just upsetting me even more. “Don't you think I fucking know that?! I know the risks and I feel guilty about it every day, but I can't help how I feel.” I was just letting any old shit come out of my mouth, I screamed anything just to block out his words. As long as I spoke, he couldn't. He was being perfectly logical, it was dangerous and illegal, but I didn't want my view of Mr Way to become distorted. I had to get away from Ray, to be on my own. “Don't go” Ray protested as he noticed I was shoving my clothes and belongings into my bag. “Look, I'm not gonna tell anyone, I'm just warning you. You need to get out of this relationship before it goes any further” he said, following me into the hallway. “You better not fucking tell anyone” I warned, turning round and giving him my coldest, most intimidating stare. He stopped in his tracks, allowing me to open the front door and run outside without a fight. 

I bolted down the driveway, out the gate and down the street, the thin, worn soles of my converse pounding against the pavement. It was a cold day and the deep breaths were making my throat numb. I didn't want to think about Mr Way as a creep or a manipulator or worse, a paedophile. I didn't want my image of him to be tarnished like that. When I pushed him off, he went without hesitation, that was a good sign wasn't it? I didn't stop running, I turned the corner and went full speed down the street. I noticed dark, thick clouds brewing up ahead and a thin drizzle started pouring from the sky. 

Maybe I was being childish. I wasn't an idiot, I heard stuff like this on the news all the time. There was always a story about some pervy fifty-year-old teacher who'd been caught banging a student. But I couldn't help but feel that this was different. I know, that's probably what they all said, I felt stupid just thinking it. The rain had gotten heavier and the drops were hitting my face and stinging my skin. My panting breaths were starting to hurt my throat and the numbness spread to my chest. I stumbled a little, bringing me to a halt. I keeled over, putting my hands on my knees and breathing hard. My hoodie was soaked now and my hair was sticking to my forehead. I put a hands up and wiped my numb cheeks, unsure what was rain and what was tears, not that it mattered. I walked over to a bus shelter across the street to get some shelter. My house was a fifteen minute walk away and I wasn't going to trek all the way there in this weather. I pulled out my phone to call my mum, but before I could do anything I noticed I had a new message. I bit my lip and tapped the mail icon, it could only be from one person. 

'What are you doing right now? X'

It was sent last night at about twelve AM, but I answered anyway. 

'I'm stuck in the rain. I got into an argument' 

It was blunt, but somehow I hoped he'd see the sly hint in the message. I didn't want to seem too needy, but I definitely was. I was distraught and stressed and upset, I could really use a hug from him at that moment. And as if my magic, my phone started ringing. I looked down at the screen, which was now covered in raindrops. I cleared my throat quickly and wiped the water off before answering. 

“Hello?” 

“Hi” 

It went quiet after that. It was quite a strange encounter. I mean, talking to him during school was one thing, but talking to him outside, on the weekend, over the phone? That was an odd sensation. I prayed that I didn't sound like I'd been crying but my voice was still hoarse from running all that way. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, sounding concerned. Shit. 

“No.” 

“Do you wanna tell me what happened?” 

“I don't want to get upset again” I was already fighting back the lump in my throat. He was much better at listening than Ray. 

“You're out in the rain?” he asked. “Yeah... I was at Ray's. I'm in the bus shelter now.” He tutted and I could basically hear him roll his eyes. “Let me come get you.” My stomach did a somersault “You don't need to do that” I gushed, although I really, really wanted him to. “Don't be stupid, you're not too far from the school are you?” I bit my lip and looked up at the sky. The rain hadn't shown any sign of stopping soon. “Tell me where you are, I'll come get you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, 18 chapters already.


	19. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard invites Frank back to his house

The rain wasn't letting up. I'd been waiting for about twenty minutes now. I stared down every car that went past, hoping it was Gerard's, but none of them were. Jeez, what the hell was taking so long, I was soaked through to the bone, even my t-shirt was getting wet. I was just about to give up hope when a silver Corolla turned the corner at the top of the street and slowed down to a halt. I didn't really picture him as a Corolla type of guy, but with the economy today and teachers wages I didn't suppose he had much of a choice. I pulled open the door and got in, pulling my bag onto my lap. 

“Jeez, you just been swimming?” he said, looking me up and down. I looked over at him, having to double take. He wasn't wearing his normal shirt and trousers combo; he was in a black t-shirt and jeans with a casual plaid shirt over it. His t-shirt was tight enough that I saw he outline of his chest. “It's really cold” I stated, although he could probably tell from my chittering teeth. “Well aren't you glad I came to save you?” He muttered, starting up the car and pulling off. 

I tried to take in every tiny detail of the interior. I wanted to observe everything, to get a bit of an insight into Gerard's life. The ashtray looked about thirty years older than the rest of the car and had several mashed up cigarette butts in it. Gerard must have had half his daily allowance in here. In the dish beside the gearstick were a few pennies in change, a lighter and a few crumpled up receipts. The car smelt so strongly of coffee, and other than the ash tray and the dish, the rest seemed pretty clean. I was so nervous, sitting bolt upright, clutching to my bag and not daring to move. “Are you okay?” Gerard asked without taking his eyes off the road. The air in the car was heavy and tense, and there was no radio or music playing, just the sound of the rain bouncing off the roof. “I can just drop you by your house if you want?” He asked, slowing the car down at a red light. “No... please don't” I said, looking over at him. He turned and our eyes met for a second. “There's no one in my house.. I don't want to be alone.” I smile played on his lips as I said that, a genuine one, the kind that made my stomach flutter (as cheesy as that sounded.) 

There were a million feelings running through me the whole car ride there. Fear, excitement, anxiousness, curiosity and a lot more that I didn't know the words for. I had no clue what was going to happen when I got there, or if he expected us to 'do' anything. I'd certainly thought about it, I just didn't know if I was ready. I'd never even kissed a guy until about two weeks ago. There was also that impending anxiety that once I was in his house, there was nowhere I could run. He had me under his full control as soon as I got into the car. All I could do was trust him and pray that he was the same Mr Way that I'd had pictured in my mind all along. It was probably Ray's words getting to me that made me nervous, but there was always a sick churning in my gut telling me that something could go wrong at any minute. 

“Here we are” He hummed, pulling into a street I'd never seen before. I'd been around this part of town, but Gerard's house was in a cul-de-sac that was hidden in lots of twists and turns. It was a pretty decent neighbourhood, with flowers and plants in the gardens and family hatchbacks in the driveways. Why did a single guy live in what seemed like a family neighbourhood? The thought struck me for a moment, but I shrugged it off. Gerard pulled up to his driveway. It wasn't the nicest house on the street, with only a patch of grass in front of the house and a concrete driveway. There were some hanging plants at the front by the door, but it seemed pretty basic. “You live in that big house by yourself?” It must have been a two-bedroom at least. “Yep.” He turned the engine off and took his keys from the ignition. “You ready to run for the door?” I smiled and nodded before we both threw the doors open and made a run for it. 

The hallway was dark, with a door to the left and a bathroom at the end, next to the staircase. Gerard pulled his converse off at the door and threw them to the side. “Jeez, you'll need a change of clothes” he said, examining me with his hands on his hips and biting his lip. “I don't have any with me, I slept in my clothes last night.” I said. I was jittering and my jaw was aching from clenching my teeth for so long. “Do you wanna have a shower?” he asked, taking my bag and putting it on top of the radiator at his side. “Uh- are you sure?” I'd never really taken a shower at another persons' house before, not even Ray's. And as much as I thought I knew him, Gerard was a stranger. “You look like a milk bottle” he chuckled, mocking the colour of my skin. I was pale before, but this was just taking the piss. “Fine. Where's your shower?” 

He lead me down the hall to the bathroom, pulling a fluffy white towel down from a high shelf and handing it to me. “I can put your clothes on the radiator after, just turn it on with the big power button” he said. I was still extremely nervous, this was so far out of my comfort zone. “Don't worry, I won't peek” he rolled his eyes. I blushed and shooed him out so I could attempt to peel off my sopping wet clothes.

I had to admit, the shower really helped. It stung at first when I got in since the temperature changed the searing heat, but eventually my muscles started to relax. I would've stayed in there for so much longer, but Gerard was probably waiting and I didn't want to use up his hot water. I bent down and picked up one of the half-empty bottles strewn across the floor of the shower. The guy was messy, not in a dirty way, but in a way where everything looked like he'd just left it in a hurry. It was coconut scented shampoo. I was pretty sure it was for women, but it smelt fucking fantastic. I squeezed a little into my hand but ended up with a palm full of it. Oh well, I guess I was going to smell like coconut for the rest of today. 

I was feeling more relaxed afterwards as I dried myself on the towel. It was warm from the radiator and I felt the urge to bury my face in it before actually using it. I couldn't believe I was naked in Mr Way's bathroom, even saying it to myself didn't sound real. I wasn't expecting his house to be like this, although I wasn't sure what I expected his house to be like. Some kind of utopia with art and décor and couture furniture? No. Once I'd finished drying myself it dawned on me that I had no clothes to change into. He did say he'd bring me a change of them didn't he? Was I going to have to yell for him through the door. I fucking would. 

“Gerard!” I called, feeling extremely exposed, even with the towel round my waist. Nothing. “Geraaard!” I hopped from foot to foot, starting to feel that chill again as the droplets of water down my back started to cool down. I heard movement in the hallway as he shuffled around. “Here you go.” I pulled the door open just a crack, hiding my modesty behind it. He was holding a pile of folded clothes. “It's not the best, but it'll do until yours dry” how long was he expecting me to stay? And what exactly did he have planned? “Thanks” I mumbled, taking the clothes and closing the door again. I unfolded them to find a plain white v-neck, grey cotton joggers and a pair of black boxers. Mr Way's boxer's, I blushed at the sight of them. “Are those okay?” he called from the other side of the door. At least they were clean (as I could tell from the overbearing scent of laundry detergent.) “Yeah” I uttered, pulling them on. If someone had told me last year that one day I'd be naked in my art teachers bathroom I'd have punched them in the jaw, yet here I was. 

The shirt was slightly big for me, but the joggers and underwear seemed close enough. I checked myself out in the mirror. My hair was messy and damp and my cheeks were read from the heat of the shower. I looked like such a child, and these oversized clothes weren't helping. I gathered up my wet clothes, holding them away from me, and opened the door. When I opened it I noticed the radio was on, playing some mainstream song I had never heard of. Gerard was leaning against the wall outside. He turned to look at me, staring up and down. He didn't say anything for a minute, before he cracked up. “What!?” I demanded. “Nothing” he shook his head. It clearly wasn't nothing, he must have found the fact that I looked like an escaped patient from the childrens' ward pretty amusing. “I'll deal with those” he said as he took the scrunched up ball of dripping clothes from me, putting them on the floor and starting to hang each garment one by one on the radiator. “I-It's okay- I can to it” I started, but it was too late. He picked up my chequered pair of boxers, draped them across the radiator, and continued with my jeans and t-shirt. I was so humiliated. It was only a piece of fabric, but I'd just been wearing that piece of fabric right next to the most private part of my body just under an hour ago. “There” he said, once he was done embarrassing me. “Did that warm you up?” I was still shivering a little, but physically I was alright. “I've been working on a painting” he nodded, indicating to the door slightly further up the hall. “Wanna see?” Well at least we weren't struggling to find something to do. “Sure” I smiled shyly. 

I was a bit stupid to think the interior of My Way's house was completely normal. The livingroom was quite boldly decorated with a red, suede, statement couch and a few other red accents around the room. There was a pretty average sized TV on the wall and the wooden table and cabinets were painted black. I'd also noticed the guy had an affinity for plants. There was a tiny cactus in the bathroom and a few potted plants scattered around in this room. 

It all would've been normal, if not unconventional, if it weren't for the easel in the middle of the room, sitting atop a stained plastic sheet. “Watch your feet, some of that paint might be a bit wet” he warned, pointing to the colourful splodges on the sheet. On the easel there was a canvas. I couldn't see what it was since it was turned away, but I made my way round so I could face it straight-on. In the centre there was a man, laying on what looked like a hospital bed in front of a chequered floor. He was drawn quite blocky and cartoon-y, like in a superhero comic. The figure had dark hair, like Gerards' own. “Is that you?” I asked, looking up at him eagerly. “I'm not quite sure” he shrugged. It wasn't finished, but he'd painted in most of the man and the background. “I like the way you do people” I said, staring at it thoughtfully. “How do you mean?” he turned to look at me. “Well... the way its all... angular.” “Angular? Big word isn't it?” “Shut up” he couldn't be serious for one minute. “Go on then, tell me what angular means” he smirked. I couldn't help but laugh a little. He isn't even funny, how could he make me laugh when I didn't even want to? 

The laughter faded away and we were left, with the buzz of the radio wafting in from the kitchen next door. Suddenly, a cold wave shot down my spine, causing my whole body to shudder. “You're still cold?” Gerard asked, turning to me. “N-no, It was just one of those things” I shrugged. I wasn't sure if it was the cold or nerves that were making me so jittery. Whatever the reason, Mr Way grabbed my wrist and pulled me over to the couch and sat me down, picking up a black, cotton blanket from the arm and draping it round me. “Oh, don't” I protested. I didn't like to be fussed over or babied, especially by someone I was trying my best to seem attractive to. “I hope you're not getting a cold” he said, pressing his hand against my forehead. “I never get the cold.” I said bluntly. “You were in the rain a pretty long time” “Yeah well maybe you should've hurried up.” He tutted and sighed, retracting his hand.

I looked down at his hand that was resting in his lap, then at the one draped round the back of the couch. He was facing me, but we weren't touching. I wanted him to be closer. I wanted him to reach out and put his arms round me like he'd done before. “What were you and Ray arguing about?” he asked, trying to further the conversation. I really didn't want to talk about it. “Just something stupid” I mumbled. I knew he'd freak out if I told him Ray knew, he'd made it clear before how cautious he was about this. Mr Way was the main focus in my life right now, and I didn't want him to disappear. It was probably unhealthy to want someone this much, especially if the relationship was frowned upon like this.

He was saying something, but I didn't listen, I leaned forward and laid my head on his shoulder, my forehead resting in the crook of his neck. Whatever he was banging on about couldn't be too important, because he stopped and put his arm round my shoulder. “Why did you come get me?” I asked. It was a stupid question, but I wanted to change the subject. “Because I didn't want you to be left in the cold” I felt the murmurations of his voice against my cheek when he spoke. “Was that the only reason?” He went quiet after that. I didn't realise it was such a touchy question. “What was the other reason?” I asked. “I guess I was just like you said” he mumbled. I felt him rub my shoulder comfortingly. “What's that?” I pulled away and looked up at him through sleepy eyes. “I just didn't want to be alone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Awwww, what a fluffy way to end that.   
> This chapter is so damn long, its four pages of a word document. Aren't you guys lucky.


	20. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank wants to have sex, but isn't sure if he can go through with it.

It was heartbreaking hearing Mr Way say that. I had no idea what to say afterwards. We sat in silence for a few moments. He wasn't looking at me, but the floor instead, evidently a little embarrassed by what he'd just blurted out. “You don't have to be alone” I said sincerely, looking up at him. I put my hand on his cheek and turned his head so he was looking me in the eyes. “You've got me” I smiled assuringly. I draped my other arm around his neck and pulled him into a kiss. It was the first time I'd initiated a kiss and I had no idea where all this new-found confidence had come from. Maybe once I'd seen him looking so vulnerable, I realised we were in the same boat. None of us were entirely sure of what we were doing. He tilted his head and moved his lips against mine and I noticed his face was smooth this time. I felt his hands on my waist, pulling me closer until I was almost in his lap. It was such a rush being so intimate with someone, the fact that it was so wrong just made it more exciting. There was a surge of energy through my body and I shuddered again, making my shoulders and neck twitch. Gerard pulled away, to my disappointment. “You can't be cold still, surely?” he asked, looking at me. “No, I'm not” I stated, I tried to kiss him again but he got up and walked into the kitchen. “Do you want some tea? Coffee?” I groaned and pulled the blanket round my shoulders. “Coffee. Milk and sugar.” I grumbled. He nodded and closed the door over, not completely, but enough so he blocked out the sound of the radio. 

I sighed and sank lower into my seat, when I noticed his wallet lying on the coffee table. That curiosity came sweeping back to me again. I really needed to find out how old he was. I just hoped it wasn't anywhere near my Mom's age. I glanced up at the door, hearing him hum as he wandered around the kitchen, and leaned forward to pick it up. It was pretty slim and light and when I unclipped it there were only a few paper notes sticking out of the top. I turned it round to look at his drivers' license which was in the clear slide. It was probably the only attractive ID photo I'd seen in my life. I scanned it and saw what I was looking for. 

'DOB = 9/4/82'

1982\. I was never good at maths. I added it up in my head, that meant he was only thirty-three. I sighed internally with relief. Thirty-three wasn't too old, at least not to me. “What are you doing?” his voice came from the doorway. I jumped and looked up at him. He looked confused, but mostly angry. This was far more embarrassing than my fucking boxer shorts. I stuttered and stumbled for words. “If you're gonna rob someone, don't rob a teacher. I've got no money.” he said bitterly, walking to the table and putting two cup of coffee down. “I wasn't stealing” I put the wallet down on the table “I just wanted to see how old you are.” “Why?” I wondered how I managed to still be cold when my cheeks were flushing so hard. “I was just curious” I shrugged. “Well, I'm old enough” he slid the coffee cup over to me and sipped at his own. I didn't feel like drinking it, the last thing I needed was to be more jittery. I picked it up and took a swig, just to be polite “Old enough for what?” I asked. “Old enough to know better” he muttered. I was a little hurt by that remark, the way he just tossed it around like it didn't mean anything. Was that a deliberate dig at me or did he not realise he was being an asshole. “I don't think that's old” I said matter-of-factly. I wasn't going to let him bring my mood down. “I mean ther'es plenty of actors in their forties that I would definitely bang” I hope he wasn't getting the wrong idea from all of this. “What do you mean? I'm only twenty eight” he said. I was puzzled for a moment until I saw that sly smirk pulling at his lips again. I was so thick. I rolled my eyes and layed back against the couch. “I'm still quite a bit older than you” he went on. I didn't give a shit if he was two times my age, he was still fucking hot. 

“Do you think your clothes have dried yet?” he asked, putting his mug down on the table with a thud. I didn't care about my clothes, I hoped they weren't dry so I could have an excuse to stay longer. “Why? You trying to get rid of me?” I smirked. He turned and looked at me, a smile playing on his lips. “You know that's not true.” When had I become so good at flirting? Maybe that was my hidden talent, It had just gone undiscovered for so many years. A sexless virgin like myself shouldn't have been so suggestive. 

Gerard leaned back and pressed his lips against mine. I let my eyes slide shut, going along with everything he did. My stomach was doing back flips, at least it felt that way. I allowed him to pull me forward into his lap. I was much more comfortable being on top, knowing that I could stop at any time if I needed, although at this point I never wanted it to end. He rested his hands on my hips and I draped mine round his shoulders. I could feel my blood rushing through my veins and my heart thumping in my chest. I opened my mouth and allowed his tongue to enter. I went to adjust into a more comfortable position but my hips moved down against his and a low groan escaped his throat. “I-I'm sorry” I gushed, pulling away from him. “No, do it again” he groaned, looking at me through lidded eyes. Was I really going to do this? If I did it again, I was initiating something further, something more than just kissing. I wanted it, but I just didn't know if I was fully prepared. I bit my lip and rolled my hips slowly in a circular motion, making eye contact with him the whole time. His eyes closed and his lips parted slightly. God, I loved that face. I pressed my lips against his, more desperately this time, with my tongue running over his and my hand raking through his hair. I felt him caressing my back, and frankly, it was making me shiver. I moved my hands down to his shoulders and tugged at his flannel over-shirt. He was clearly no beginner at this kind of thing because he took my hints and tugged the shirt off and let it fall to a heap on the floor. 

I felt as though I had to follow his lead and take something of mine off, so I lifted my shirt up (Well, Gerard's shirt) and threw it down in a pile next to his. I looked down at him anxiously, waiting for a reaction. He scanned my bare chest and moved his hands down my back. The way he did that made the hairs on my neck stand up and my spine arch. He bent down and pressed his lips against my neck, forcing a gasp from my throat. “Don't- not on my neck” I protested, holding the back of his head. Gerard understood and moved down to my chest, kissing just below my collar bone. He was biting and sucking all along my shoulder and chest. I tried to be quiet, it was embarrassing hearing myself gasp and moan so pathetically, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't suppress it. I'd also found it hard to suppress something else that was becoming all the more obvious in my pants. 

“Gerard- I can't” I gasped. He pulled away and looked up at me “Can't do what?” he asked “I-I'm gonna... um” I blushed, trying not to catch his eye. “You're gonna what?” he asked in that low, husky voice. “I'm getting a little... um...turned on” I mumbled quietly. I felt his hands on my thighs and his lips on my neck again “Is that not what we're aiming for?” he uttered. His breath was hot against my skin and I was starting to lose focus again. “I want to... I just... I've never done it before” I let myself relax into him. My skin burned wherever he touched me and the hair on my arms was starting to stand on end. “I'm not going to do anything you don't want” he assured me. “Just tell me when to stop and I will.” Oh god, I was actually considering this... I was just one word away from having sex with Mr Way. My stomach seized up and that familiar wave of anxiety came crashing into me. 

“I want to”

That was a sign for Gerard to take his shirt off. He tugged it over his head, with some struggle, and threw it across the room. His hair was a mess from my hands and now it was hanging in his face. I did a quick scan of his body, biting my lip when I noticed that trail of dark hair on his abdomen. I laid down on my back, resting my head on the arm of the couch and looking up at him expectantly. “Are you sure you wanna do it here?” he asked. “I'm not fussy” I said, pulling him down by his shoulders. I felt his hand glide up one thigh before lifting it round his waist. He was balancing on his elbows and knee's, his hair hanging down and brushing against my face. “Is it gonna hurt?” I asked. “Yeah, hold on.” he got up, leaving me on my own on the couch. “Awh, no” I whined. Where was he going now? I was really fed up with all his cock-blocking today. 

The cold got to me when he wasn't there and I felt a draft against my bare chest. I pulled the joggers off and threw them on the floor, slightly disgruntled at being left. He wasn't gone for long though, and when he came back he was holding a bottle in his hand. “What's that?” I asked. He kneeled in front of me and lifted my thighs round his waist. He didn't need to tell me, because I could see now that it was a bottle of lube and a condom. 

“Have you ever used your fingers before?” he asked casually, looking down at me. I blushed furiously and looked away. That was probably the most personal and intrusive question someone had ever asked me, yet Gerard acted like we were discussing something as trivial as school work. “Yes” I mumbled, covering my flushed face with my hands. “Alright, you shouldn't be too bad then” he bent down and kissed my shoulder before fiddling with the button on his jeans. It was so tense, and all I could hear was the zipper on Gerards' jeans. 

After a bit of struggling, he finally got his trousers off. Now there was only thin layers of fabric separating us both from being completely naked. I glanced down, he definitely didn't look small is all I could say. “Lift your hips” he ordered. I did as he asked and he slid a pillow under ny lower back. “To support your hips” he said. “It's easier like this.” He took another look over me. I felt so exposed, I was bearing everything to him. I'd put my full trust in him, all I could do was hope that he listened to me. I took a deep breath and tried to calm my nerves. “Are you ready?” he whispered, putting his hand on the waistband of my boxers. “You first.” He nodded and took his hand away, putting his thumbs under the waistband of his boxers and sliding them down slowly. I glanced down, I wasn't wrong with my previous assumption. He wasn't huge, but he wasn't too small either. He was definitely bigger than me, that's for sure. I pulled mine off and discarded them to the side with the rest of my clothes - and there we were - completely naked in front of one another. I had my eyes closed, not daring to open them for fear of seeing him staring me up and down again. I heard the foil of the condom being ripped open. All that was left to do was to wait patiently. I was finding it hard to breathe, I still couldn't comprehend what was happening, that this was actually real. I felt as if this was all about to melt away, that I would pinch myself and wake up to find it had all been an elaborate dream. It wasn't though, the sound of the radio and the cap clicking on the bottle and Gerard's breathing was definitely real. When he was finished preparing himself, he bent down and kissed me lightly on the lips. “I'll take it slow, alright?” he said, looking into my eyes. I nodded and braced myself. 

No matter how much I worried about it before, nothing could of anticipated how bad the pain was. I cried out as soon as he'd put it in. “Sorry!” he said, lifting my thighs higher. I bit my lip and squeezed my eyes shut. “Tensing up just makes it worse, try to relax a little” he soothed. I put my hands on his shoulder blades and took a deep breath, trying to follow his instructions. “Can I move now?” “Yes.” It wasn't getting any better. How did anyone go through this? I was starting to believe everyone who did this was just lying, how could this be enjoyable? “Are you alright? Do you need me to stop?” There were tears threatening to well up at the sides of my eyes, except this time it was from pain. I opened them and looked up at him, he looked so worried. “I'm fine” I nodded. “Seriously, just tell me to stop if you don't want to, you might not be ready ye-” “I said I'm fine, just keep going.” I didn't want to stop, we'd gone so far and I didn't want to back out now or let him down. He nodded and pushed in again, slower this time. I bit the inside of my cheek and dug my nails into his back. “That's it, I'm fully in now” he said. I exhaled and looked up at him. He reached up and brushed my hair out of my face. “Tell me when you're ready again.”

The worst part was out the way, but it still hurt whenever Gerard moved. He was thrusting in and out slowly. It felt so strange and I couldn't help but groan whenever he moved forwards. It was starting to hurt less little by little, but that strange feeling stayed. I felt him rest his forehead against the crook of my neck, his hair tickled my bare skin. The room was filled with our heavy breathing and my brain started to get hazy. He kept lifting my hips and pushing my thighs wider apart, when he finally hit that sweet spot that I'd heard so much about. A loud, voluptuous moan escaped my lips. That was a noise I had definitely never made before. He stopped and looked at me with a devious smirk. “I-I didn't-” I stuttered, turning red. I'd sounded like a porn star. I would've tried to stop it but the feeling was so sudden and totally unexpected. Gerard smirked and thrusted again, making me throw my head back and dig my nails into his shoulders. “Oh my god” I panted. I heard him groan quietly in my ear as he continued to roll his hips. 

My head was a mess, all clouded up with static and white noise. All I could hear were Gerard's little gasps and grunts in my ear every now and then. I had lost control of my own body, I was making sounds I didn't even know I had the potential to make. I had no control over the volume either, I just hoped the neighbours didn't hear. If I wasn't so dazed I probably would've been overcome with embarrassment, but all my convictions went out the window. I was almost drunk with pleasure. He started to speed up, thrusting faster and harder. I dragged my nails down his back. The nerves in the pit of my stomach went haywire with every thrust, sending chills all through my body and making my thighs shake.

“Gerard- please-” 

I was starting to beg now, making little whining noises and calling out his name and pleading him not to stop. I kept dragging my nails up and down his back and tugging at his hair, which surely hurt, but he didn't seem to protest. “Frank-” he moaned in my ear. Fuck, that was driving me insane, the way his voice was low and husky and laced with desire. I felt his hand wander from my hip, trailing up the side of my body. It was so strange having someone else touch my bare skin. He lifted his head from my shoulder and we locked eyes. He was a state; all sweaty and red in the face with messy hair and shiny lips slick with spit, It was insanely attractive. I probably looked worse, I was the one sweating and panting and crying out every few seconds. “God, Frank” he panted, rolling his hips in a circular motion. The sensation in my stomach was starting to get more intense with each thrust and I couldn't stop my body from shaking and convulsing uncontrollably. Gerard's groans were becoming more frequent and higher in pitch. I could tell I was so close to finishing. 

The sensation in my stomach became unbearable. I moaned his name one last time, my voice high and raspy. I let my mouth fall open as I let out a shaky breath, my whole body seizing up for a second. I hadn't realised that Gerard was still going since I was still coming down from my orgasm. I looked him through half-lidded eyes. His breathing became more frantic and his eyes squeezed shut. He let out a long, drawn-out groan and his back arched. If I hadn't already came, that sight would've sent me over the edge. I watched in awe as he let out a deep breath and shuddered. 

When he opened his eyes I was smirking up at him. “What?” he asked, his chest rising and falling with his heavy breathing. “That was...” I couldn't find the words to describe it, my brain hadn't fully recovered yet. I felt him pull out, leaving me feeling sticky and, if I'm honest, pretty gross. Thankfully I was still too dazed to care. He pulled his boxers on and got up, heading into the kitchen and putting the condom in the trash. He stumbled a little on his way back and collapsed on the couch. I was still spread out in all my sweaty glory. I figured I'd better get up and clean myself. So I pulled my boxers on and stood up. I almost fell straight on my face as my thighs were still trembling. I couldn't walk properly either, I practically had to hobble to the bathroom. 

I couldn't sit properly afterwards, I had to slouch so I was balancing more on my lower back than my actual ass. I noticed when Gerard was driving me home. I still couldn't come to terms with it, I was officially not a virgin any more. I never thought I'd say that before Ray. We didn't have much to talk about on the journey, the radio filled the silence. Not that I was trying to keep up a conversation, I was too lost in my own thoughts to even acknowledge the lack of dialogue. I was still wearing his shirt since mine hadn't fully dried yet. When we finally pulled up next to my house he sighed and looked over at me. “Well...” he said. I didn't have much to say, it was fucking amazing, but he probably already knew that. I leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on his lips, just as a goodbye gesture. His features softened and he smiled. “Bye” I whispered. “Bye.” I got out of the car and pulled my bag over my shoulder before slamming the door shut. It was almost five o'clock, which meant I'd spent a good four hours or so at Gerard's house. I didn't know where the time went to be honest. I turned and waved to him before he drove off. I watched his car get further and further into the distance until he was out of sight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOaoooa 
> 
> this was a long one, but I didn't want to leave it at a cliffhanger half way through sex.
> 
> Happy 20 chapters people


	21. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank tries to sort things out with Ray after he finds out about him and Mr Way.

I probably would've been able to take my mind off of what happened at Gerard's house if I wasn't reminded every time I sat down. It was well worth it at the time, but this constant burning sensation was starting to become a pain in the ass (if you don't mind the pun.) At school, all I could do was sit down as delicately as possible and try not wince. How long was this going to last? Was it going to be like this every time we did it? 

I was dreading facing Ray after what happened, It seemed we'd spent more time arguing over the past few months than being actual friends. When break rolled around, I headed to the bench to find him already sitting there. “Hi.” I said bluntly, standing in front of him. I didn't want to sit down just yet in case we got into another disagreement and I had to make a quick exit. 

“Hi yourself.” Okay, so he was in one of those moods today. 

“Look, I hope you're not still pissed off about the other day” I sighed. In all honesty, I just wished we could drop it and never speak about Gerard and I ever again, but it was never that easy. 

“I'm not really pissed off... Just weirded out” he shrugged and shrivelling up his nose. I couldn't really blame him, I was weirded out by it sometimes too. Like the other day when I realised I was in my art teachers' bathroom naked. 

“You don't understand” I sighed exasperatedly. If only he knew what it was like in my shoes, to have some hot older guy all to yourself whenever you pleased. It was so hard to say no, even the thought of it made Frank's body heave. 

“It's not healthy! You could get into a tonne of trouble!” He pleaded, before lowering his voice and looking around suspiciously, “It's illegal.” 

“I fucking know that, asshole. Why can't you just keep your nose out of it?” 

“It's pretty hard to ignore something like that.” 

“Just pretend you never found out!” 

He sighed and pouted, furrowing his brows at me. We stared at each other for a moment, before he looked away. “I'm just worried about you” he mumbled. Wow, Ray was being sensitive for once. “I know you like the guy, but he could easily take advantage of you, y'know. You have to be careful... I don't know- what the hell am I supposed to say in a situation like this?” he sighed, clearly getting flustered and frustrated that he couldn't find the right words.

“I know you're worried, but I can take care of myself,” I perched myself on the edge of the bench and looked down at the ground. “I know how wrong it sounds, but he's not so different from me really. I've really gotten to know him after a while.” Ray turned to look at me in that moment. 

“Just how much have you seen of this guy?” He asked. “How many times have you met up with him?” I smiled and shook my head as all the memories rushed back to me. “Frank?!” 

“Just a few times!” I growled, locking eyes with him. “I went to his house on Saturday.” 

Ray's eyebrows shot up and he blinked a few times. “You went to his house?” 

“Yeah, and guess what? We had sex.” 

“What!?” He spluttered, choking on his saliva. I nodded and watched as he grasped his throat and coughed violently. “You fucking-” he started, coughing a little more before gaining full composure. “You had sex?! Frank how stupid can you be!?” He hissed. 

“Oh, don't act so surprised.” I rolled my eyes. He was being so dramatic. “I don't expect you to understand - since you like demonizing him so much – but he's a nice guy, he takes care of me.” 

“Yeah, that's called grooming” he snorted. 

“Shut up!” I growled. 

“What about that guy he kissed then? Hm? How do you know he hasn't got a whole harem of boys wrapped around his finger? You think you're so special?” 

That sentence hit me like a truck. I had completely forgotten about that day, when I saw Gerard kiss that other man. A wave of dread crashed into me and a sick feeling crept into my stomach. 

“Yeah, you didn't think about that before you ran off and fucked him did you?” he said. I felt bad enough without Ray adding to it. “You really can be dim sometimes.” 

“Shut up.” I was dumbstruck. Everything was starting to fall into place now. Everything Ray was saying made perfect sense but I hoped to got that it wasn't true. 

He laughed. “I told you, he's a manipulator! I told you to be careful!” He leaned closer so I had no way of ignoring him. “What did I tell you?” 

I looked at my friend. He was jiving and leering at me. Why did he take so much pride in making me miserable? Was this a joke to him? He kept leaning closer and closer and I could feel his breath on my face. What happened next was like a moment of clarity; I raised my fist and thrust forward, connecting it to his jaw. 

The fact that it was so sudden and unexpected was the reason it was so effective. I barely remember even lifting my arm or moving at all, but suddenly I was standing upright and Ray was at my feet, groaning in pain and writhing in the dirt. 

“You punched me! You fucking punched me!” he wailed, holding his cheek. I looked down at my trembling hand, my knuckles went numb. I turned and faced a crowd of staring faces, some pulling out phones, some laughing or cheering. I did the only thing I knew what to do in that situation - run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry about the short chapter, I thought this would be a good way to end it, ha.


	22. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank is on the run

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! We just got 2k hits! And my other fic has just passed 1k hits! I'm so happy

Why the fuck did I do that?

Why the fuck did I do that?

That was all that went through my head as I passed the school gates. 

My feet were pounding against the pavement and my bag was tugging at my side as I ran, slowing me down. I looked behind me to see if anyone was following, when I ran straight into another student, knocking him straight over. 

“Holy shit! What the fuck!?” his friend yelled. Chips flew everywhere as he dropped his lunch in the process of his fall. I didn't have time to turn back or even utter a quick 'sorry', he'd collided straight with my shoulder, sending a dull ache through my entire right side. It was probably adrenaline keeping most of the pain away. 

I continued my sprint down the street and around the corner, passing more students as I went. I saw heads turn as I rushed past, making sure not to bump into another one of them again. The blood in my head was pumping so hard that I felt it was going to burst an artery. 

I didn't know where the hell I was running. This wasn't the direction of my house at all, so where were my feet taking me? I wasn't making any sense, my main objective was getting as far from that school as possible. My lungs were aching from my panting and the bottoms of my feet and knees started to sting. I'd gotten a good few blocks away before I came to a gas station. I stopped outside and leaned against the wall of the store, trying to catch my breath. I stood there for a good five minutes, no doubt getting a good few stares from customers. Once I'd somewhat regained my normal breathing capacity, I emptied my pockets and gathered up all the change I had. It amounted to 2 dollars and 65 cents in total, just enough to buy myself a drink. 

I sat on the pavement outside sipping at my red bull, trying to regain my strength and clear my thoughts. No doubt they were looking for me, calling my Mom and emergency contacts. I'd only got about halfway through the can when a police cruiser approached from up the street. I got to my feet, my thighs still burning, and stared in anticipation. I watched as it slowed, examining the area. Did the school really make things like this a police matter? I pulled my hood over my head and tugged my bag over my shoulder, turning and heading swiftly down the street. I was gripping my can for dear life, praying that they didn't notice me. This must have been the closest I'd ever come to being a real criminal. I heard the car speed up from a few meters behind me, I sped up with it, practically speed-walking down the street. The sirens started to sound and I dropped my can and decided to make a run for it. 

There wasn't much use as the only path there was to run down was right next to the road. There was a grass verge to my left leading up a steep hill into some bushes. I decided there was no other possible direction and tried to break for it. I didn't get very far as I heard a car door lslam behind me and, soon enough, I was being dragged back down the hill by a meat-headed police officer. 

“Let me go!” I screamed. I wasn't sure why, It's not like they were going to. 

I was expecting them to put handcuffs on me, but luckily for them I was only a minor. I was slightly disappointed, if I was going to get dragged into a police car in broad daylight in front of a bunch of people, I'd prefer to go the whole hog – handcuffs and everything. 

They'd dragged me back to school, where I found my Mom and Ray's Mom waiting in the lobby. “Frank!” she hissed, storming over and grabbing me by the arm. “What do you think you're playing at, hm!? I thought you and Ray were friends'- and running off like that! You had us all worried sick!” She should've been sleeping about now, she had work in a few hours. 

“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to” I mumbled, as I had nothing else to say. She shook her head sighed, shooting me that piercing stare that I hadn't seen for a while. I'd been doing so well – I hadn't gotten in trouble for so long. How could I be so stupid and ruin everything. 

“Mrs Lattison is ready for you.” Came a voice from the door nearby. My Mom grabbed my wrist and tugged me in the direction of the principals office.

“Frank... What are we going to do with you?” Mrs Lattison sighed. “I have to say, I'm disappointed that you're back in my office.” I was seated next to Ray, who had a damp paper towel pressed against his jaw. Our mothers were asked to wait outside for now – thank god. I didn't need two disapproving pairs of eyes in the room at one time. “Tell me what happened?” she asked. Clearly Ray hadn't mentioned about Mr Way. I'd only just realised in the police car on the way here that he could've easily told someone. I bit my lip and took a shaky breath, trying to stop my voice from wavering. 

“We got into an argument... and he started yelling.. I just got scared, I guess, so I punched him” I couldn't look her in the eye. Was that the truth? Even I wasn't sure anymore. 

“What were you arguing about?” 

My heart skipped a beat and I felt sweat forming on my brow. “Just something stupid,” I stuttered “It doesn't matter.” 

“Does it not?” She asked, peering at me. I shook my head, staring into her eyes and praying she didn't see straight through me. She then turned to Ray, who'd been staring at the floor this whole time with his back slightly turned to me. If he was in a bad mood with me, he'd definitely tell. He would get me into so much trouble if he did, and it would surely be payback for punching him. I dug my nails into my thigh and bit the inside of my cheek. Please don't tell, please don't. 

“Yeah, it doesn't matter.” He muttered quietly. My heart fluttered and my eyes slipped closed. Thank god. I don't know what Ray was thinking by not throwing me under the bus, but I would be forever thankful for it. 

“So, Ray.” She began. “Do you have anything you want to say to Frank?” 

Ray turned and looked at me, seemingly unforgiving. “No.” 

Mrs Lattison sighed and rolled her eyes. “Frank do you have anything to say? You're going to have to come to an agreement of some sort.”

“I'm sorry.” I said, looking at Ray. “I really don't know what came over me, I regret it.” I hope I sounded sincere. I really was regretful, but in these situations I hated letting my feelings out. “Can we please go back to being friends?” I felt Mrs Lattison's eyes on me at all times. Ray lifted his head and let out a sigh. 

“Alright.” 

“Well, thats' that out of the way. You've made my job much easier” the principal smiled and nodded. “Now, Frank. Your punishment.” 

“Please don't kick me out, Miss!” I pleaded. “I know I shouldn't have done it, I've learned my lesson.” I had put my hands up in front of me in a praying position, that was how desperate I was. 

“You've been pretty good for the past few months, so I should see no reason to kick you out for poor performance.” She stated,glancing down at the paper in front of her. “The worst I can do is give you a weeks' suspension.” I sighed in relief, I had been suspended for weeks at a time before, so that wasn't too bad. 

“Thank you” I sighed. She looked at me strangely before writing something down. Now all that was left to do was tell Gerard.


	23. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank confesses to Gerard about Ray

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a short break, I'm back with a new chapter. Although I do have exams coming up so I'm not sure how my uploading schedule will be for the next few weeks.

I had no idea how I was going to break it to Gerard that Ray knew. I didn't want him to get scared off – or worse, get angry. I spent the rest of the day in my room, picturing all the different things I could say and trying to figure out how to word it the best. I contemplated just texting him, but I decided that was just insensitive, he deserved to be told face to face. My nerves were heightened because it had started to become clear to me that Gerard wasn't as sweet and innocent as I'd originally thought. That guy he'd kissed – was that his boyfriend? Husband? How serious were they? If they lived together it would explain why Gerard had such a big house. 

I hated crying over him. I hated it. But when I started to reflect on all the meaningful stuff he'd said, now realising it wasn't true, I couldn't help it. He'd changed me into this emotional mess. Before I'd met him, I hadn't even cried over movies, now it seemed I couldn't go a full week without having a full-on breakdown. Everything he said was bullshit, it was all a ploy. And for what? To get into my pants probably. I was so stupid for falling for it. 

I wiped my eyes and took some deep breaths. My pillow was damp now from all my sobbing and I had that familiar stuffy sensation in my sinuses. I sat up and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror opposite my bed. My eyes were glazed over and my nose was red, I looked pathetic. I loathed how I was now. I was still falling for Mr Way, but I couldn't help but hate his guts at the same time. 

I leaned over and grabbed my phone from the bedside table and unlocked it, no new texts. That wasn't a surprise. I pulled up my messages and composed a new one to Gerard. For a while I stared at the blank template, wondering what on earth to put. I wanted to meet up and tell him, as much as I dreaded it, but I didn't want to go to his house. If I was there and he flipped and – as unlikely as it seemed – got violent, I'd have nowhere to run. We needed to meet somewhere public, but somewhere where no-one from school would see us. The park came to mind, it was public, but still quiet, and I was sure nobody from school went there. It was about a twenty-minute walk from my house, but it was better than nothing, so I typed out a brief message: 

'I need to talk to you, can you meet me at the park near the school today?'

I hoped it didn't sound too suspicious, but it was urgent. Hopefully it would scare him into coming. He certainly wasn't busy since he replied within a minute. 

'Alright, I can be there in half an hour, is that okay? X'

I felt physically sick as I approached the meeting spot. I past the black fence surrounding the park and looked around. It was usually pretty quiet, but today no one was there. It was getting colder outside and there was a light mist hanging over everything. I'd been surprisingly quick getting here, which meant I'd have to spend even longer waiting. I sighed and went into one of the more secluded areas of the park and found a bench to sit on, sheltered under a row of trees. 

I found myself picking at the skin around my nails again, something I hadn't done in a while. The skin was just starting to heal properly, but now I was peeling away at it again. It was a nervous tick I'd developed a few years ago, a way to cope with getting yelled at or being sent out of class. I'd never had too much of a craving to do it recently, but when I was sitting in the cold on that bench with nothing else to do, it was comforting. 

The time it took for Gerard to get there was amplified by how cold I was. I only had a worn out hoodie on. I was shivering and rubbing at my hands, desperately trying to get some heat into me, when I heard footsteps on the path nearby. I turned and saw him approaching. He had a jeans and a leather jacket on over a basic grey t-shirt. My stomach tensed up and I couldn't find the words to greet him. 

“Hey.” He said as he got closer “Why don't you have a coat on?” He sat down next to me, putting his hands in his jacket pockets. 

“I uh...didn't think I'd need one.” My shoulders were stiff and my whole body was hunched over in an unwelcoming fashion. “I need to tell you something.” 

“Yeah... and what is that?” He seemed slightly anxious - as anyone would be when someone says that – but was trying to seem relaxed. 

“Please don't get mad at me.” I said, my leg bouncing. I couldn't look at him so instead averted my eyes to the ground at my feet. “It was an accident.” 

“What was an accident?” He leaned closer and looked at me. His eyes were almost boring a hole into the side of my head from how intense his stare was. His voice was heavy with anticipation. I'm not sure what the worst case scenario in this situation was for him, but this had to be pretty close to it. 

“I don't want to say.” 

He put his hand on my shoulder and gave a comforting squeeze, trying to persuade me into talking. “You can tell me.” He said. The warmth of his palm felt as if it was melting my skin. 

“I... well... the day I went to yours,” I began, taking a deep breath for precaution. The words were so hard to force out. The pressure on my chest made it hard to even take a breath and my throat had gone dry. “That morning, Ray saw our texts.” I didn't see his initial reaction as I was too embarrassed to look at him. 

“And?” 

“And... he knows. I'm sorry- I really am, but it's okay-” I tried giving him my most sincere look, begging him not to get angry, but it didn't work. 

“Jesus, Frank!” He exclaimed, taking his hand away from my shoulder and moving a few inches away from me in the process. “God, could you not be more careful?!” He raked his hand through his hair nervously and stared off at nothing, his eyes becoming vacant as if he was running over things in his mind. 

“I'm sorry, please- but he hasn't told anyone- I mean, he could've but he said he wouldn't!” 

“What? And you believe him? How do you know he'll keep quiet?” That was the thing, I didn't know. Ray knew something that could ruin both mine and Mr Way's lives. He told me he wouldn't tell, and he had the opportunity to when he was in Mrs Lattison's office, but maybe he was saving it for another time. “Oh my god.” Gerard groaned. 

“I can't do this anymore.” I said quietly. Gerard's gaze switched back to me and his attitude did a complete reverse. 

“What? No, look, it doesn't have to come to that-” he started. I was surprised he still wanted me seeing as we'd been found out. “-I mean, this would all be for nothing, right?” 

“It's not that.” I shook my head. I was on the verge of crying again. That seemed to be my new defence mechanism in tense situations. 

“Then what is it?” He asked, putting his hand on mine. I could tell he was nervous, but I wasn't sure if it was from the thought of getting in trouble for this or me leaving him. “I didn't mean to pressure you into anything, I swear, I wont ask you to do anything that makes you uncomfortable.” I pulled my hand away from his. 

“What am I to you?” I looked him in the eye. It was a straightforward question and I wanted a straightforward answer. 

“W-what?” he was taken aback. His voice changed momentarily from stern to flustered. “What do you mean?” I stared him down, He knew exactly what I meant. “Well...” he started, avoiding my eye. “I don't know if I could call you my boyfriend, but we're certainly have an... uh... intimate relationship.” 

“Who else?” I asked. It was his turn to get antsy now. I'd got through my confession, now I wanted to hear his. He gave me the most confused look, his eyes narrowing and his head cocking to the side. “Oh, don't give me that look.” I rolled my eyes. This was all part of his shtick. He'd probably put up the whole lonely, misunderstood teacher front whenever he tried to get someone into bed with him. 

“I don't know what you mean? Who else?” 

“Bullshit, I fucking saw you!” I was past upset now, I was just angry that he was denying it. 

“What? Saw me where? If you think that I'm out with another guy then-” 

“I saw with my own fucking eyes!” I exploded. How could he sit and lie straight to my face. I hated to admit it, but Ray was right. This guy really was manipulative. “At the mall a few months ago! You and some other guy- you kissed him!” 

I was expecting him to start running his mouth, to start denying it and getting angry and telling me I was wrong - maybe even to admit it - But he was stunned into silence. I could see the wheels turning in his head as he tried to cast his mind back. The silence was uncomfortable, I was so ready to jump into action in case he got angry, but instead he was strangely calm. 

“What did the guy look like?” He stared at me with his brows furrowed. 

“He was skinny... and he had brown hair and glasses... I think.” I was confused by his sudden composure. I couldn't tell what was going through his head or how he was feeling, which left me feeling helpless. He processed the information and immediately started cracking up. “What?” I asked nervously. He couldn't answer, he was keeled over with laughter. “What is it!?” 

“That's my brother, you idiot!” he sniggered, elbowing me in the side. Everything started to fall into place. His brother. His fucking brother. He hadn't been seeing anyone, which meant he hadn't been lying to me. All that stress and anger had been over nothing. 

“Frank, are you alright?” I'd been silent for over a minute, just going over all this in my head one more time. 

“You haven't been seeing anyone else?” I asked quietly. He smiled and shook his head. I felt so ridiculous. I'd been hysterical all day and punched Ray for no reason at all. I felt Gerard's arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer. “Gerard, not here.” I protested, looking around suspiciously. 

“There's no-one around, besides, you look cold.” I relaxed into his embrace, letting the warmth of his body gradually thaw my freezing skin. “Do you still want this to be over?” He asked anxiously. 

“No.” I let my eyes slide shut. I don't think I had the strength to. Even if he had been seeing someone else, all he'd have to do is put his arms around me like this and I'd never be able to let go. That scared me, the fact that I'd become so dependant on him. I'd never been so completely infatuated with anyone before, I craved his touch constantly and he was always on my mind. I hated to think what would happen if we ever did get caught by a higher power.


	24. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank is very frustrated

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MY LONG AWAITED RETURN  
> this is a long one, about 3000 words, lucky you.   
> This chapter was brought to you by procrastination and putting off revision for my French exam

I wanted to make things right with Ray. I had to apologise face to face, even though I already had in Mrs Lattison's office. I wanted to make sure he knew it was sincere. I also needed to thank him for keeping quiet about Gerard and I. I wasn't entirely sure where he stood on that subject – if he really hated the idea of me being with him or not. Surely if he didn't he would've told – but I'd started to wonder over the weekend whether or not he was saving it for something else. Ray wasn't usually the type to hold grudges, but this secret was the perfect thing to use for blackmail. It would ruin both of our lives. 

So after chemistry, while everyone was packing up, I pulled him aside. He hadn't spoken to me all day and the tension was killing me. 

“Hey, can we talk?” I asked after he'd picked up his bag to put his books away. 

“About what?” He didn't bother looking at me. 

I looked around anxiously and lowered my voice. “About what happened.” 

“There's nothing to talk about.” He said bluntly, finally making eye contact. 

“Look, just meet me at the bench at lunch, okay?” I couldn't go into any more detail while there were people around, so I just rolled my eyes and picked up my bag, promptly leaving. 

For the first time in what felt like weeks, I didn't feel a knee-buckling sense of dread, fear or excitement on my way to the art department - I was mostly neutral. Of course, I had a slight smile on my face when I saw Gerard – as anyone would when they saw their romantic interest. I couldn't exactly call him my boyfriend because it didn't feel like a normal relationship. Normal people in normal relationships wouldn't have to keep it a secret. 

“Frank, you're late.” 

“Oh... sorry.” I had no idea how I was always late. I thought I walked at a pretty normal pace and I always leave at the same time as everyone else – yet I was always last into the class. 

“If you're late again I'm gonna have to punish you.” He said with a certain emphasise on the last half of the sentence. My eyes shot down at the floor and I sank down into my seat. Was that deliberately flirtatious or was it just my over-active imagination? Ever since we'd gone all the way I just wanted to be on top of him at all times – it was becoming a real problem. I hadn't even got so much as a kiss from him for at least a week and it was driving me crazy. 

My frustration was starting to come out in other aspects of my life too. I was getting grumpy and snappy at people and I was finding it hard to focus. It was affecting my art too. I hadn't noticed at first, but throughout the lesson my drawing had started to become more and more frantic until I was scraping the pencil back and forth across the page. I only stopped to notice the giant mess I'd made when my pencil lead broke. I hadn't been paying attention, and now the shading on the body was all wrong. I sighed as I realised I'd probably have to start again. I accepted my giant mistake and was about to get up when Mr Way appeared in front of my desk. 

He didn't say anything at first, just picked up the drawing and the printed image I was copying from and inspected both of them. “The style of this is very different from your other pieces.” He said, his eyes flickering from page to page. 

“How do you mean?” Of course it was different, it barely looked like a person any more, just a load of spiky, block-y shapes. 

“This is more abstract.” He said, setting the paper down. “I like it.” 

I felt my heart throb as he said that. It was such a simple thing to say, and I'd probably shrug it off it was from anybody else, but it meant so much coming from him. 

“I don't think these pencils are giving it justice though,” he added, putting his hands on his hips and looking down at the drawings laid out on my desk - all of them an amateur attempt at realism except the latest. “I think you could achieve something like this more easily with charcoal.” He tapped on the paper with his finger. I'd never anticipated doing anything except for pencil drawings, and I'd never used charcoal before – wasn't that the stuff you put on barbecues? 

“I've never used it before.” I stated, looking up at him eagerly. “What's it like?” 

“Come and I'll show you.” He gave me that famous lopsided smile of his before making his way to the back of the room. There was a large grey door there which I often saw him wandering in and out of, which I'd assumed was just for storage. He took his lanyard from round his neck and slotted the key in the door, opening it and turning on the light. 

It was a relatively small room, a little bigger than a pantry, with shelves lining each side stacked high with random art utensils. He then proceeded to step inside and close the door behind us. “Now, where did I put them?” He murmured under his breath, scanning the shelves for what I assumed was charcoal. I took a step further into the closet and looked around; there were big pots of clay and lots of boxes with shipping information on the side, there were stacks of paper in a variety of sizes and colours, tubes of unopened paint and a load of other things that added to the mess. He clearly didn't keep this cupboard in it's utmost condition. 

I heard a disgruntled groan from behind me as he started rummaging through things, pushing things out the way as he went. He had his back turned, so I instinctively glanced down at his ass. I was always thankful that he wore such tight trousers, he pulled them off so well. 

“I can't find anything in this damn place” he mumbled as his search became more frustrated. It was at that moment when I noticed the worn cardboard box on the very top shelf marked 'charcoals & chalk' in black marker pen. Unfortunately, high shelves and I have never worked well with each other, so even when I stretched up on my tip-toes I had no chance of reaching. I was about to turn round when I felt Gerard's chest against my back. Before I could react he had reached up and pulled the box off of the shelf. He was only there for a second, but it was enough to remind me of how long it had been since I'd gotten off.

“Yep, these are the ones.” He nodded, pulling a small pack of charcoal out of the box before setting it on the floor. “These are the good kind.” He examined the package in the dim light, turning it to look at the label on the back. I didn't care about the stupid charcoals. I hadn't touched another actual human being for what felt like ages, and having him there - all to myself – seemed like the perfect opportunity to get some physical contact. 

I took the package out of his hands in the middle of his sentence, which made him stop abruptly and shoot me a puzzled look. I threw it over my shoulder and heard it land on the concrete floor with a quiet thud. “Frank!” He hissed, trying to keep his voice low as there was a room full of students just through the door. At that point, I couldn't of cared less. For the past two weeks I'd been thinking of all the ways I wanted him to fuck me. Sure, I thought about sex a lot when I was a virgin, but now once I'd had someone to project those fantasies onto, it was almost constant. 

However, I was still new to all this, and I was definitely still shy around Mr Way. So I started out slow. Before he could attempt to pick it up I took his tie in my hand, running the fabric through my fingers. He froze in place and glanced down at my hand, then at me. I smirked up at him sheepishly, trying not to show how nervous I actually was. I bit my bottom lip and moved my hand further up, watching him as I did so.

“What are you doing?” He whispered. 

“Come on.” Was all I could say, because I was afraid that anything else would show how desperate and needy I actually was. He hadn't pushed me away yet, so I continued by putting my other hand on his shoulder, letting it rest for a second before ever so slowly moving it down to his chest. 

“Frank.” He sighed, going to move my hand away. 

“Please,” I whined, trying to sound as sensual as possible. I had no idea what else to do, so I decided to press my face into his chest and move my hand further down. “It's been so long.” I groaned, finding the crook in his neck and and resting my forehead against it. I moved my hand further down, pausing just above his belt buckle. I heard him take a deep breath, clearly trying to keep his composure. Fuck it, if I had to act desperate to get him riled up, then I would. 

“Frank, not here.” He whispered, putting his hand on my shoulder. I moved my hand further now until it was just grazing his crotch, a smile tugging at my lips when I realised he was hard. “I will – just anywhere but here.” I didn't want to wait, I was already turned on, and so was he. 

I took hold of his tie again, backing up against the back wall and pulling him up against me. I almost didn't hear the satisfied groan escape his lips as our hips pressed together. “Come on, Mr Way.” I moaned, running my hands all up the front of his shirt. “I miss you.” I hoped to god this was working, because I was already so embarrassed - and god, I wanted him. I looked up at his face, he was biting his lip and his cheeks were flushed. It was starting to get hot in the room and I felt my collar sticking to the back of my neck. 

“Please, Mr Way.” I whined again, my lips connecting with his jaw and my hand running through the back of his hair.

“Jesus, don't say that.” He whispered, his words coming out low and raspy.

“Why?” My breath was hot against his neck. I had no idea what I was doing, I was raking my hands through his hair and up his back and along his chest, anywhere where I was sure he liked. “Do you like it when I call you by that name?” I was begging for it now, but I could tell it was working. 

“Just don't do it” he panted, his chest rising and falling against mine. I pressed my hips into his, this time earning an audible moan, just quiet enough so the class wouldn't hear. I smirked and pulled his collar down, biting at his neck. I'd never done this to anyone before, how was I so good at it? 

“They'll be waiting for us coming out.” Gerard protested again, still not pulling away from me. 

He had his palms flat out against the wall at either side of me, allowing me to take full control. “Who cares.” I mumbled, pulling at his shirt. I was so overcome with lust that I didn't care who heard. 

“Frank-”  
I thought he was going to push me away again so I grabbed him by his collar and pressed our lips together. He kissed back this time, moving his lips against mine. We were both hot and sweaty and our clothes were no doubt a mess. I was completely oblivious to the class outside – that didn't matter, the only thing that I cared about in that moment was Gerard's lips against mine and our bodies pressed together. 

I was dragged back into reality once he pulled away, the space between us now filling with cool air. “I can't-” he panted “They could walk in.” He whispered. His lips were shiny and his hair was all sticking up at the back. I'd pulled some of his shirt out of his trousers too, and his erection was glaringly obvious. 

“We'll be quiet” I promised, trying to pull him back over to me, wanting that space to be filled by him again. 

“I'll get in trouble!” he hissed

“They'll never know, come on.” 

Before either of us could say anything else, the bell rang. We both froze, staring at each other as the sound of chairs scraping back came from the other side of the door. How long had we been in here for? The thought struck me. It couldn't of been more than ten minutes surely. There were faint sounds of people chatting, chairs moving and the door slamming, until it all went quiet. 

“What period is it?” I asked, still panting a little. 

“It's break.” 

My smirk returned and I pulled him towards me again. “Does that mean...” I didn't even need to finish my sentence. I saw him sigh and go to say something.

“I want you to fuck me.” 

Whatever he was going to say had left his mind completely as he stood there blinking at me, his mouth opening and closing slightly. “W-what?” He asked. 

I bit my lip and looked up at him through my lashes. “Fuck me against this wall, Mr Way” I whispered, my hands gliding down his chest. He didn't need to be told a third time as he pulled me into a kiss. I smiled against his lips, feeling accomplished now that I'd successfully seduced someone. Especially someone as collected as him.

I tugged at his shirt, pulling it out of his trousers so I could run my hands over the skin of his lower back. His lips left mine but soon made their way across my jaw and down my neck. I let out a satisfied sigh and closed my eyes, letting him put his hands and mouth all over me. I fumbled around for his belt buckle, trying to get it undone. He noticed I was struggling and reached down to do it himself. I bit my lip and pulled my jeans down past my knee's, feeling the cool air round my legs. I watched in suspense as he undid the button on his trousers and unzipped. I turned round and put my hands against the wall so my back was facing him. 

“What are you doing?” He panted

“I want you to do it like this.” I ordered, arching my back and pushing my ass out. 

It didn't take long before I felt his hands moving up my back again, his erection pressing up against my ass. I whined quietly, pressing up against him. “Just do it.” I reached back and pulled my boxers down. 

“Fuck.” He groaned. I didn't care how needy I sounded, I had been waiting for this for so long, and I felt like we'd been in his closet for hours. Before I could tell him to hurry up again, he was there, pushing inside me. 

I never got over that initial pain, and the fact that he had no lube didn't help. “Ah-” I cried, squeezing my eyes shut. He stopped for a second but I urged him on, pressing back even further onto him. It was all worth it though as after a few thrusts, that pleasure I'd felt the first time came rushing back. I let out a drawn out moan and rested my forehead against the wall. 

“You're such a tease.” Gerard groaned, one hand holding my hip and the other tugging at the fabric on the front of my shirt. 

I didn't even attempt to reply, I could only groan and whine and push my hips back into his. 

I had said so many dirty things to him today that my moans didn't seem all that embarrassing any more. “Don't stop- please- oh god-” I pleaded, my sentences interrupted by my own gasps. All the times I'd jerked off to him at three AM were nothing compared to the pleasure I got from him actually being there.

“Harder.” I moaned, resting my head on my forearm. My whole body jolted each time he pushed forward and my knees were starting to shake. I felt as if they were going to give way at any moment when I felt both his hands move to my hips, steadying me. No matter how hard I tried to keep quiet, I still let out a whimper whenever he hit that spot inside me. I was begging him not to stop although it was pretty clear he had no intention to. 

I think I got the most pleasure when I heard him moaning. When I heard him utter my name and pull me closer, I couldn't help but smile. He didn't stop there, though, he kept saying it at the end of each sentence. “Frank, god-” he whispered under his breath. I felt that pulsing sensation at the bottom of my stomach whenever he said it, that was definitely a sound I'd remember later on. 

We were both a mess towards the end. My knees had started to buckle under me and I had one hand tangled in my own hair and my moans had turned into high pitched whines - that was always a sign that I was close to finishing. Gerard was getting more and more desperate and at one point I felt him leaning his forehead against my shoulder. 

“I'm so close.” he mumbled in my ear. 

I couldn't reply as he slammed into me one more time, making me jolt and shudder and arch my back. I couldn't bear it much longer. He thrust once, twice, three times more before I came. My whole body shook and I couldn't help but cry out. It was even better than the first time. 

Just as I'd finished coming down from my orgasm, I realised that Gerard had already finished and was pulling up his boxers and trousers. I turned round, leaning against the wall and gazing up at him. I was sweating so much that my shirt was stuck to my back. 

“Here.” He said, taking a rag from the shelf and handing it to me. I looked down at it, then back at him. 

“What am I 'sposed to do with this?”   
“Clean yourself up.” 

“Ew.” I looked down at it. It was stained with paint and god knows what else. 

“You're the one who wanted to do it in here.” He said, tucking his shirt back in and attempting to fix his hair. 

I reluctantly wiped my trembling thighs before pulling my trousers up. I was definitely going to be chafing for the rest of the day. 

“You look a state” he said. 

“Thanks.” 

He was right though, my shirt was all dishevelled and my hair was stuck to my forehead with sweat. I was a hot, sticky, mess. I would've just sorted my clothes and left, when I felt his hand on my cheek. He tilted my head upwards so I could look at him before planting a delicate kiss on my lips. It brought back that tingling feeling again, not the tingling I got when we had sex, but that childish, nervous, giddy sensation in my stomach. I stared up at him for a few seconds, a little taken aback by such a sweet gesture. We'd just been fucking a minute ago, now this. How the hell was I going to focus for the rest of the day?


	25. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank and Ray finally talk

I'd managed to clean myself up as best I could in the bathroom before the bell for fourth period went. I'd relieved some of my sexual tension, but I was still nervous about talking to Ray at lunch. I couldn't help but tap my fingers on the desk and bounce my leg through my classes as I thought of what to say, to the annoyance of my teachers. Would I just come outright and ask what his deal was with Mr Way and I? Or would I just hint at the idea? It didn't matter what I thought, either way my mind kept drifting back to what I'd just been doing in Mr Way's classroom. God, that had to have been the most daring and irrational thing I'd ever done – and I've done quite a few stupid things in my short time on this earth. 

It meant I didn't have much time to dwell on the subject, and I still hadn't figured out what to say by the time lunch rolled around. Since when did I start planning what I was going to say to people in advance? Had I really become that much of a nervous wreck? I told myself to act natural as I made my way over to the bench. Ray was my best friend after all, we'd known each other for years, I should be able to talk to him. 

“Hey.” I said bluntly as I approached. He pulled out one earphone and looked up at me, squinting in the sunlight and looking unfazed as ever. 

“Hi.” 

He gestured to the empty spot on the bench next to him before stuffing his earphones into his pocket.

“Look, I think we both know what we need to talk about” I said, dropping my bag down by my side. 

“I don't know what you mean.” He replied without looking at me “I thought we'd already apologised in Mrs Lattison's office.” 

I rolled my eyes and sighed. He didn't sound the same since our fight. Everything he said was always sharp and passive aggressive, like he didn't really believe what he was saying. 

“I need you to know that I really am sorry.” I said, trying to sound as sincere as possible. “I want to be friends again.” There were a few seconds where he didn't look at me, when I thought he was going to laugh or snigger or tell me to piss off. He didn't though, he just sat there in silence for a moment. 

“I am you friend, Frank.” He said, his voice returning to that familiar, friendly tone. “I'm not angry at you.” 

A weight was lifted from my chest and my heart soared, a feeling I'd only heard about in books. 

“So- you mean, you're not still mad about...” I paused and bit my lip, not wanting to say it out loud. “Mr Way... and...” I trailed off. Even saying it aloud made me skittish. 

“Jesus!” Ray groaned, shaking his head and recoiling a little in disgust. “You guys aren't still a thing are you? I thought you'd learned your lesson!” 

“What do you mean, learned my lesson?” I felt a stab of pain, I couldn't help but feel hurt by the way he said that. It was almost as if he viewed this as a childish phase. Sure, it was stupid and irresponsible, but it happened, and I was trying my best to handle it in the most mature way possible.  
“You guys will not work, Frank, it can't work. You should know that!” 

I did believe that Ray was worried for my safety, of course he was, but I still felt that pang of annoyance at how much he babied me. This wasn't a big deal to me, so why was it to him? I wanted to scream and shout and tell him it was nothing to do with him, but I wanted to be friends again, so I put it to rest. 

“I know it sounds dumb, but can we just get past that for the moment? I don't want to fall out over this.” I lowered my voice and took on a consoling tone, trying to calm him down subliminally and hopefully changing the subject. 

“How can you just brush it off like that?” His voice lowered too, but it wasn't any less harsh. “What you're doing is wrong! It's illegal! It could ruin his life.” 

It was that moment that I just so happened to glance over Ray's shoulder and notice Hannah approaching, arm in arm with another girl. I quickly re-arranged myself, turning away from Ray slightly and clearing my throat - an obvious attempt to be inconspicuous. Ray was slightly better at acting than me, and greeted Hannah with a smile and a wave. 

“This is Amy.” She announced, nudging her friend. “I told her she could eat lunch with us, is that okay?” 

“Yeah, sure.” 

The girl was quite a bit shorter than Hannah, with a slight figure and a round face framed by curly blonde hair. She stood with her feet pointed inwards and her arms straight at her sides awkwardly. The way her lip was curled at the corners and her eyes darted around made it obvious she was nervous. 

“This is Frank and Ray.” Hannah smiled, pointing to each of us before forcing a space between Ray and I to sit herself down in. I suddenly dreaded moving away from Ray now as I realised I'd have to sit beside Amy. Not only that, but Hannah and Ray had already broke off into their own conversation, leaving and awkward silence between the newcomer and I. 

She was still for a while, but eventually she bent down and produced her lunch box from her bag and oh-so-delicately began to unwrap her sandwiches. Everything about her seemed so pretty and prim – to the way she straightened her skirt and tie when she sat down to the way her books were so neatly stacked in her bag. I wondered how she and Hannah knew each other. 

“I've not seen you around before.” I mumbled, scratching the back of my neck as I scrambled for something to say. 

“Oh, yeah.” My question took her by surprise as she stared at me with her eyes wide open. “I used to work at the library at lunch and break, so I was usually there.” Her voice was exactly how you'd picture it to be – high-pitched and wavering. 

“Oh... cool.” Our conversation ran dry again. She seemed like she'd shatter if I so much as touched her so I didn't want to intrude too much. I didn't like having four of us here, the bench was getting crowded and the armrest was digging into my side. As nice as Amy seemed, I kind of hoped this was only temporary. I knew if she stuck around for too long that her and I would get lumped together while Ray and Hannah went off and did their own thing. For now I'd just have to suck it up and pretend it didn't bother me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eh, this isn't a very good chapter, but Ray and Frank needed some resolution. I'm already onto writing the next one so just stay tuned


	26. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank is feeling neglected.

It was nearing exam time, and it seemed like I was seeing less and less of Mr Way every day. Whenever I was in his class he was rushing around the room, rummaging around in folders and sifting through piles of work. He probably had a lot of work to do, as did everyone at this time of year, so I didn't want to disturb him. There were a few times I thought of staying behind - just to talk - but whenever I looked up at him he was drowning in piles of books. It was probably best if I left him alone. He didn't even address the class any more, let alone me. It was always 'you've all got stuff to be doing, get on with it'.

 

Still, I couldn't help but feel a little upset about it, like all the fun had been wiped out of our relationship – if you could call it that. I felt like he hadn't so much as looked at me in weeks. It started to make me wonder if he'd gotten bored of me. I couldn't blame myself, wouldn't anyone question that after being ignored for so long?

 

Maybe I was just over thinking things, or being too clingy – melodramatic, I think it's called. Gerard was busy, he'd talk to me when he had the time, at least that's what I told myself.

 

On one particular day, I'd left my art stuff at home by accident, leaving me with nothing to do except stare out the window – or even better, at Gerard. His hair was all messy and stringy, like he hadn't brushed it properly, and he had dark circles under his eyes. He was constantly rubbing his face and sighing and slamming his pencil down frustratedly throughout the class. All I wanted to do was rush over and give him a hug, but above all I didn't want to be annoying.

 

He hadn't questioned the fact that I had no work in front of me, even though he got so hung up about it at the start of the year. Usually he'd say something blunt and sarcastic and give me that stupid, disappointed look. At this rate, I was lucky if I got so much as a quick glance. I was feeling pretty neglected, so I did what I always do when I want attention – I acted up.

 

I tried subtle little things at first, like _accidentally_ forgetting my art folder. When I was in class, I sat splayed out as obnoxiously as possible – arm draped round the back of the chair and legs spread apart. I still wasn't getting him to look at me though, so I plugged my earphones in and turned my music up all the way, so much that it was _definitely_ noticeable. A few girls looked up from their paper and shot me dirty looks, but I stared straight at Gerard.

 

He didn't seem to notice at first. That, or he just decided to ignore it, hoping I'd stop. I closed my eyes and let my head roll back. If there was anything I was talented at, it was being annoying.

 

It didn't take long for him to get tired of it, because I had only gotten about a minute or so into the song before my earphones were yanked out.

 

“Hey!” I whined, a little too loudly as I still hadn't adjusted to the actual volume of the room.

 

“Give me your phone.” He demanded, holding his hand out. My plan had worked, I'd riled him up, now what?

 

“No.” I pouted, holding it close to my chest.

 

“Give me it now or I'm sending you out.”

 

That wasn't a playful threat. There was no subtle hint behind that statement, that was him in teacher mode. He was looking at me like any other annoying pupil, and I didn't like it. As pathetic as it sounded, I missed when he gave me special attention, back when he'd loom over my shoulder as I drew and talked me through the work and told me I could come after school if I needed any extra help.

 

I paused my music and handed the phone over reluctantly, then watched as he strode over to his desk and shoved it into a drawer, slamming it a little too aggressively.

 

“Can I get it at the end of the period?” I asked eagerly.

 

“You can get it at the end of the day.” He sat down and picked up his pen again, resuming his work. “Now sit up properly and do something.”

 

I should have been happy to see him after school, that's what I wanted, wasn't it? So why was my stomach turning as I left Spanish that afternoon? I was used to teachers speaking to me harshly, but when Mr Way so much as hinted at being angry with me, my heart shattered. I couldn't handle it when _he_ yelled at me.

 

The halls were empty as I made my way to art at the end of the day. I thought about not turning up altogether, but I needed my phone. Maybe he wouldn't be angry, maybe he'd just give me it quickly so I could leave. That's what I told myself when I pushed open his classroom door.

 

When I entered, he was sitting behind his desk, hunched over a pile of books. He looked up as the door slammed behind me. I opened my mouth to utter a simple hello, but he quickly interrupted me.

 

“Shut up.”

 

I froze with my mouth still half-open, scared of even moving. His gaze was so cold, as if it could pierce right through me. He paused for a while, almost daring me to answer, but I was stunned into silence.

 

“I see what you're doing.” He said, never taking his eyes off me. “You think I haven't noticed that you're slacking off in class all day? That your work is slowly getting worse and worse?”

 

I didn't like this. I didn't want him to be angry at me, I just wanted him to pay attention to me.

 

“Gerard, I-”

 

“No. You call me Mr Way in here.”

 

I felt a stab of pain in my gut, but I pressed on, “Mr Way, I was just-”

 

“You were just trying to draw attention to yourself?” He saw right through everything I had been doing. I was completely transparent. I squirmed under his gaze, feeling vulnerable and utterly ridiculous. I really hoped he didn't think I was childish.

 

“I've been busy. Exams are coming up, I have other kids to worry about.”

 

I was just some other kid to him.

 

“I'm suffocating under all this work and the last thing I need is you disrupting everyone else's time.”

 

I was annoying him.

 

“I can't be here to feed you attention whenever you want.”

He thought I was an attention seeker.

 

“Look...”

 

He paused for a moment, running a hand through his hair and finally moving his gaze from me to the ground. I didn't know what was coming, but I knew it was going to be bad.

 

“I think we should just spend some time apart for a while.”

 

I didn't think my heart could sink any lower, but it did. I stuttered, unable to form the start of any sentence. What did he mean? Was he breaking up with me? Whenever I heard that phrase used in films and TV shows it always meant permanently. I turned away, trying not to let him see the tears springing to my eyes. I heard him sigh and the chair creak as he stood up.

 

“This is gonna do us both good.” He began, trying to put on a soothing tone. “I think we both need a little break.”

 

I couldn't listen to him, I knew I was going to start crying if he said anything else. I pulled the door open and hurried out, covering my mouth to stop myself from sobbing. I didn't hear him call after me, I didn't hear his footsteps following behind, there was only the sound of my own ragged breathing and the doors slamming behind me as I ran further and further away from his room.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aw this is a sad one, but it's not over just yet


	27. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank is hung up about Gerard.

I didn't want to let myself get upset by him, but it wasn't that easy.

 

I used to think I was a strong person, but ever since I'd started this thing with Mr Way I'd proved myself wrong. I'd done more crying over the past few weeks than I had in the last few years of my life. Now I thought of myself as a pathetic, emotional, little boy.

 

I'd just managed to hold back my tears until I got home and into the safety of my room. I didn't even bother to change out of my uniform, I didn't have the strength. All I could do was crawl under the covers and curl up into a ball. My bones felt heavy, and as soon as I settled into a position I found it hard to move again, so I stayed there. I cried and cried until my eyes stung and my pillow went damp - and when I couldn't cry any more, I fell asleep.

 

I couldn't bring myself to get out of bed the next day. I couldn't bear to see Gerard again and I couldn't face school when I felt so utterly broken down. The very thought of stepping into his classroom made me want to heave – would I ever be able to do it again? I would have to ask Mrs Lattison to move me into another class.

 

So I didn't bother going into school, instead I tried to sleep. As long as I was sleeping, I couldn't think about him. Although, after a few hours I kept waking up and I began to find it more and more difficult to get back into that deep sleep. So I dragged myself out of bed and stumbled downstairs into the kitchen. I automatically started searching in the fridge for something to eat. I didn't _want_ to, and I wasn't feeling hungry, but I knew I had to. Besides, it was something to do. 

 

My whole body still felt heavy, and even lifting my arms took quite a bit of effort. I didn't know exactly how I felt about it any more, I just felt numb. Maybe this  _was_ best for us. I'd had my fun, he'd had his, it was better to end it like this than to get found out by the school or the police. Ray was right, it was irresponsible. 

 

I was just about to head back to bed when there was a knock at the door. I stood in my hall for a moment, wondering who the hell could be knocking at four in the afternoon and questioning whether or not it would be worth answering. If it was a door-to-door salesman then I'd have to sacrifice a good ten minutes of sleeping time trying to get them away. On the other hand, it could be something important, why else would someone come by like this? Eventually – after that brief dilemma in my head - I plucked up the courage to open the door.

 

It wasn't a door-to-door salesman - to my surprise. It was in fact Ray, Hannah and their new companion Amy.

 

“Oh, uh, what're you doing here?” I stuttered. My throat was dry from all the crying I'd done and made my voice raspy.

 

“We've come to see you, obviously.” Ray stated, looking me up and down. “Have you only just woke up?”

 

“No.” I lied, although my tousled hair and pyjama bottoms made it obvious.

 

“Why didn't you come in today? You missed the experiment we did in chemistry, Mr Walken nearly set the place on fire.”

 

“I just wasn't feeling good.” My eyes flickered between Ray, Hannah and Amy, trying not to settle too long in case they knew I was lying.

 

“Alright then,” Ray nodded, not sounding completely convinced “Are you coming to the mall? We've gotta go pick up some stuff.”   
  
I felt my entire body throb at the thought of walking around for the rest of the day. “Dude, look, I-” I started, but Ray went on.

 

“Aw come on, man. You don't look all that sick. It'll be boring without you.” He smiled assuringly. I was sure they'd have plenty of fun without me, but getting out of the house would probably put my mind off Mr Way, so I quickly got changed into my regular t-shirt-and-jeans combo and headed out.

 

I was quiet for most of the journey there, and even more so when we walked around the different shops so Ray could run errands. Amy and I were usually left trailing behind as Ray and Hannah walked arm in arm. The only time I was moderately satisfied was when we sat down to eat, and yet again, I was forced to sit beside Amy.

 

She didn't say much at all, and only really joined in the conversation when Hannah spoke to her, but I'd occasionally glance over and catch her staring, to which she'd blush and look away and fumble around with the sleeves on her jumper. She only said a few sentences at a time, mostly she just hid behind her fringe and giggled occasionally at something Ray or I said.

 

“Frank, you're into art, right?” Hannah pulled me out of my daydream.

 

“Oh... uh, not really.”

 

“That's bullshit!” Ray spat through a mouthful of fries. “I've seen his drawings, they're so good.”

 

I was about to protest when Hannah interrupted us both. “Well Amy loves painting, don't you?” She turned to her friend.

 

“Yeah.” She smiled nervously and twirled a blonde lock of hair through her fingers.

 

“Oh, are we in the same art class?” I hoped to god we weren't, I'd feel like a dick if I'd seen her every day for the entire term without acknowledging her. Although, I don't think anyone could hold it against me.

 

“No, I have Mrs Weir.”

 

Thank god.

 

I wasn't sure if Hannah was deliberately drawing similarities between Amy and I, but she was always bringing up topics for us to discuss. It was starting to become desperate at times as she tried to imply Amy would be interested in seeing my drawings. I was sick of it all, why did I get shoved with the weird kid? It was hard enough pretending I was okay, now I had to be extra nice to Hannah's friend.

 

I was so engrossed in trying to keep up a conversation with Amy that I didn't notice we were being watched. In fact, I had no clue until I'd got home that night and checked my phone. Somehow I hadn't heard it go off, because I had a text from Gerard from hours before.

 

_'I saw you today.'_

 

I furrowed my brows and glared down at the screen as I tried to work out what tone that was written in. He'd seen me at the mall, alright, but why did he feel the need to tell me? Was this some half-assed attempt to kick up a conversation?

 

I typed out a reply, and was about to hit send, when I had a second thought. He'd been so horrible to me the other day, and now he'd gone out of his way to text me something as trivial as this. He hadn't apologised, or explained himself, or even elaborated on what he'd said.

 

I didn't need to reply. He didn't deserve one. I really wanted to talk to him, but I felt some sort of gratification knowing that he was probably waiting for a reply that would never come. I deleted all the texts from him and put my phone away. Out of sight, out of mind, right?

 

 


	28. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank gets in trouble again.

I'd spent two days off, but it didn't seem like enough. My mom refused to let me stay home longer as she didn't see anything wrong with me. Besides, I couldn't stay off forever. I had art first period, so my nerves were all over the place by the time I reached the building. I tried going to Mrs Lattison's office, but one of the secretaries told me she was out of school for the day at a meeting. So not only did I have to face Mr Way for the first time since our breakup, I had to show up fifteen minutes late.

 

I tried to sneak in as quietly as possible, and it almost worked. When I entered he had his back turned and was talking to one of the pupils. I closed the door gently behind me and was almost at my desk when he called my name.

 

“Frank, how nice of you to join us.”

 

I prayed that he didn't see me jump. I had been on edge all day and the last thing I wanted was the whole class – including him – staring at me. I didn't reply to him, just sat down in my seat and took my drawing out of my bag. I held my breath as I heard his footsteps approaching behind me.

 

“So you've brought your stuff today?” He mumbled, looking over my shoulder. I nodded and tightened my grip on my pencil, just wishing he'd go away. He wasn't that close to me, but I could sense his presence. There was a few seconds of silence where I could almost feel his eyes scouring over me. I felt myself starting to sweat, and was on the verge of jumping up and running out the room, when I finally heard his shoes squeak on the floor as he turned and resumed his pacing around the classroom.

 

I tried to stay focused on the work in front of me. I was actually getting somewhere in this subject and I didn't want to slip up now. However it was pretty hard to pay attention to anything when any slight movement from Mr Way caught my eye. I was constantly eyeing him and checking that he wasn't looking at me - which he never was - He seemed pretty enveloped in the books he was marking. Part of me was actually a little disappointed. I wanted to believe that he still had feelings for me, that maybe he would want me back. To be honest, I didn't know how I handled the first seventeen years of my life without having someone there to be affectionate with. After I had a taste of what a real relationship felt like, I never wanted to give it up.

 

I shook my head once I realised I'd been staring for far too long, and tried to bring myself back into reality. I picked up my pencil again, and was about to press it to the paper, when the door opened. Of course, my senses were on red alert that day, so I had to look up and see who it was.

 

I regretted it instantly, as I saw it was Amy.

 

She was wearing one of the few stained aprons that belonged to the department as well as a pair of plastic gloves.

 

“I was wondering if you had any more modelling clay? Mrs Weir doesn't have any.” She mumbled, one hand on the door as if she was about to dart out at the first sign of danger. Mr Way got up from his desk and said something indecipherable before gesturing for her to follow him. She scurried behind him as he passed my desk, heading towards the cupboard at the back of the room. I pretended to be working, but I just so happened to look up at the worst possible time.

 

“Hey, Frankie” she smiled as we locked eyes.

 

“Hey.”

 

I saw Gerard's head turn in my peripheral vision, but he didn't stop. He opened the door to the closet, but didn't shut it behind him. Amy stood by and watched eagerly as he lifted a large container of clay from the shelf and set down it on the floor. It was strange seeing someone else standing there with him, knowing what we'd done in that very room.

 

I was gasping for a smoke by lunchtime. All my nerves had been building up all day and it kicked off my cravings. I hadn't actually had one in a while, I didn't feel the need for them. I was always distracted by something else. But today, of all days, I was desperate.

 

I headed to our regular spot, smirking to myself when I saw the bench was free. I sat down and pulled out my fresh box of cigarettes, my hands trembling as I tore off the plastic packaging. I put one between my lips and lit it, letting my eyes close as the smoke filled my lungs for the first time.

 

“I didn't know you smoked.”

 

When I opened my eyes, that _girl_ was there again. 

 

“Yeah, so?”

 

She blushed a little and sat down beside me, leaving a space between us. There was a long pause where none of us spoke, but there was some kind of heavy tension. Like we both had something on our minds.

 

“Where's Ray and Hannah?” I asked, tilting my head up so I could blow smoke up into the air.

 

“Oh, they're rehearsing for their music exam.” She said, fiddling with the pleats on her skirt. Great, it was just us two. It's not like I hated Amy or anything - she seemed like a lovely girl to be honest - we just didn't seem to have any rapport. Keeping up a conversation with her was like swimming with a lead weight. I was constantly struggling for things to say.

 

“What's it like?” She asked.

 

“What?”

 

“Smoking... what's it like?”

 

I turned to face her and caught her eyes flickering from me to the cigarette in my hand. She was the typical good girl, you could tell immediately by the way she held herself. So why was she curious about something like that?

 

“Well there's not much to say about it. It's just something I do.” I shrugged, taking another drag. She bit her lip and fumbled with the hem of her skirt again, a nervous tick that I noticed she'd had.

 

“Um... could I try it?”

 

I sniggered and shot her a puzzled look. I wasn't being intentionally mean, I was just a bit fed up and she was too easy to make fun of. “What would you wanna do that for?” I asked, taking the cigarette from between my lips and twirling it in my fingers. “You don't seem like the type.” I was probably the idealistic bad-boy that she could use to get back at her parents or some shit.

 

“I just wanna try it at least once.” She mumbled, looking at the ground in shame.

 

I did feel slightly guilty for being harsh, I was taking out my anger on her after all, so I took one last breath before holding the cigarette out to her. She lifted her head and took it between her thumb and index finger and I noticed how perfectly painted her nails were. I watched intently as she put it between her lips and took a deep breath.

 

Instantly she started coughing and spluttering, covering her mouth and holding the cigarette away at arms length. “Don't inhale that much, you've never done it before!” I laughed, taking it back for fear she might drop it “Are you alright?” I didn't want to pat her on the back in case I unintentionally hurt her, So I sat awkwardly and watched as she hacked and coughed.

 

“Are you okay now?”

 

“It burnt my throat.” She said with watery eyes. “How can you do that?” She reached into her bag for her water bottle, fumbling to get the lid off before she took a sip.

 

“You get used to it.” I glanced down at the cigarette and noticed the pink lipstick stain at the end. I hesitated, only for a moment, before taking another puff. She had regained her composure just in time for me to notice my Spanish teacher racing towards us.

 

“Frank Iero!” She'd clearly just come outside to get something from her car and caught me red-handed, something that had happened a few times before. Why the hell did we sit so close to the car park again?

 

“Fuck.” I gasped under my breath, dropping the cigarette to the ground and stamping it out with my foot – but it was too late. She'd already seen me.

 

“Again? I thought Mrs Lattison had spoken to you about smoking on school premises.” She said, pointing a finger at me. “And you, what's your name?” She turned her attention to Amy, who looked as if she was seconds away from crying.

 

“Amy.”   
  
“Amy what?”

 

“McNeilson.” She whimpered, her eyes unable to meet the teachers.

 

“Alright, both of you are coming with me.” She ordered as she began to turn away.

 

“Awk, where to?” I groaned, I hadn't even had time to eat my lunch.

 

“The principals office. Clearly she didn't do a good enough job telling you last time that smoking is not allowed.”

 

I scowled and picked up my bag. This was just another day for me, but I noticed that Amy was shaking as she gathered up her things into her backpack. She really was just a good girl, maybe now she'd realise she was in too deep hanging around with me.

 

Although I'd sat outside Mrs Lattison's office a dozen times before, I wasn't exactly in my comfort zone. I was still walking a fine line with her. She'd threatened to kick me out, and I'd gotten in trouble twice since then. I had been trying hard in several classes, and my grades had improved. At this point I was praying to every god that the good outweighed the bad. If I'd come this far to get thrown out now, I didn't know what I'd do.

The corridor was deathly quiet, with only the sound of my teacher's heel tapping on the floor to my left and Amy's quiet sniffling on my right. The door was open in Mrs Lattison's office and I could just hear faint conversation between her and another person. However I only lifted my head when the door at the bottom of the corridor opened and the sound of leather shoes squeaking against the freshly polished floors filled the dead air.

 

I glanced up, only to see Mr Way walking alongside Ms Weir. He was holding a small Styrofoam box of what I presumed was his lunch and a paper cup of coffee. I diverted my eyes to the floor when he noticed me.

 

“What's happened here?” Ms Weir asked, stopping in front of us.

 

“I caught them smoking.”

 

I dared to lift my head again and saw Ms Weir shaking her head. Gerard, however, just stood there staring directly at me. There were a few moments of uninterrupted eye contact between us, before he looked at the crying girl beside me.

 

“That's terrible.” He sighed. “They're both such bright students.”

 

“Amy, I never would've thought...”

 

Amy had been staring at the floor for some time now, trying and failing to hide her crumpled expression. She had no reason to be crying, sure she might have a call home to her parents and she might get grounded for a while, but she didn't risk getting expelled.

 

I glared up at him. He was being deliberately patronising, and there was nothing I could do about it. I wanted to jump up and slap him across the face - something I hadn't felt in a long time. I was completely blinded by my feelings for him for the past few weeks, but now I was realising how much of an irritating fuck he could be. He _said_ that spending time apart would be good for us, so why was he constantly cropping up in my life?

 

He didn't look at me again, his eyes lingered on Amy for a minute while the other women finished their conversation. Only once they'd finished did he turn and continue up the corridor, alongside Ms Weir. I let out a long, irritated sigh and clenched my fists, my nails digging into my palms and leaving red marks. I was so angry now. Angry at how contradicting he was, angry at how he happened to catch me at my lowest points, and angry at the fact that he was finding his way into my head when I didn't want him there.

 

“Right.” Came Mrs Lattison's voice from her doorway. “Come in and sit down.”

 


	29. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank skives Gerards' class

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've made up a plan for the next few chapters and now I can't wait to write the next few. Sorry this one is so crap and short but I just needed to get it out there

If I was going to be completely honest, going to Mr Way's class seemed like the worst thing on the planet when the bell rang for fifth period. I could've listed a thousand things I'd rather do than enter that classroom: like getting punched in the face or having a colonoscapy.

 

Okay, I was being a little dramatic. But one thing I _was_ willing to do was hide in the bathroom for the entire period. I'd skived a few times before, but I'd never once had to hide in the bathroom stall. You see, the staff knew all my hiding places, and this was a last resort. 

 

So I got comfortable, dumping my bag on the floor and perching myself on the toilet seat. Of course, there was no Wifi signal anywhere in the school, so the only thing I had for entertainment was my music playlist and the contents of my bag - which consisted of crumpled pieces of paper, a Geography textbook, and a chocolate bar that I'd forgotten about and had now been flattened by the sheer weight of crap I kept in there. The next hour was definitely going to drag. 

 

As it so happens, not many people go to the bathroom during class. In fact, only two people came in. At first, I pulled my headphones out and held my breath, thinking it might be a member of staff out searching for me, but I bent down and peeked under the door and was relieved to see a pair of dirty converse walk past. I was a little on-edge throughout the period, so I was thankful that the rest of the school day went by uneventfully. 

 

I decided to go to Ray's after school since I hadn't in so long. It was strange knowing that it'd been weeks since we'd spent time together – just the two of us. And of course, we did what we enjoyed best – playing video games. I was so content for the first time in a while that I completely forgot why I'd been so upset for the past few days, until Ray brought it back to my attention. 

 

“So... what's up with you and Mr Way?” 

 

I immediately felt my chest ache, like my whole body just heaved as all the events of the last two weeks came rushing back to me. 

 

“We're not together.” I stated, taking my eyes off the screen for a moment. 

 

“Oh.” We were both silent for a moment. Why did he have to bring that up? Or more importantly, why did he care? “Did you dump him then?” He pressed on. I was sitting cross-legged on the floor and Ray was on the couch in front of me, so I couldn't see his face, but from what his voice sounded like, he sounded very cautious. 

 

“No, he told me he needed time apart.” I didn't feel like talking about it – I didn't want to discuss anything of that subject with Ray. The last thing I needed was to fall out with him again. 

 

“So, does that mean like forever?” He asked. 

 

“I don't fucking know.” I snapped. I was being incredibly bitter, but I had the right to be. I'd spent all my energy trying to avoid Gerard and I'd only just managed to forget about him. 

 

“Wow, dude, I'm sorry.” 

 

There was another prolonged silence. I knew Ray was probably happy now that we'd broken up. He was the one who was so adamant that it was dangerous. 

 

“Dude, I can't believe that actually happened.” He said, laughing a little. 

 

“Yeah.” 

 

“So, you guys like... fucked, right?” 

 

“Yep.” I didn't know why I was answering him. I guess I was just answering his questions until he shut up. 

 

“Jeez man... thats so... but he's so old!” He said, screwing his face up. 

 

“Uh, not really.” I hoped he would pick up on the apathy in my voice – but sadly, he didn't. 

 

“Did you guys ever do it in school?” 

 

“What!? Why?” 

 

“It's just kinda weird, y'know.” I could tell he was curious, but it still didn't give him a right to be invasive in my private life. I'm sure he wouldn't appreciate it if I was like this with him and Hannah. Although, I doubt they'd had sex yet. Ray was the epitome of a straight virgin. “That's just so weird though...” he said. He sounded like he was discussing time and dimension or something, not the dynamics of gay sex. “Hey... so... how bigs' his dick?” 

 

“You know, you ask a lot of fucking questions about my sex life for someone who claims to be straight.” 

 

“Dude, I'm sorry.” 

 

“Just shut up about him, okay.” Maybe I was being a bit dramatic, but thinking about Gerard was really getting to me. I didn't want to fall for him again. That's how it happened the first time around, it started off as some silly crush until he kept getting into my head. “I don't want to think about him any more.” I mumbled. 

 

“Sorry...” He said, sincerely this time. 

 

“I don't wanna play this anymore.” I sighed, my mood completely ruined. 

 


	30. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank skives again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow, 30 chapters already.

I knew I was pushing it, but I still didn't feel like seeing Mr Way again. Despite the well-known fact that skipping his class twice in a row would put me at higher risk of getting caught. Although, he clearly hadn't noticed the first time since I hadn't been pulled up by management about it. So instead of going to Art, I went to the little spot outside the fire exit that Mr Way and I used to go to. It was the only place I could think of that wasn't the bathroom – I wasn't going to sit in there and have to deal with people shitting in the stall next to me. And plus, I wanted to smoke. I wasn't going to light one up inside and set off the fire alarm – which may or may not have happened once before.

 

It went smoothly at first, I'd gotten halfway through my music playlist and was about to start my second cigarette. I'd regretted going outside a little since it was starting to get cold outside and I only had my hoodie to keep me warm, but I decided it wasn't worth going back inside for. I thought I was going to get away with it until I spotted a familiar mess of blonde hair through the window.

 

“Fuck.” I hissed, praying she hadn't seen me. But of course, she had, and was now proceeding to push open the fire door.

 

“What are you doing?” She asked, looking around.

 

“Having a smoke.” I replied, stating the obvious. “What are you doing?”

 

She checked behind her nervously before stepping out onto the concrete. “You're supposed to be at art.”

 

“I'm not going.” I mumbled. “I think I'm gonna drop it.”

 

“What? You can't do that!” She exclaimed. I silenced her by pressing my fingers to my lips, and she remembered where we were. “S-sorry...” She nodded, now in a calmer tone. “But... you're good at it, why would you wanna drop it?”

 

“I just...” I stopped for a moment, struggling to find the words. I couldn't tell her the whole truth, of course, and I was terrible at making stuff up. “I just don't like the teacher.”

 

“Mr Way? He's so nice though.” She smiled encouragingly. What was she talking about? He was rude and sarcastic and temperamental. Although, now that I thought about it, he had done some nice things for me. He came and picked me up in the pouring rain just because I asked and he made me coffee and wrapped me up in a blanket when I was cold.

 

“Frank?” I realised I'd been smiling.

 

“What were you saying?” I quickly composed myself, reaching up and physically wiping the smile off my face. She stared at me for a second and looked at the ground.

 

“It's nothing.” She said “I was actually just going to the office for Ms Weir... so I have to get back now.”

 

“Alright...”

 

She didn't say goodbye, just stepped back inside and shut the door gingerly behind her. I took another draw of my cigarette, which now had ash building up on the end of it, and watched her slowly fade out of view.

 

I was going to meet Ray outside at the end of the day, but unfortunately I'd got out a few minutes late. Ms Peterson decided to keep me behind and yell at me for wearing headphones when she specifically told me not to. That didn't bother me though, teachers did that all the time to me. However, the thing that did bother me was the fact that Ray was extremely impatient and would probably leave without me if I didn't hurry up.

 

So I had to hurry down the now-empty corridors, bursting through the door leading out into the car park. We usually met at the school gates, which was out of sight, so all I could do was pray under my breath that he hadn't left without me. His house was a good fifteen minutes away on foot, so I didn't want to walk it alone. I had gotten past the last car when I heard my name.

 

“Frank!”

 

That voice sounded angry. I didn't want to turn around, for fear it might be Mrs Lattison about to tear me a new asshole for not being in class. In actual fact, it was much worse.

 

“What the fuck are you playing at!?” Gerard seethed when he finally reached me.

 

“What?” I blurted, because for one terrifying moment I actually had no idea what he was talking about.

 

“Skipping my classes - that's what!” He cried, throwing his arms out exaggeratedly. He was always so dramatic and theatrical about everything.

 

“Oh yeah.” A smile played on my lips. _Now_ I'd got his attention. So much for trying to spend time apart.

 

“I'm telling you now, Frank. You better be in every single class of mine from now on. You're lucky I didn't rat you out already.” Wait. He hadn't ratted me out, which meant he'd deliberately gone against school rules not to get me in trouble. 

 

“Or what?” I asked, folding my arms over my chest. 

 

“Or I'll tell Mrs Lattison and you'll get thrown out.” 

 

He couldn't be serious, could he? Would he really have me kicked out of school? I stared him down for a minute, and he stared right back. He had to be bluffing, how could he do so much for me and say so many sentimental things and not feel any remorse for something like that? It was my fault for not going in the first place, I realise that now, but did he have to be so harsh? 

 

I noticed his eye twitch, I almost missed it, but it was enough to prove to me that he was bluffing. I broke out into a smirk and narrowed my eyes. “Why do you give a shit?” 

 

He took a step back and let out an exasperated sigh. “It's not like that-” he explained, but he couldn't meet my eyes. “I actually give a shit whether you do well in my class or not, I'm like that with all my students.” 

 

“Sure.” I whispered under my breath, because I got some kind of gain from seeing him flip out and try to overcompensate with anger. 

 

“What?” He furrowed his brows at me. “Wha- I- This is nothing to do with _'us'_ , okay?” He was stumbling over his words now, which was proof enough for me that it was, in fact, about us. 

 

“Why did you break up with me if you're just gonna keep talking to me like this?” I asked, staring him in the face. For the first time, it was him finding it difficult to maintain eye contact. I still had that nervous sensation in the pit of my stomach, but I put that to one side and tried to focus on getting answers. 

 

He looked around suspiciously before leaning closer and lowering his voice. “Our lives outside of school cannot interfere with the fact that I'm your  _teacher_ .” He emphasised. “I felt like it was interfering with my professional life.” 

 

For some strange reason, I felt even worse after hearing that. Sure, It wasn't because he didn't like me anymore, or that he was tired of me, but because I was disturbing the rest of his life. The last thing I'd wanted to be was annoying. 

 

“But anyway,” He continued “That doesn't matter. If you don't show up to class, I'm gonna have no choice but to send you to Mrs Lattison.” 

 

I didn't answer, not that he needed one, I just turned to leave. I was about to start speed-walking to the gate like I had been before, but to my surprise, Ray was already standing there. 

 

“Uh...” He looked between Mr Way and I, eyes wide and brows knitted together. How much had he heard? “Hey... Mr Way.” He mumbled. Mr Way knew that Ray knew, but Ray didn't know that Mr Way knew that he knew. 

 

“Hi.” Mr Way nodded, looking just as alarmed and confused as Ray.

 

“Come on.” I sighed, grabbing Ray's arm and pulling him away. I dragged him all the way to the school gates, where he finally tugged away and started blabbing again. He must've thought he'd walked into some heated argument or romantic confession. “What were you, uh...” He began. 

 

“He was telling me not to skive again.” I continued down the path, leaving him struggling to keep up.

 

“Please tell me you're not dating him again.” He sighed, rolling his eyes. Jeez, he spoke as if it was him that had to be on this emotional rollercoaster. 

 

“I'm not. It was just about my attendance. I swear.” I didn't feel the need to prove myself in any way to Ray, I just needed him to stop treading on my heels with this whole Mr Way thing. I wasn't exactly over him, but I was trying, and it didn't help when my friend constantly felt the need to check up on my relationship status.

 


	31. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard speaks to Frank and opens up about the past few weeks

It was a bit stupid to think I'd get away with skipping Mr Way's class again, even if I _did_ think he was bluffing. Sure - he might not tell Mrs Lattison, but he was going to do something. Whatever he decided to do couldn't have worried me too much since I'd pretty much forgot about it halfway through the day. Which made it all the more surprising when my name came up in my teachers' conversation during seventh period.

 

“Frank Iero? Yes I do have him with me... When?... ah right, of course.”

 

The class was fairly quiet and I could _just_ hear a faint voice on the other side of the telephone line from my seat at the front of the class. A few heads turned my way and I shifted in my seat uncomfortably. It wasn't rare at all for me to receive a phone call in school, but I'd already guessed that it'd be about me not turning up to Art. The phone clicked and my teacher turned to look at me.

 

“Mr Way has asked if you could see him in his class at the end of the day.”

 

She then nodded and smiled before addressing the class once again. I sunk lower into my seat, feeling my stomach knotting up with nausea and anxiety. Hopefully he only yelled at me, I didn't want to be in there long.

 

I was the last one out of the class when the final bell eventually did ring. Unfortunately though it didn't take long to walk to art, and my heart was racing when I stopped in front of the door that I hadn't been through in a week. I took a deep breath and tried to stop my hands from shaking, then knocked. I was met by Mr Way's muffled reply from inside, telling me to come in and shut the door. I followed suit, stepping inside quickly and meeting his eyes from across the room. He didn't look too angry at first, but that soon changed.

 

“Get over here.” He said, getting up from his seat behind the desk. I walked over reluctantly, every footstep resonating in my mind. I could barely look up from the floor, but when I eventually did raise my head enough to meet eyes with him, he grabbed my wrist. It didn't hurt, but it took me by surprise. So much so that I let out a tiny whimper that he _definitely_ heard. He didn't leave any time for me to be embarrassed by it though as he had already grabbed my shoulder with his other arm and pulled me closer. I held my breath and stared up at him. Some of his hair had fallen in his face but he glared down at me nonetheless. 

 

“What did I tell you?” He asked. I wasn't going to reply. Even if I had the guts, I physically couldn't. My throat had closed up and my chest was constricting around my lungs until it became hard to breathe. “Are you just doing this deliberately to annoy me?” He raised his voice, making me flinch. 

 

When I didn't answer, he pushed me up against the chalkboard, making me whine even more pathetically. I put my hands on his shoulders, ready to push him away, when he bent down as if he was about to kiss my neck like he'd done so many times before. Although I didn't feel his lips, just his breath against my skin. 

 

“I tried to leave you alone. I tried.” He growled in my ear. “But I can't help but think about you.” My mouth suddenly felt very dry, which didn't help at all when I attempted to speak. 

 

“I tried to do the mature, adult thing. This _is_ illegal after all.” I felt his hand move from my wrist to my lower back, I never realised how his hand seemed to fit the curve of my spine so well until now. “But I just can't.” His voice raised an octave and he started to sound more desperate. “Do you feel like that too?” I wanted to push him away. I thought I had just started to get over him. I'd reminded myself time and time again that this relationship could never work in the long run, but there was still a tiny part of me that just _begged_ for his body against mine. I longed for affection – and his, specifically. However I didn't want my heart to rule my head. 

 

“Frank, please.” He whispered, pulling back to look me in the eye. 

 

“We can't.” I croaked, turning my head so he couldn't see my face, although that only gave him the perfect excuse to press kisses all the way across my neck. “M-Mr Way- the door-” I stuttered, my knee's buckling underneath me. He hadn't touched me in so long, and now his hands were running up my back and his mouth was moving along the sensitive spot below my jaw. I was completely swept away by it all, until I felt his one hand leave my back only to move to my belt. “Mr Way- no!” I protested, pushing him away with both hands. He stepped back with ease and sighed, his chest rising and falling dramatically. 

 

“Don't you want this?” He asked, looking defeated. I averted my eyes to my own feet. “I thought that's why you'd been acting up this whole time.” The room fell quiet as he waited for a reply. I bit my lip and squeezed my eyes shut, as if preparing for what I was going to say next. 

 

“Of course I do.” I mumbled, my voice as shaky as my hands. “I... just...” I couldn't see his face, but I knew he was staring intently, hanging on every word that left my mouth, like I had been the first few times we'd been together. 

 

“This won't work.” I stated. 

 

“Frank, is this because I ignored you?” He took a step forward and his hands reached for mine, but I yanked them out of his reach. 

 

“Frank, I'm sorry – I wont do it again, just stay for a while and we can talk.” I hated the way my name sounded rolling off his tongue, It made my heart swell. “Please don't go.” 

 

I had to go. If I stayed here any longer I'd convince myself that it was okay to fall for him again, although when I thought about it I don't think I ever stopped. I headed for the door, but he was there behind me, reaching for my wrist again and saying anything to get my attention. 

 

“Please just let me explain, Frankie – I know I'm a cold-hearted asshole and I know I'm not the best boyfriend or anything, but – god please just stay.” 

 

I wanted to stay, knowing that if I did, He'd make up for all the time he'd ignored me over the past few weeks. And he'd probably apologise profusely and reassure me that he'd try his best not to let it happen again – and maybe he'd wrap me up in his arms again and everything would seem okay for a little while. But it wouldn't last, something would go wrong. It had to. 

 

I tugged my hand out of his grip and continued to the door, throwing it wide open and hurrying out and along the corridor. I hadn't cried, but I still felt completely torn. I had never  _really_ stopped loving him – if you could call it love – I'd just tried to put it off, convince myself that what I felt wasn't real, just hormones. Now I knew my feelings were real, but I still couldn't act on them because there would definitely be repercussions. 

 

As I began my long walk home, I told myself that I would try and get over him. That I would distract myself with other things, like my friends and my school work. I had never really been that headstrong when it came to decision making, but I knew that if I wanted to stay safe, I had to be with someone my own age. Even if it did break his heart, and mine. 

 


	32. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank gets drunk in a bid to forget about Mr Way, but ends up making a few mistakes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit this is 3,390 words.
> 
> That's like longer than all the essays I do for school lmao. 
> 
> Hopefully this will quench the gaping hole in your hearts'

I sent Ray a text letting him know that I was coming to his house – I didn't care if he was busy, I needed to keep my mind off of Mr Way. Although, when I arrived it seemed he wasn't busy at all as Hannah and Amy were already there.

 

“Hey, man. I was just about to call you.” He grinned as he stepped aside to let me in.

 

“Yeah.” I said, stepping inside and dropping my bag on the floor.

 

He followed behind me as I went into the living room where the girls were. They said their hello's and asked me how I was, to which I shrugged and grunted. Ray say himself down beside Hannah, leaving my seating options limited to either the spot beside Amy or the floor. I decided the carpet didn't seem so bad and perched myself down in front of the couch, leaning against it for support. I hope she didn't feel too offended that I'd chosen to sit here as opposed to a perfectly good seat on the couch.

 

“Where were you?” Hannah asked, her brows furrowing in concern. “We waited for you after school but you never came out.” I bit my lip and scrambled for an answer. Hannah and Amy didn't know about Mr Way and I, but Ray did. If I said I'd been in his class he'd probably bother me about it for god knows' how long – thinking we'd gotten together again.

"My Spanish teacher kept me behind for a while." Was what I eventually came up with. 

I sat staring into space for a while as the three of them droned on, until I was pulled out by the sound of Ray's front door slamming.

 

“Is that your brother?” I asked, looking at Ray for a reply.

 

“Yeah, he just left.” He replied, half distracted by Hannah's hand running through his hair.

 

“Does he have any alcohol?” I asked.

 

Ray's eyes seemed to light up as he processed my sentence and he broke out into a mischievous grin before jumping up from his seat. Usually, if Ray and I were lucky, he'd have a case of beer or two left over from the parties he'd been to. But today – of all day's – Ray and I found two bottles of Vodka and half a bottle of Jack Daniels under his bed.

 

“Jeez, d'you think we'll be able to drink all this?” Ray mumbled, unscrewing the cap on the whiskey. “How long has this been in here?”

 

“We'll be fine.” I said, grabbing the bottles from him and heading downstairs. “We'll mix it with something.”

 

Ray must've been nervous at first – he was always worried that his brother would get mad, despite the fact he was usually to stoned or drunk to realise his stuff was even missing. That fear soon subsided after he'd had a few drinks.

 

The girl's were both pretty hesitant at first, Amy only taking a little more than a capful of the stuff with her coke, although she still complained about the taste. Hannah had a little more, although she kept reminding Ray that she was 'only having a few'. I, on the other hand, was going to take all I could get and had already finished the whiskey and moved on to the vodka and coke.

 

After I noticed I wasn't getting drunk fast enough, I started drinking more. Which was a big mistake on my part as it all hit me at once later in the night. Soon enough, when Ray and Hannah had decided to start a round of street fighter, I was falling all over the place.

 

“Dude, just sit down!” Ray said when I'd almost tripped trying to cross the room for more Vodka. He pushed me down onto the couch next to Amy and jokingly ordered her to 'look after me.' It was true, I was the drunkest one there. And Ray had decided to put me in the care of Amy – who probably hadn't had a drop of alcohol until now.

 

“Are you going to be sick?” She asked, putting a hand on my shoulder.

 

“No.” I threw her a puzzled look. “Why?”

 

“Just checking.” She bit her lip and her eyes scanned over me.

 

I wasn't sure whether my state could still be considered within the 'tipsy' stage of drunkenness. I was coherent at times, but I barely noticed Amy's shoulder pressed up against mine and I couldn't focus on the images on the TV screen for more than a few seconds. I didn't stop there though, I kept getting up for another, and another, until soon enough there was only a little left and I started to drink straight from the bottle.

 

“Frank you need to stop, dude.” Hannah laughed and reached for the bottle.

 

“No.” I groaned, tightening my grip and pulling it closer to my body.

 

“You're already drunk, you don't need any more.”

 

“Yeah I do.”

 

I could tell they were getting annoyed with me, but at this point I was too drunk to care. I got selfish and moody and stubborn when I drank.

 

“Look why don't you go get some water?” Amy suggested.

 

“Yeah that's probably a good idea.” Hannah concurred.

 

I didn't have any time to protest because Amy was tugging me off the couch and into the hall, towards the kitchen. I suppose having water would be a good idea if I didn't want to wake up with a thumping headache the following morning. So I allowed myself to be dragged along by my wrist.

 

“Don't fall.” Amy ordered, propping me up against the wall so I didn't topple over like a lead weight. She then turned and grabbed a glass from the draining board and started pouring me some water. I had to wonder why she was being so nice to me. Of course, in that state of mind I jumped to the conclusion that she must like me. No girl had ever been that nice to me, I mean, she was pouring me some water so clearly she wanted 'the D'.

 

I pulled my phone out for the first time since I'd got to Ray's and, to my surprise, saw I'd had five unread texts and three missed calls from none other than Gerard. My stomach turned and I felt as if I sobered up a little as soon as my brain processed his name on my screen. I didn't want to look at any of the texts, but my clumsy drunk fingers managed to unlock my phone and pull up the messaging app.

 

_'Frank, I'm going to call you, and I'm going to explain.'_

 

I didn't want to see, but my eyes couldn't help but move across the screen.

_'Answer the phone. Now. Please x'_

 

_'If you don't answer the phone, I'll explain over text, But I'd prefer to talk in person. Are you okay? I hope you're not angry x'_

 

The next text was a long paragraph. Luckily for me, however, I dropped my phone. I went to bend down and pick it up but swayed and fell over, bringing one of Ray's dining room chairs with me. I laid there in a crumpled mess for a few seconds, confused as to how I got there, when Amy lifted the chair off me.

 

“How did you manage that?” She asked, shaking me by my shoulder and trying to get me to stand up. “Frank, your phone!” She picked it up and noted the pretty hefty crack on the screen.

 

“Fuck.” I groaned, looking up and realising what I'd done. I sat up on my knee's and grabbed it, running my hand over the screen.

 

“Are you okay?” She asked, putting a hand on my shoulder.

 

I glanced at her arm, then at her. The light in the kitchen made her hair light up around her face like a halo and her eyes were trained on mine. I'm not sure why I let the following sequence of events happen, maybe cause I wasn't fully coherent, or maybe because I was so desperate to fill my mind with anything but Mr Way. Honestly, I'm sure it was a mixture of the two, because I didn't stop Amy from leaning closer, and didn't say no when she asked if she could kiss me. I didn't fully comprehend what was actually happening until her lips were _there_.

 

It was such a weird sensation. I was so used to _him_ , that this seemed like a foreign experience. Like I was just re-learning what kissing was. First of all, her lips were much softer than his – and not necessarily in a good way. They were squishy and covered in lipgloss which got all over me – although that might also be because I was so sloppy. Another thing was how soft her face was. Sure, Mr Way's stubble bothered me sometimes, but it just wasn't the same without that friction there. I tried to deepen the kiss, tilting my head and opening my mouth slightly, but I heard her whine in protest and push me away. “Frank, do you like me?” She whispered. I groaned in reply and bent down to press our lips together again, hoping it would be better the second time around. But no matter how much I turned my head or moved my lips it didn't get any better. Or should I say, it didn't get any closer to how _he'd_ kissed me.

 

She pushed me away again, looking into my eyes. “Frank, I'm being serious.” She pouted, her lipgloss smudged around her mouth. “I... I'm not the kind of girl who just kisses guys for no reason. I wanna know if you'll be my boyfriend.” She blushed and bowed her head, letting her eyes drop to the floor.

 

I opened my mouth to answer, but I couldn't get the words out as I felt bile rising in my throat. I tried to move out the way but I couldn't get very far – I was only on my hands and knee's after all. After a few seconds of shuffling around attempting to get to the bin, I accepted my fate and vomited all over the floor - much to the disgust of Amy, who started screaming.

 

I was still dry-heaving when Ray was attempting to clean up the mess, only now I was leaning against the wall in the garden, with Hannah and Amy whispering to each other a few meters away. I had tears brimming my eyes and my throat burned from the stomach acid. I put my hands out, blindly reaching for the wall so I could stand up straight.

 

“Jeez, Frank. Know your limits.” Ray sighed as he stepped outside. I wiped my eyes and ran my hand through my hair, pushing my fringe out the way. I really had sunk to a new low.

 

“I can drive you home in my mom's car, if you want?” Ray suggested, putting a hand on my shoulder.

 

“No.” I said, brushing it away.

 

“No?” He questioned, but I was already making my way to the door and stepping into the house. I'd sobered up a little, but my senses were still dulled and my motor skills still weren't at optimum condition. I heard him following behind me, when he grabbed me by my shoulder and shoved a glass of water into my hands.

 

“I don't need it.” I groaned, shoving him away and making him spill it all over himself. “I'm going by myself!”

 

“At least let me walk you!” He was angry about the fact that he now had water all down the front of his shirt, but was still concerned for my wellbeing.

 

“I can go alone.” I said, turning and heading out the front door.

 

I _had_ intended to walk home, but once I stepped outside into the dimly-lit street I had second thoughts. It was freezing, and even with my hoodie on the cold still nipped at my cheeks and fingers and made me shiver. The end of the street was dark and my house was a long way away. 

 

I pulled out my phone - momentarily forgetting about the crack in my screen - and looked through my contacts. The events of the night started to run through my head as I searched for one name in particular. Amy – god, why had I kissed her? Why did I let her think that I liked her? And most of all, why did I convince myself that she liked me? I selected his number and put the phone to my ear as the phone rang out. I counted each tone, growing more and more nervous with each one. It took him five rings to pick up, and when he did he seemed out of breath.

 

“Frank?”

 

I bit my lip as I felt my throat swell and my eyes sting. I didn't know what to say, I had so much to tell him and no words to express it.

 

“Frank, you there?”

 

I tried not to let out a sob, but I couldn't help it. I covered my mouth with my hand in an attempt to mask the fact that I was crying. “I-I'm sorry.”

 

“What?” He asked in a mixture of bewilderment and relief. “Sorry for what?”

 

I didn't want to go on in fear of what he might do or say, and my heavy breathing was making it hard for me to say anything. “I-I kissed s-someone else.” I stuttered, just managing to get the words out before letting out another strangled sob.

 

“Oh, Frank.” He sighed. “You didn't, did you?” He sounded so heart broken.

 

“I'm sorry- I didn't know what I was-” I couldn't get the rest of my sentence out as my breathing had become so heavy and irregular.

 

“Alright, just take some deep breaths, just calm down.” He consoled, talking in that low, concerned tone I'd heard that day I'd gone to his house. “Where are you? Are you safe?”

 

“I-I'm outside Ray's” I stuttered, trying to regulate my breathing again. “Can you come and pick me up?”

 

It was late, and I didn't actually expect him to get up and come out to get me at this time. But It was Mr Way. He cared about me, whether I knew it or not. I sat on the kerb and stared down at my own two feet, just running through it all in my head, Thankfully it didn't seem that long before his car pulled up. I had to squint as his headlights got closer and closer. Even once the car had came to a halt, I couldn't find the strength to pick myself up off the concrete.

 

“Frank, what are you doing?” He asked as he got out and slammed his car door behind him. I heard his footsteps up behind me and felt his arms round my body, pulling me to my feet. “Jesus, have you been drinking?” He spun me round and examined my face. I'm sure I looked a mess, I still had the taste of sick in my mouth and I was finding it hard just to keep my eyelids open.

 

“Can we go to yours?” I asked, leaning into the warmth of his body. I felt his arms wrap around me again, probably because I'd fall over without the support.

 

“Wont your parents be worried?” He asked.

 

“My Mom thinks I'm at Ray's.” I mumbled into his chest.

 

I allowed him to lead me to his car and made no effort to help him get me into the passenger seat. To any passers-by, it might have just looked like a family member getting a drunken delinquent home. But it was nearly eleven at night by now, so there wouldn't be anyone around to witness it.

 

I fell asleep on the drive home, and only woke up when I felt Gerard struggling to pull me out of the car. I got out successfully and made it to the front door, where he helped me inside. I remember him leaving me to stand in the hall for what seemed like ages while he went to get me a glass of water, but I can't remember how I got upstairs and into his bedroom.

 

“Eugh, you've got sick on you.” He pointed out before lifting my shirt over my head, he probably knew that I'd strangle myself on my clothes or end up with a concussion if I attempted to undress myself. “How much did you even have?”

 

“Just some Vodka... whiskey...” I groaned, laying back on the bed and not putting up any sort of fight as he pulled my jeans off. It wasn't anything sexual; he was just taking care of me. He folded my clothes up neatly and told me he'd just be a second, and walked out of the room. It hit me now that this was the first time I'd seen Mr Way's actual bedroom. I craned my neck from where I was laying on the bed and looked around. He had crisp, white bed sheets that reminded me of luxury hotels, although the rest of the room seemed pretty basic. The furniture was all made out of the same dark, hardwood and the curtains and pillows were a rich purple colour. To the left of the bed, furthest from the door, was a dresser with a few aftershave bottles and necessities strewn about on top of it. The walls were all white too, and he didn't have any posters or pictures. It was all so mature, such a contrast from my own room.

 

When he returned he urged me to drink my glass of water he'd placed on the bedside table and proceeded to pull out clothes from his drawers.

 

“Mh, I can just sleep in my boxers.” I whined.

 

“At least put a shirt on, it gets really cold in here at night.”

 

I groaned and took the shirt from his hands, not paying any attention to the design. When I put it on and stood up I caught myself in the mirror and finally noticed the faded Iron Maiden artwork on the front. I smiled lazily to myself and picked up the glass of water. I never realised how parched I actually was until now. I gulped down half of it and almost choked when I turned round and saw Mr Way standing naked, back turned, pulling on a pair of pyjama bottoms.

 

“Uh- where will I sleep?” I stuttered, trying to look at anything but him.

 

“With me. If you're okay with that?” He turned around, his naked chest exposed. I nodded shyly and glanced down at the bed. I was actually going to be sleeping beside him. How was I ever going to get to sleep when he was right _there._

 

“Are you... angry?” I asked, my finger tracing the rim of the glass nervously.

 

He took a deep breath and ran his hand through his hair. “No... I'm just upset.” My heart fell and a new wave of nerves washed over me. “Let's just talk about this tomorrow.” He said, getting into the farthest side of the bed and laying down with his back turned.

 

“But I want to talk now.” I put the water down on the cabinet and climbed in the other side.

 

“You should sober up first.”

 

“I _am_ sober. Just let me apologise, I didn't know what I was doing.” I reached out and put my hand on his shoulder. “I never wanted to upset you... It was a mistake.” I searched him for any signs of an answer, but he just stared at the wall. “Mr Way...”

 

“Gerard.”

 

I smiled a little and laid my head on his shoulder. “Gerard... I only love you, okay?” I softened my voice until it was barely a whisper, but the room was silent, so he had no way of missing it. He turned onto his back and looked up at me. I could see his eyes scanning my features for a moment and couldn't help but blush.

 

“You mean that?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Then he took me into his arms and all my nerves melted away. I laid my head on his chest and I could hear his heart beating. I let my eyes slide shut and my exhaustion finally hit me. It had been a long day and all my energy had been drained, so I fell into a deep sleep almost instantly.

 


	33. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, short chapter and I have been away for a few days. Although I am starting the next one immediately and it should be up tonight. I just love ending on cliffhangers.

The following morning I woke up to an empty bed and a throbbing headache. I didn't realise where I was for a moment, but when I sat up and looked around a few flashes of the night before came back to me. I was a little disappointed to find Gerard gone, but the scent of his shampoo and cologne still clung to the bedsheets, so he couldn't of been away too long. I got up and found my jeans draped over a chair by his desk, along with my still puke-covered shirt. I was sure Gerard wouldn't mind if I borrowed his for a little while longer. Although, I still had his other shirt he'd let me borrow last time (which I hadn't yet washed since it smelled like him and may or may not wear sometimes.)

 

I was relieved to discover that Gerard was only downstairs, since I could hear the radio and the sizzling of something being cooked on the stove. I walked downstairs tentatively, trying not to move my head for fear it would hurt even more. When I rounded the stairs and went into the kitchen he was standing with his back turned at the stove, already dressed and freshly-showered. I wondered how long he'd been awake.

 

“Hi.” I uttered. My voice was croaky and rough, partly from sleep but also because of my mild hangover.

 

“You're finally up.” He said in a monotone, turning round and examining me. As he did so, I noticed what he was cooking.

 

“Oh, omelette.” I smiled, nodding to the frying pan. “I love omelettes.”

 

If I was honest, the thought of eating made me feel a little bit sick – but I felt obligated to seeing as _he'd_ made it. I stood for a moment before walking up behind him, running my hand down his spine affectionately. He just continued shaking the pan and flipping the omelette with a spatula. It was pretty obvious he was still upset about last night. 

 

“So... can we talk now?” I asked.

 

“What about?” He didn't turn round.

 

“I want to apologise about what I did.” I mumbled. “I know it's not an excuse, but I was drunk and annoyed and hurt...” I trailed off, feeling a little stupid for having to explain myself. I slid my arms round his waist and laid my head against his back, letting my eyes slide shut.

 

“But you knew I wanted to be with you.” He said, turning the heat down on the stove and continuing what he was doing, despite me having my arms round him. 

 

“I know, I know.” It was true, he had confessed to me earlier that day that he was sorry and wanted to continue the relationship. Now I was the one having to apologise. “I just kept telling myself to get over you, and I thought that would help...” I took another pause, trying to put my thoughts into words that made sense. “It just made me realise how much I missed you.” 

 

My words must have struck a tone with him as I felt his chest rise and fall as he sighed. He was silent for a long time, and at first I thought he wouldn't reply. 

 

“I can't stay angry at you.” He said eventually, his words as soft and sweet as they were the day before. I took my arms away and he finally turned round to face me. “I know it was a mistake.” 

 

“It was.” I said, meeting his gaze. “And I'll never do it again. I promise.” 

 

He broke out into a smile and put his arms round my waist. I was so relieved, I guess he understood that I was being sincere since he'd had to do the same thing. I draped my arms round his shoulders and laid my head on his chest. I could smell his body wash, so he must've just gotten out of the shower. It was the typical men's shower gel scent – but there was something so inherently attractive about that smell to me, especially when it was on a man. 

 

My right hand moved from his neck and found itself moving ever so slowly down his chest. I got up on my tiptoes and craned my neck so I could trace along his jaw with my lips. His skin was rough in all the right ways and I felt my stomach leap with excitement when he laughed quietly in my ear. I took that as a welcoming gesture and moved my lips further down, grazing them against the skin on his neck. 

 

“Fraaank,” he groaned “I need to finish this omelette.” He protested before I pinned him up against the counter. I returned my hands to his shoulders, tugging at the ends of his hair gently as I kissed along his neck. Despite his protests, he still trailed his hands down my back. I felt one hand ride up under my shirt teasingly before he let them linger on the curve of my ass. 

 

I started pulling at the fabric of his t-shirt, knowing for a fact that my neediness always worked. “Come on, Frank.” He moaned, pushing my hands away. “I was gonna make breakfast for you.” 

 

“In a minute.” I pulled my hands free from his and placed one on the front of his pants. 

 

“Frank-” He began. He wasn't hard yet, but I knew I could change that. 

 

I started rubbing in a circular motion while I bit and sucked at his neck. He gasped a little at the friction and I felt his hips move forward, pressing further into my palm. He had one hand on my waist, and the other with a firm grip on the counter-top. He was taking a while to get turned on, and the sizzling in the pan started to get louder and louder. I couldn't give a shit if the omelette was burning, and I'm sure he didn't either. 

 

“Mh what's taking so long.” I mumbled in his ear before pulling away and looking up at him. I was sounding unintentionally sultry due to my dry throat. 

 

“You're just impatient.” He smirked down at me. I blushed a little and removed my hand from his tangled hair. He could barely get the words 'what are you doing?' out of his mouth before I had unbuttoned his jeans. It was the first time I'd ever undone someone else's pants before, but I liked it, and from the mixture of surprise and arousal on his face, he did too. Even if my hands had fumbled around with his zipper. 

 

I pulled his jeans down so they were just hanging off his hips, revealing his bright red boxers. I hadn't pegged him as the type to wear such bold underwear, although I had only ever  _actually seen_ his underwear once or twice before we had sex. 

 

I bit my lip and stared down at the bulge in his boxers. Alright, I had his pants off, what was I going to do now? I hadn't actually gone through this properly in my head, but there was no going back now. I glanced up and met his gaze. He was staring at me in anticipation, just waiting on what I was going to do next.

 

Before we could go any further, the sound of a door-handle rattling came from the front door, followed by the distant jingling of keys. Panic filled Gerard's eyes as well as mine and he pulled his jeans up in a hurry. I didn't have time to begin to wonder who it was before Gerard dragged me across the hall and shoved me in the bathroom. He didn't say anything, just pulled the door shut behind me. Just in time, it seemed, as I heard the front door slam.

 

“ _Geraaard.”_ A voice called through the house. I pressed my ear to the door and listened intently, praying that he'd managed to fasten his jeans up in time. The radio switched off abruptly, so I could clearly hear the sound of boots against the laminate floor. The voice was muffled and quite high in pitch, so I couldn't tell if it was a man's or a woman's. Whoever it was, they'd had a key to the house, so they must know Gerard pretty damn well. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who do you think this person could be???


	34. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard tells Frank the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo! 4000+ hits

I listened intently as the footsteps drew closer. I held my breath for a moment as I thought they were coming my way. The bathroom was at the end of the hall, the kitchen door just ahead of it, so when they stopped, I assumed the person must have been standing in the kitchen doorway.

 

“What are you doing here so early?” I heard Gerard ask, I could tell he was still a little shaken having almost been caught with his pants down in front of one of his students.

 

“I'm just checking in. I was in the store and I thought I'd pick up some stuff for you.” It was a man's voice - a little high-pitched, but definitely male.

 

“Ugh, you don't have to do that.” Gerard groaned.

 

“I wanted to.”

 

There was a rustle of a bag and shuffling around as either he or Gerard moved around the room. I was shaking a little, terrified of being caught. Who the hell was it? My chest seized up at the thought of Gerard having someone else he wasn't telling me about. A secret boyfriend? A husband? I felt as if I was going to collapse. I had to really focus to pick up some parts of the conversation, but I could understand almost everything thanks to how thin the door was.

 

“Don't you have work?” Gerard asked.

 

“Not today.” Whoever it was clearly had no clue to what they'd nearly walked into.

 

I heard them moving further into the room and their conversation became muffled. My eyes searched around frantically until I spotted a glass with a toothbrush in it sitting on the cabinet. I tipped the toothbrush out and pressed the glass against the wall. I'd never tried this before, but I always saw people do it in movies. Surprisingly enough, I could hear them talking pretty clearly when I pressed my ear to the glass.

 

“So you've been doing alright?”

 

“Yes. God... you don't have to check up on me every five minutes.” Gerard started to sound pretty aggravated.

 

“You don't sound alright, what's with that tone?”

 

“Nothing. I'm just tired, that's all,” He sighed, softening his voice. “And I burnt my damn breakfast.” I heard the scraping sound of metal against metal and the clinking of dishes. It was very hard to tell what they were doing exactly.

 

“Let me put those away.” Came the voice. Gerard began to protest again but the other man shushed him. “You're always keeping yourself busy, just relax for a while, man.”

 

 _'Man.'_ I breathed a sigh of relief. This was clearly a casual relationship. I'd never heard of boyfriend's calling each other 'man' before.

 

“So how's work been anyway? Exam time's over, isn't it?” They continued.

 

“The worst part's over, so yeah, it's not bad.”

 

There was a brief silence and all I could hear was the closing and opening of cupboards and dishes clinking. The other man must've been doing the dishes. It was an odd thing for anyone to do, especially a friend. I didn't have my own house, but surely your guests wouldn't clean up for you?

 

“And what about your love life?” I froze, my hands tightening round the glass and my eyes flying open.

 

“Ugh – Mikey, Jesus.” Gerard replied almost instantly, groaning in embarrassment and disgust.

 

“What!? I'm just _asking!” 'Mikey'_ laughed a little. “I'm just wondering, y'know. It's about time you got back out there. Maybe that'll give you something to focus on.”

 

“I haveenough to focus on.”

 

What did he mean 'get back out there'? There were so many questions coming up in this conversation that I'd need to ask Gerard later. But the main question on my mind at that moment was how long I was going to have to spend in this bathroom. I prayed to god that he'd leave soon.

 

“I'm just worried about you, y'know. I care, man, you know that.”

 

Their voices lowered even more to the point where they were just faint murmurs, so I missed the last part of their conversation. Eventually, after much silence, the other man I now knew as 'Mikey' announced that he had to leave, to my relief. “I gotta take a leak quickly though.” By the time I'd comprehended his sentence he'd already made his way into the hall. My heart skipped a beat and I almost dropped my glass when I realised the door wasn't locked. It was too late now, I couldn't lock it without him hearing. And even if I could, he'd still know there was someone in there.

 

“Mikey! - Wait!” Gerard called after him. “You can't.”

 

“Why?”

 

“My toilet's broken.” You could practically feel the anxiety in his voice, I was surprised Mikey hadn't caught on yet. “Something t'do with the water pressure or something. I called a plumber out, but you know what they're like.”

 

“Ah, right... I guess I'll just have to hold it.” I heard his footsteps fade away down the hall. I had to admit, that was a good save.

 

I finally breathed easily when I heard the front door slam shut, letting myself slide down the door onto the tiles. That had to be one of the most stressful thirty seconds of my life. It really put into perspective the risk we were taking here. My pulse still hadn't returned to normal when Gerard tried opening the door, struggling at first under my dead weight. I found the strength to pull myself off the ground and opened it, staring at him.

 

“Who was that?”

 

He knew the question was coming, but still he sighed and rolled his eyes. “It's not what you think, it's my brother, Mikey.” At least it wasn't some secret boyfriend. I walked past him and went into the kitchen, finding still-wet dishes stacked neatly on the draining board and two bags full of groceries on the counter-top.

 

“Before you start-” He didn't have time to finish his sentence as I went over and started pulling the groceries out of the bags. I didn't know what the hell I was looking for – it was just normal groceries: Coffee, sugar, milk, bread. What was suspicious about that?

 

“Why was he buying you all this stuff?” I asked, throwing him a puzzled look. He just sighed and leaned against the counter, one hand on the back of his neck awkwardly. That was a definite sign of dishonesty. “And what was all that about him checking up on you?” I pressed on, staring into him. He couldn't reply, or even look at me – he just stared at the floor. “What the hell's going on!?” I raised my voice out of frustration.

 

“Look, just come sit down, I'll tell you.”

 

 

 

 

He'd ordered me to sit at the dining table while he went to go fetch something, so I sat there in nervous anticipation. I hadn't meant to be so demanding, but I felt as if there was some big secret he'd been hiding from me all this time. I really didn't know that much about him when I thought about it. He was always so quiet and thoughtful, it never occurred to me that he might have been through something that made him that way.

 

When he returned, there was a thick silence that hung in the air like a fog. He kept his gaze to the floor as he entered and slumped down into the chair next to me. He seemed to have this defeated body language about him, shoulders slumped and hands down in his lap, unable to make eye contact. After a few moments he pulled something out of his pocket and placed it down on the table in front of me. A gold coin.

 

“What's this?” I asked

 

“Look at it.”

 

I bit my lip and picked it up, holding it between my thumb and index finger and examining the inscription. The word _'recovery'_ was inscribed along the top, with the words _'to thine own self, be true'_ at either side and _'one year'_ in the very centre. It still wasn't making sense to me, so Gerard began to explain.

 

“I've been sober for one year and two months.” He said, finally locking eyes with me.

 

“Oh...” I had no clue what to say. I'd been rendered speechless. I had no experience with that kind of thing, I hadn't even thought for a second that Gerard had been addicted to anything.

 

“I was an alcoholic for a long time.” He went on, staring off into nothing. “Then I went onto harder stuff. I ruined a long-term relationship because of it.”

 

I'd never thought about Gerard's past relationships before; he'd probably had all sorts of mature, adult relationships – things I could probably never give him.

 

“We were together for five years. We got engaged, actually. But I just...” He made a dismissive gesture with his hand, unable to finish his sentence. That explained why he lived in this big house by himself. It must've reminded him of that relationship every day. I suddenly felt so heartbroken for him, but so inferior compared to his past relationship.

 

“I went into therapy, got diagnosed with depression.” His eyes were vacant, almost as if his mind had left his body and was in another place – re-living the last few years. I couldn't begin to imagine all that he'd went through. He didn't show it at all. “But I got better, started focusing more on work and art. Eventually, I got over it.” He finally blinked and trained his eyes back onto me. I'd been staring at him this whole time, just listening. It seemed like the first time he'd been really open to me – I mean _really_ open. “I'm just starting to get out of that depression, but Mikey still worries about me... He used to buy me groceries when I was too hungover or depressed to get out of bed. I guess it's a habit.”

 

I didn't have anything to say. I couldn't add anything to that because I'd never experienced anything like that before. I'm sure he didn't need me to say anything, so I just threw my arms round him and pulled him into a hug. I had no idea how he held it together so well, I wanted to cry just thinking about it.

 

“I'm okay, Frank, really-” He laughed, patting my back.

 

“I'm so sorry.” I mumbled into his shoulder.

 

“You don't-”

 

“No, I shouldn't have gotten angry – that was really insensitive of me. I'm really sorry.”

 

He didn't reply, just pulled me closer.


	35. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 35

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank encounters Mikey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YYYYYYYYYO  
> what's up, I'm sorry about my hiatus but I'm back now  
> I hope you're all happy

The following day went smoothly. I was too tired to do anything and had just sat, slumped back at my desk for the whole day. I had gotten home pretty late from Gerard's the previous day which meant my mom was up waiting for me. When she asked me where I'd been as I passed the kitchen door I came out with the uniform excuse – Ray's house. She believed it, since in years past Ray and I were inseparable.

 

I had Art last period, so I was pretty worn out. In fact, I could barely keep my eyes open long enough to make any progress on my drawing. I had only managed to do a few more lines by the time the final bell rang, and when it did I found it difficult to move from my seat. Eventually, after everyone had started filing out, I gathered up my bag. I waited until the door had slammed shut a final time before making my way over to Gerard's desk. I didn't even say anything, just stood and waited for him to pack up his things and put on his coat.

 

“You didn't do much this period.” He muttered as he stood up.

 

“I'm tired.” I uttered through a pretty exaggerated yawn . The weight of my back was pulling me downwards and forcing me into a slouch.

 

“Here, you can carry these.” He said - and before I could make an excuse he handed me a box stacked high with books. It was really heavy, despite it only being maybe a few classes-worth.

 

He put a hand on my lower back and walked with me to the door, only taking it away when we stepped out into the corridor, where we walked together in silence. Not an awkward silence, just the kind where we were both tired and didn't really have much to say. I was about to continue down to the main school entrance until Gerard stopped at a fire exit.

 

“This way's quicker.” He smiled holding the door open and allowing me to step out ahead of him.

 

“You really need to work on your drawings.” He said once we'd stepped out into the gentle breeze.

 

“I know, I know.” I said, trying to brush off the idea. It _was_ true, I had been working on the same charcoal picture for about two weeks now - and although I'd like to say I spent all my time with Gerard, that wasn't exactly the truth. I did spend a lot of my time doing unimportant things too, like jacking off, playing video games, laying around doing nothing, and jacking off some more.

 

“I know you're probably busy and all, and maybe I shouldn't be taking up your time-” He continued as we walked across the car park.

 

“Ugh, don't say that.” I rolled my eyes. “I don't need another mom”

 

“Hey, like I said, I'm your teacher above all.” We started to head in the direction of his car. I wasn't going home with him but he'd managed to trap me into being his personal pack horse.

 

We were only a few feet away and Gerard had started to fish around in his pocket for his keys, when a familiar voice came from behind us.

 

“Gerard!”

 

We both spun round and I managed to drop the books in my moment of panic. I winced as they all fell one by one - followed by the box, which hit the ground with a thud. I instantly dropped to my knees and scrambled to pick them all up, feeling like a complete tool and wishing a car would just drive by and hit me now. I looked up in time to see a pair of black boots approaching, stopping just in front of me. I craned my neck back and looked up into the eyes of Mikey – the man who was oh-so-oblivious to my presence the other day.

 

I stared up at him in awe. Now I could see how much he actually looked like Gerard. They both had the same colour of eyes the same lips. Even the same perfectly - arched eyebrows. Although Mikey had thick-rimmed glasses and swept-back brown hair - his face seemed a lot thinner too.

 

“Need any help?” He asked, furrowing his brows at me.

 

“N-no.” I stammered, gathering up the last few books and putting them back in the box before clambering back up onto my feet.

 

“What're you doing here?” Gerard asked, looking bemused.

 

“We're going to mall, remember?” He replied, raising his eyebrows and holding up his car keys. There was a brief pause and Gerard's features remained vacant as he thought to himself. “Ugh, don't tell me you forgot _again._ ” Mikey groaned, rolling his eyes and taking a step back from his brother.

 

“I'm sorry, I've just been so busy-” The darker haired man tried to explain, scrambling for an excuse. “Look, let me just put these away and we'll go, okay?” He said, slotting his key in the trunk and opening it. Mikey and I shared a second of eye contact and a wry smile while Gerard put the books away in his trunk and locked it. I didn't want to stick around much longer, so I muttered a quick goodbye to Gerard and turned to leave.

 

“I'll see you tomorrow, right?” He called after me. “I'm not gonna have to report you for skipping class am I?”

 

I spun round and was about to shoot him a glare, when his mouth twisted into a smirk. He was only joking, how could I still fall for those same snide remarks? I smiled back, but before I could say anything in reply he turned away and followed the other man across the car park.

 

 

 

There was only one place I could've possibly ended up that night - and when I did get there, the atmosphere had changed.

 

Ray let me in, but instead of his usual, cheery reply he seemed rather tentative and cautious. He still smiled and gave me a slap on the back as I went inside, but he seemed as if he was extra careful with selecting his words. I thought _that_ was strange, but that was only the beginning. To be honest, I had been dreading going to Ray's that evening because of Amy. We hadn't seen each other or spoke since I'd almost chucked up all over her lap – I'm sure she didn't appreciate that.

 

I stood in the doorway of the living room, quickly glancing between Amy – who was sitting with her knees pulled to her chest, and Hannah – who was shooting me a look that could make flowers wilt and children cry. I decided that for my own safety, it was probably better not to take another step into that room, so I grabbed Ray's arm and dragged him to the kitchen.

 

“What the fuck is going on?” I hissed, unintentionally shoving him against the fridge, knocking off a few magnets in the process.

 

“Look, man, I didn't know you were coming over-” Ray began, holding his hands up as if he were surrendering his life.

 

“What's with the giant stick up everyone's ass?! Hannah's pissed at me and you are too!” I tried to keep relatively quiet, but I was one of those people that couldn't control the volume of their voice - Gerard had commented on that once or twice.

 

“Well, Hannah's still pretty pissed about the state you were in last time you were here, and Amy's feeling pretty used.”

 

“What!? Used?”

 

“Yeah. Used!”

 

I huffed a little and broke eye contact with Ray. Now that I thought about it, it was kind of a dick move to kiss her like that. What was it she'd said? She wanted us to be boyfriend and girlfriend before we kissed, fat chance of that. “I feel terrible about it, Ray, but I was drunk... I don't want anything from her.” I shrugged, attempting to sound sincere.

 

“Yeah, why'd you do it then?”

 

I didn't have an answer for him. I couldn't say I was drunk – that was a petty excuse. I'd admitted to myself that it was a shitty thing to do.

 

“Let me guess, you just wanted to get back at Mr Way?”

 

“Shut up!” I blushed furiously, cringing at the very mention of Gerard's name.

 

“It's true, isn't it. You guys got into a fight and you wanted to make him jealous.” Ray went on, folding his arms across his chest. “For God's sake, Frank, when are you gonna end this?”

 

I was psyching myself up to hurl back some kind of defence, but my phone started to buzz in my back pocket. I took a step back and cleared my throat, returning to a normal volume before answering.

 

I couldn't even get out a 'hello' before my mum was screaming down the line at me. “Where the _fuck_ are you!?” She screeched, making me recoil from the phone in surprise. “I've been waiting up all night and day for you!”

 

“I thought you were supposed to be at work?” I blurted, stuttering and stammering over every word.

 

“I've got a day off, where have you been?”   
  
“I-I'm at Rays, I went out after school!” There was a brief pause where she took a breath and processed the information.

 

“Well you get your ass home right now!” She retorted, the line going dead without any kind of goodbye.

 

 

 

 

There was a tense atmosphere in the house as I stepped inside, and gravity suddenly seemed to take a toll on me, as I felt the impact of every footstep leading up to the kitchen door. I could see a plume of cigarette smoke through the doorway before I entered, where I found her draped across one of the chairs at the table. Next to her sat a glass of wine and an ashtray. “Don't even start explaining, Frank. Cause I know.” She said, very calmly and precisely so that it struck a chord in my mind.

 

“What?” I stood there, drenched in fear as she slowly and carefully balanced her cigarette on the edge of the ashtray and looked up at me.

 

“Who do you think you are? Staying out all day and night and leaving me with nothing but an empty house to come home to?” She began, gesturing around her. I pursed my lips together, too scared to come up with anything. “You've been away all week, and don't tell me you were at Ray's... cause I phoned his mother.”

 

I winced and looked down at the floor, I knew fine well that I wasn't at Ray's before last night, but I'd used that excuse all week.

 

“She told me that you and Ray had fallen out. She says she hasn't seen you in about two weeks.”

 

“Mom, I was at Ray's at the weekend, I stayed over.”

 

“What about before then?”

 

I fell silent, my train of thought flat lining. There was no excuses springing to mind, I was fucked. So I did the only thing I knew how to do in a stressful situation, I ran away.

 

“That's right, just run off!” My mum called as I bolted upstairs. “You're to be home at nine every night from now on!” I slammed my bedroom door behind me, shutting out her voice. I flopped down on my bed, burying my face into my pillow and letting my eyes slide shut. I would think of an excuse later, because was I fuck coming home at nine.

 


	36. I Hate Mr Way - Chapter 36

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank receives some intriguing news

“Hey.”

 

Gerard spun round in his computer chair, some kind of red food substance at the corners of his mouth and his hair falling in his face. He seemed alarmed at first, but sunk down in relief when he saw it was just me.

 

“Uh, come in.” He smiled sitting up straight and shuffling the papers and books around on his desk to make it seem like he was doing something. It wasn't very typical of me to visit Gerard at lunch, especially now I'd made up with Ray, so I could understand his surprise.

 

“And what makes you grace my presence today?” He asked as I dragged a chair up beside his desk.

 

“Ray's staying in music with Hannah, so I thought I'd come pay you a visit.” I smiled, pulling out a can of coke from my bag. It was then that I noticed the half-finished pot of pasta by his computer, which explained the stuff around his mouth.

 

“You've got pasta sauce on your face.” I said bluntly, causing him to blush and feel around his cheek and chin nervously. “On your mouth.” I directed, pointing to the corners of my own mouth. He rubbed it off successfully using a crumpled napkin and managed to salvage some of his dignity.

 

“You're a messy eater.” I smiled.

 

“Don't you start.” A smile began tugging at the corners of his lips. I giggled to myself and cracked open my can of coke. He turned back to his computer and closed the window he had open before turning his full attention back to me. “Have you finished your drawing?” He asked, swiftly moving the conversation away from his childish eating habits.

 

I unzipped my bag and pulled out the drawing I'd stayed up all night finishing – seeing as I was forbidden from going out past nine – and handed it to him. I watched eagerly as his eyes scanned the page. You'd think I'd be over it by now, but I still tensed up whenever he looked over my work. He broke out into a smile and let out a quiet chuckle.

 

“What?”

 

“You're improving.” His eyes remained trained on the page – much to my advantage because he didn't see the goofy smile on my face.

 

He passed the drawing back to me and I tucked it away in my bag, trying – and probably failing – to hide my joy over that compliment. As I did so, the door swung open behind me, making my stomach lurch forward.

 

“Oh, sorry, am I uh...”

 

It was one of the other two teachers in the department – the one who went by Ms Weir, who I recalled as being extremely cunty after our brief encounter outside Mrs Lattison's office a few weeks back. Now she was glancing between the two of us, wondering if she'd walked into the middle of a scolding.

 

“Its fine, Debbie. Come in.” Gerard smiled assuringly.

 

She did so, closing the door behind her and proceeding to ignore my presence for the next few minutes.

 

“I looked up the venues, like I said I would-” She began, pulling out her mobile and walking over to Gerard's side “- and I'm torn between these two.” She said, holding the screen out for Mr Way to see. I saw Gerard glance over at me awkwardly before examining whatever it was she was showing him.

 

“Uh, yeah... they're uh... they're good.” He nodded, plastering on a smile. I narrowed my eyes at him in a questioning manner, wondering what on earth she was on about. He knew I was just waiting for her to leave so I could probe him about it. “I like 'em both.”

 

“Well you're gonna have to decide,” she chuckled “this is your decision.” I didn't like how close she was, or how her eyes were so fixated on him, or how she laughed and smiled at whatever he said.

 

“Uh... well, what's cheapest?” He shrugged.

 

“This one.” She swiped her screen, showing him another photo presumably.

 

“Yeah, that's great. Book it.” He uttered, his replies all short and blunt as if he was trying his best to get rid of her.

 

“I'll do that when I get a minute” She smiled as she _finally_ made her way to the door. “You should be excited, you're always running around like a madman. It'd be good to have some fun.”

 

“I'm sure It'll be fun,” he retorted “I'll see you later.”

 

She uttered a cheery farewell and left, letting the door slam on her way out. I instantly turned to Gerard and shot him a look. “So what was all that about?” I pressed. I wasn't necessarily being pushy or nosey, I was just a little curious.

 

“Uh... It's my birthday soon.” He muttered, lowering his voice as if it was something shameful. My eyes instantly lit up and a grin broke out across my face. “I don't usually make a big deal about it, but the staff.. they wanna throw me a party.”

 

“We should do something!” I had blurted out the statement before I could even begin to think about the connotations.

 

“Like what? We can't exactly go out somewhere.” He shrugged, sinking back into his chair. A little bit of sense was smacked back into me when he said that, but it still didn't kill my enthusiasm.

 

“Well, we can always do something at your house?” I was leaning forward on his desk now, my arms folded in front of me on top of strewn bits of paper. “I just want to do something special.”

 

His expression changed and he was stifling back a smile, trying to remain logical and focused but failing. “What did you have in mind?” He asked, growing more interested in the idea.

 

“Well, uh...” I started, biting my lip and raking my brain for things to do. “D'you like movies?” It was a stupid question, I knew that even before Gerard shot me a snide look. “What movies are you into? Cause like, uh, we could have a marathon?”

 

He sat back in his chair again, eyes wandering round the room as he thought. “I like horror movies.” He stated. “Might be a bit scary for you though.”

 

“Shut up. I watch horror movies too.”

 

“Not the classics, I bet.”

 

I huffed and rested my chin on my forearms, looking up at him through my lashes and hoping it was getting through to him that I was trying my best.

 

“Don't get me anything, please.” He said. “I really don't like being spoiled.”

 

“Aw.” I pouted, “But I want to do something nice for you.”

 

“Well then _do_ something.”

 

 

 

 

 

“This is by far one of the most uncomfortable situations I've been in for you.” Ray said in protest as I dragged him around the store that weekend.

 

“Shut up, I really need a second opinion.” I said, stopping in front of the pencils and charcoals. “I dunno if he already has all this stuff.” I mused, biting my lip and scanning the huge selection – most of them being brands I'd never heard of.

 

“Well, he _is_ an art teacher. What do _you_ think?”

 

“Ugh, you're right.” I sighed, holding my head in my hands. It was so hard buying a gift for Gerard, the only thing I knew he _really_ liked was art, but I wasn't even sure specifically what kind.

 

“Look, why don't you just draw him something?” Ray suggested, nudging me in the shoulder reassuringly once he'd noticed I was stressing out. “I'm sure he'd really like that.”

 

“I'm shit at it.”

 

“Bullshit, you're amazing. You've got your own style, dude.” I'm sure he didn't know what he was talking about, but I appreciated his help. “Trust me man - he's the expert. He sees the good in you, y'know?”

 

I took a step closer to one of the display stands and picked out a pack of charcoal pencils, examining the brand name and information. I really had no idea what the best choice was, but I didn't have an awful lot of money, so I had to go with the cheapest option. That day I learned that not only were art stores extremely huge and confusing, they were also expensive as fuck.

 

I couldn't wait to get home and try out these charcoal pencils. I only used the big sticks in art class, and these looked like they'd be much easier to use. There were six of them, all with a different number written on them, which I found out had something to do with the shade of the pencil.

 

I had bought myself a few good sheets of paper, but I couldn't for the life of me think of what to draw. I'd only really drawn men for the past few months, and Gerard told me to keep drawing in that blocky, unrealistic way. I practiced some ideas on a piece of lined paper, but I ended up giving up halfway through each little sketch. After about half an hour, I threw the pencil down in frustration and sighed exasperatedly. I was having a total block, there were no ideas coming to mind at all – it was annoying.

 

Feeling defeated, I decided to go to bed. As I laid there I couldn't stop pondering over what could happen next weekend, at Gerard's. We'd decided that I would tell my Mom I was getting some tutoring, then going to Ray's. I would have to be home by seven or eight, so that she wouldn't get suspicious. I hadn't anticipated how tired I was, and it didn't take long before I fell asleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry, kind of a shitty chapter, just had to get this part out the way


End file.
